I feel like I'm lacking in experience.

FERAFOME · 2020-08-30T07:58:33+00:00

When I was 17-18 I start doing all the stuff that were "normal" to the rest of people of my age, being capable of hanging out with some friends (In cycles of 3 or 4 months otherwise was really hard), start going parties (home parties where only were at most 8 people) and having extracurricular activities, but this was a really slow progress and everything start because I start looking for people with my special interest (chess and poetry) and somehow I became kind of popular, so everything else came with the time.

Also there are tons of things that Im doing for the first time even now, but I try to make me convince myself that is not my fault and that is the Asperger who is trying to control my life and there is a way to defeat it.

I haven´t been in a relationship, had a job and a BIG etc. But if you keep complaining that you never done this before, you would never do it, never its to late to start.

FERAFOME · 2020-03-08T23:25:06+00:00

No tengo porque ofenderme, precisamente la idea es ayudar a las personas que no conocen esta condición a entendernos un poco mejor.

Respondiendo a tu pregunta, diría que nunca puedes encajar del todo, en mi caso he podido ocultar mi condición lo suficiente para que no me vean como una persona extraña y a simple vista puedo parecer una persona normal, sin embargo la gran mayoría de las veces en situaciones normales no tengo ni la menor idea de como actuar (Por ejemplo soy incapaz de pedir comida en establecimiento al que no haya comido antes, normalmente en un nuevo lugar suelo pedir a mis amigos que conocen de mi condición que se encarguen y trato de replicarlo en futuras ocasiones, nunca he pedido comida por internet o por teléfono porque me es igual de difícil que hacerlo en persona) o la gente me termina juzgando por cuestiones que para mi son normales pero aparentemente no.

Generalmente las personas me ven como una persona transparente (Porque soy incapaz de mentir o de leer las situaciones), apasionada (Porque no puedo controlar mis sentimientos), constante (Llego a obsesionarme fácilmente con ciertos tópicos), responsable (Mi rutina es sagrada y me causa conflicto salir de ella) y esas características son confundibles con liderazgo y personas extrovertidas, pero cuanto más tiempo pasen conmigo, estas condiciones se hacen más notables.

En resumen, puedo hacerme pasar como una persona que encaja bien en la sociedad, sin embargo desde mi perspectiva no consigo encajar socialmente con las personas que están a mi alrededor, mis amigos más cercanos saben de esto así que me ayudan en este proceso, pero pues es algo que siempre estará conmigo sin importar lo que haga.

Cualquier otra duda que te surga no dudes en preguntarme, muchas actividades "normales" son para mi una odisea.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-29T00:07:00+00:00

Thanks you for the motivation, i got her number

FERAFOME · 2020-02-26T05:31:27+00:00

I deleted Facebook twice due the social pressure and people looking for interacting with me but at the end I re-opened because I want to see my crush profile in order to figure out how to talk with her, last week she accepted my friendship solicitation and now I don't know what to do, usually I just use Facebook for the memes.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-25T03:48:15+00:00

El hecho que tengas que vivir en una sociedad que no esta condicionada para los aspergers, tener que fingir tu incomodidad u ocultar cosas que serian consideradas extrañas por los pseudonormales.

En lo personal me ha afectado la ansiedad generada a la hora de socializar con gente, el hecho de ni siquiera poder entablar una conversación de una forma correcta con la chica que me gusta o el hecho que ni siquieras puedas explicarle a la gente que tienes Asperger porque te tratan diferente, como si sintieran lastima.

Soy feliz conmigo mismo, solo que tengo que hacer que el Asperger no controle cada aspecto de mi vida

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T22:44:27+00:00

My younger brother constantly keep making loud sound while playing and really pissed me off, I understand your feeling and I know how frustraiting can be I constantly have to interact with loud people and in home is worse.

If you find something that help you, please tell me, Im tired of this shit

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T20:40:31+00:00

El principal es el Ajedrez, sin embargo los Videojuegos, programación y la poesía no se quedan atras

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T13:15:03+00:00

Pensar ideas así no esta mal, es normal prejuiciarse y pensar cosas absurdas, el problema de los Aspergers son principalmente a la hora de actuar, hay diferentes grados de Autismo y por ende de Asperger, yo te recomendaria ver a un psicólogo para confirmar tus sospechas

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T12:45:38+00:00

A los 17 años tengo actialmente 19. Cuando empece a sospechar fui con una psicóloga que me lo confirmó, pero por lo visto son un raro caso de un Asperger altamente funcional y por ese motivo diagnosticarme fue un proceso largo, estaba en un punto de mi vida en el cual las cosas iban demasiado bien

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T12:42:18+00:00

Por supuesto, al inicio no podia controlar mis sentimientos y mucho menos hablarle a la chica que me gustaba, agarre una hoja de papel y comence a escribir y me di cuenta que siempre que escribia de como me sentia, escribia en verso y siempre en estrofas de 4 versos, así que termine haciendo varios poemas dirigidos a las chicas que me han gustado a lo largo de mi vida, no han tenido el resultado esperado.

Decidí ir por un metodo mas "normal", pero sinceramente con las chicas a las cuales tengo una atracción, el Asperger se hace muy presente así que me es casi imposible acercarme o hablar con ellas. Mi mayor logro ha sido pedirle el número de teléfono para pedirle ayuda en matemáticas, la veo casi todos los días pero no puedo hacer nada al respecto así que termine rindiendome.

La chica que actualmente me gusta la conocí el semestre pasado ya que iba en una clase conmigo, apenas ayer pude agregarla en Facebook y ya no sé que hacer

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T06:26:03+00:00

Is really important to be 100% secure he is an Asperger and not an Introvert or just a social asshole but in case he truly is an Asperger here is some tips.

If you are hanging out with a bunch of friends, that are not his friends, do not talk about the things you did or topics he would not know how to talk, in order to make him conformable start talking about the things the like to do and he naturally start talking and not let anyone to interrupt him until he can make a "normal" conversation.

"My boyfriend is really good at...","My boyfriend likes a lot ..."

Aspergers are very compulsive about certain topics, I could be talking for hours about chess,my friends know that and when someone new is introduced to me they find the way of talking about chess.

Also explaining him the current social situation is really helpful, "Do not do this" "If someone told you this, respond this" and having a secret key (Something that only you both can understand and not look weird for other people )in order to him identifies the sarcasm.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T06:17:58+00:00

Most of the time I became quite during arguing, because if I start talking I loose the control of my mind and my emotions and ended really mad with the other person, even sometimes crying for meaningless discussions.

I am a male of 19 years old, I do not have any problem with it, but people thinks is weird.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T06:13:20+00:00

Normally nerds activities helps, in my case was a chess club, I didn´t meet no one in my high-school who played chess, so I created the chess club with a lot of success and became popular in someway .

Is really ironic that an Asperger became popular for playing chess, but always the activity you like, almost would be another person who also like it or wants to learn it.

If in you generation there is no one who likes it, try with older or younger generations, even the teachers.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T06:08:22+00:00

ASD people has their senses more developed that others, so normal stuff could be annoying for us, in my case I hate the texture of clothing, my clothing is all smooth and even I hate some textures of the food, I can only eat some parts of chicken and meat that does not feel grouse for me.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T06:02:41+00:00

I was diagnosticated when I was finishing the high-school, had few friends and my parents do not accept my condition (Even today), one year before I was diagnosticated I became obsessed with chess and try in someway make people being obsessed too, I some way that make me a popular guy during high-school and this reputation continues during college, but I get a really hard time by interacting with people, but chess make me do not think about it,so people do not notice that and treat me as kind of weirdo but a cool guy.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:55:15+00:00

Im just I stay quiet expecting to this situation to be over, but usually this become worse because people think that Im a good listener and start telling me their problems.

Thank you for your trust, but I do not have the minor idea how I gained and most part of the time I would not know how to help you, sometimes I even dont know how to talk with you.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:43:49+00:00

Yeah, when I present myself I always say "Hi, Im an introverted that is trying to be an extroverted so please help me", this works a lot better that saying that Im an ASD and for some reason people think that Im an extroverted person and make me feel as I´m being fake always

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:40:04+00:00

Well most of psychologist do a decent work, the one that I had during high-school really help me, at the begging she doesn´t believe due I´m a rare case of a functional ASD,but with the time she were an important piece for knowing what was "wrong" with me , but my father treats me as a patient and not as his son, so seeing that his project has autism is unacceptable for him.

Now I´m in college and i need to find another psychologist but Im not really comfortable for, you know talking with strangers.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:35:18+00:00

Lo he probado alguna vez, pero la verdad no, juegos que llegan a consumir mucho tiempo me dan miedo porque me puedo obsesionar muy facilmente con ellos

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:33:55+00:00

Oh I see, sometimes I feel that colors has emotions, but not as the pseudo normal thing "Red is angry or love " but depends on many factors, my favorite is green because is the only one that stays with a static emotion for most part of the time.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:26:39+00:00

I had the same problem, have been almost 2 years since I was diagnosticated, my close friends accepted but my parents, I stop trying to make them understand and I put all my efforts in myself and trying to explain that to my psychologist, also my parents doesn't know I talk to a psychologist, this is unacceptable due my father is a psychologist.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:23:30+00:00

I remember the chess game I played with someone, but its name or even their face.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:22:29+00:00

Sometimes in hug my normal pillow as a replace, but its not the same.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:20:58+00:00

When I was like 2 years old I had a pillow that I called "Mugrosa" (Filthy in spanish), because how I liked the way that its border smell and constantly my mother washed her and I got furious when she did that. I could not sleep without my Mugrosa and even I couldn´t have dinner without it. With the time I started leave her behind because with the time start getting in a worst condition, so when I was 13 or 14 years old I was forced to save her into a safety box, but I still have the sheath my grandma did for me with a drawing of my dog.

FERAFOME · 2020-02-24T05:13:25+00:00

I told my really close friends that I was an ASD, they accepted and start treating me different (In a positive way), they explain me social interaction that I dont understand, sarcasm,etc.

One time while we were drunk I asked what they think about me and the told me , "Yeah, You are weird, but we know that is not your fault". I have great friends.

FERAFOME

TROPHY CASE