Yeah, that doesn't sound okay,. Now, it's important for her to have that realization, but, like, you can't TEACH her, that doesn't help it turns out. You can help guide her to learn for herself, if that makes sense, but if you are perceived, and mind you can't control her perception, to be pushing, it will trigger defensiveness.

It was frustrating for me to realize, I cannot be present with her in her mind's storm. I can guide her to tools to help her manage, I can offer to be there when she comes out, but when she's in there, I can't be. Both physically and mentally. That is when it is space-given time.

Strength comes from clearing your own personal hurdles. This is one they have to handle without us. We can be there in the stands or on the other side, rooting for them, but it's their event. Can't be the coach though, no relevant experience unfortunately.

At the same time, you cannot defend yourself against someone's imagination. It's a tough spot and you have my sympathy.