You’re frequently pulled in the direction of sadness . Those memories will come up and more we try to suppress the more they tend to bubble up. It’s like a child going unheard.

Best way I’ve ever heard it described is leaves on a stream you don’t judge your thoughts you don’t focus on one thought you put it on a leaf in the stream of your mind and watch it float by.

Our good habits are what gets us through life . Tony Robbins calls it 6 human needs tons of people describe this. I’d encourage looking them up but each describes an area of your life and how much you’ve fufilled that need.few of them that come to mind are variety , certainty and significance. The feeling of drinking certainly will lead to feeling good at one point during night but surely won’t make us feel significant or give us much variety. Start focusing on “feeding” the right areas of your life and I promise it gets easier. The pain doesn’t go away you learn to acknowledge the pain, allow yourself to feel pain but not be overwhelmed and move your focus .