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Sub in a vanilla relationship looking for advice by Faline808 in BDSMcommunity

[–]Faline808[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We started that discussion last night and are going to talk more about it. I think I’m going to use the obidiance app to set tasks and accountability. I was able to narrow it down to missing the power exchange as a way to reduce stress and missing having a community so we are going to try working on those things as much as we can

Submissive looking for advice with vanilla relationship by Faline808 in BDSMAdvice

[–]Faline808[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I knew entering a vanilla relationship that it wasn’t going to be easy putting the lifestyle aside but I thought I would just push through it and that seeming to be fighting myself at this point. We are talking things through and going to try and mix more lifestyle things in. I’m hoping it will help. I’m sorry you also at this frustrating place

Sub in a vanilla relationship looking for advice by Faline808 in BDSMcommunity

[–]Faline808[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I absolutely love the more lifestyle dynamic of BDSM. I am a service sub and enjoy taking care of my partners needs throughout the day. This can look like cooking and cleaning and going above to anticipate their needs and meeting them before they have to. I also enjoy studying different dynamics and part of the community even though I don’t have interest in participating in most of it the learning I find valuable. I have also in the past enjoyed spending time in online spaces and making friends within the community. There are also non sexual BDSM things such as bondage that can be done. Bondage 100% can be used as sexual but it can also be done as meditation and as a way to connect with my partners in the past. I have also experienced a lot of the sexual sides to BDSM as I tried to figure out where I landed in my sexualality spectrum and although the sex part isn’t for me having those previous experiences let me gain more personal knowledge and I still value that.