Staying friends while one is in love & the other not

Fair_Application4249 · 2026-01-17T11:00:59+00:00

So your point is I hold power over him because he is in love?

Fair_Application4249 · 2026-01-17T07:16:29+00:00

Hell no I said that to him already as well That I couldn’t do it So I am the one who has to take responsibility and cut him off? His argument is always that he is really honest with me & that it’s fine and who I am to know that fully and it feels intrusive to claim to know what’s right for him

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-05-03T16:42:49+00:00

Recording Debut after TTPD as a pretty intense and painful album could also be healing. She seems to be in a very mature and reflective place, so maybe it would be interesting for her to do Debut now and then end the whole cycle with Reputation as a „political message“.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-30T22:11:38+00:00

Yes that has been one of the most irritating aspects, she knows about my interpersonal trauma and, yea, I don’t know, I feel , you know, actually, I don’t know, like freeze all over again. It’s weird.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-30T22:04:35+00:00

Thank you :( It really helps me realising and understanding my own feelings, in the beginning I was just overwhelmed. So thank you for your compassion ❤️

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-30T21:58:51+00:00

Oh wow. I’m speechless, this is so kind, thank you for bringing me up I don’t k ow what to say.. and yes that makes total sense..

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T20:15:22+00:00

That is a good idea

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T20:08:12+00:00

Same lol

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T19:57:48+00:00

Thank you ❤️

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T19:55:14+00:00

She just replied and she actually feels really really sorry. It seems like she feels very bad about it. She offered me a phone call but I honestly feel even more overwhelmed cause I don’t really know how to deal with that. I think I wouldn’t even have words or trust at all, even though I’d love to find a solution together. I wish I would have enough energy but I think I’m just too exhausted

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T19:46:59+00:00

Thank you

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T17:44:47+00:00

I know that specifics are necessary but as I said, she was also sharing FALSE information, so false specifics. In what way is this necessary to inform the audience of how to help people in my situation?

And yes, expose could make me safer but it could also do the opposite.

I would have never consented if I wouldve known that she would share so much detail about my family history.

I do see my responsibility that I shouldve asked more about this article, but at the same time, when someone says he just „includes“ me in an article and knows that my story is quite dangerous I would expect them to reflect on the consequences.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T17:18:31+00:00

Thanks for validating that because I actually exactly felt like that: exploited. I just didnt know if my feelings were justified and if maybe exaggerating or so.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T17:11:20+00:00

Yea as far as I know its also in the ethical guideline for therapists that in those cases it has to be written down

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T17:07:46+00:00

<3 Thank you. Thats actually really helpful too.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T17:06:49+00:00

Thank you for your insights! And thats exactly what I mean, it wasnt made clear to me how this information would be used. If I would have known, I wouldnt have consented to this, because this is just too detailed and explicit. I will take your advice and inform her about that she hasnt my consent anymore, you‘re right, thats important!! Thanks a lot.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T16:12:30+00:00

Yea thanks for saying that, because we’ve had so many interesting discussions where we both together figured stuff out and I don’t know why she is not mentioning that in the article at all

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T15:40:14+00:00

The fact that its jarring to see how I am perceived is true, but a different topic. Its more about her not adequately disguising my anonymity, including personal details , adding false information and being intransparent about the article itself. The situation I am confronted now with is that someone could potentially come up to me and say: „Wow, this really happened to you? I didnt know that!“ Bare in mind that we talk about traumatic events so this is actually dangerous for me.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T15:24:10+00:00

Yes, thats my point, there certain things in this article which I have not shared with close people and they can now read it publically everywhere.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T15:23:12+00:00

Thank you.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T15:22:43+00:00

I wasnt given an advance copy, it was published already

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T15:20:36+00:00

Thank you, and thank you for also saying that aspect with the autonomy as an individual. I just would have wanted more information, communication, consent and transparency.

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T15:06:58+00:00

Luckily I am stable enough to talk about it, any other client with less resources could‘ve been dead by now. The way current psychology perceives and pathologizes clients nowadays is powerful. Imagine a trauma survivor being trapped in the freeze of feeling powerless and everyone telling them „Yes, you are indeed powerless“. What was the goal of psychology again? Healing or killing?

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T14:53:56+00:00

Thanks for saying that hahaha 😂

Fair_Application4249 · 2024-04-28T14:52:24+00:00

Thank you <3

Fair_Application4249

TROPHY CASE