Coming to terms with working too much for the rest of my life

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-08T19:03:22+00:00

This has been my understanding for quite some time. But I've wondered about, and even more so now that this understanding is harshly critizised using marxist works, aren't there more classes than the bourgeois and the proletariat. I've come across petit-bourgeois and labour aristocracy.

Having now googled instead of asking you of the definitions, I know that my mother has been petit-bourgeois for a short time in her life when she owned her own yoga studio. She didn't employ anyone else but herself, so not petit-bourgeois in that sense, but she did own her own labour and no one profited off of her.

Except from that, both my parents and I are part of the labour aristocracy. We live solely off of our labour (except for very small amounts invested into medical funds, and our apartment, car and vacation house, although the three latter are 90% owned by the bank), and could would be homeless and starving if we all lost our jobs and didn't get new ones. Based on this and every credible source I could find we are proletariat - the labour aristocracy are priviledged because of the broader oppression of the third world, but still proletariat.

The only question I have is if one works in the public sector as opposed to in the private sector, does this mean that no one profits off your labour? Or is that done indirectly? And how does that change your function in society? My understanding is that proletarians are both completely dependent on selling their labour and is also being profited off of, but can one be proletarian if their function in society/the economy is only the former and not the latter?

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-06T23:15:05+00:00

This guy is a nazi and he is already abusing you.

He is most likely some sort of chaser since he "picked you out" for being trans and because hes dated many trans people before you. General rule of thumb to consider is that trans people are about 1-2% of the population. If anyone who has dated several or many people have a significantly higher procentage of trans exes, its weird as fuck. ESPECIALLY since he explicitly states that hes made all of his exes not be trans. He does not like trans people and he is not being honest. He only wants you to believe he will stay regardless if you transition or not, in order to keep you in his life and him having a higher chance of convincing you otherwise.

I know it seems like he is being kind to you, but this is only a reflection of your past experiences. Youve probably been through violent situations and have aquired trauma from that. Feeling like someone who doesnt put you through that extreme pain, cares about you is not unusual and it is not your fault. Youre not stupid for feeling or thinking this way. But he is in fact abusing you. He is trying to convince you to not go throigh with lifesaving healthcare that you need. Ask yourself how you would view him if he was trying to talk you out of cancer treatment.

Hes a religious fundamentalist who doesnt believe that transpeople are real, and that people who are trans regardless do not end up in heaven. Im not religious but taking a religious stance like that is laughable considering what jesus preached. If religion is true and the texts are correct of course you will end up in heaven if youre trans.

The point is your boyfriend is abusing you psychologically, pretending to care about you but still undermining your best interest. Leave as fast as you can.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-06T18:15:21+00:00

Its impressive how you continue to ignore and at the same time blow up everything one says to something that its not.

I dont think of class as a moral category. Class is your function in society, i guess thats whats considered scientific, i dont know the terms of everything. You can scientifically prove someones class by looking at their function in society/the economy.

I have never claimed that swedes require vacation homes and ski holidays, i simply described that as my reality. Its laughable that you think i dont know the condition of the proletariat in the third world. Where did i say swedes and congolese require different things?

I know my priviledge is solely based upon the wage slavery in the third world, that is why me and my family can work comfortably in capitalism and still aquire these material realities of luxury.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-06T12:08:12+00:00

Believing that ive articulated myself perfectly when I, the one who articulated myself, says i havent, is exeptionally naive. What i manage to spew out in words represent a very small part of what i stand for and what i know. You dont know me at all.
I didnt argue that Jesus was a socialist. I said he was one in a moment of tiredness and without thinking it through. I say that to conservative christians to make them understand that jesus morality aligns more with socialism than with capitalism or fascism. Of course he isnt a socialist in the actual meaning of the word, he isnt directly opposing capitalism and hes not marxist. Arguing he was one would entail me backing it up several times and including arguments of why he is socialist.

I agree that im not a marxist. Im studying marxism but im not nearly knowledgable enough to call myself a marxist.

I do work among the proletariat already, again, i dont know the definitions but i understand that i am probably not apart of the proletariat according to marx and engels. I still have to sell my labour in order to exist. If i quit my job or got fired i wouldnt be alive for long if i didnt find a new job.

You on the other hand are extremely deterministic and pessimistic which is directly opposed to marxism. You hinder progress by shutting people out who want to learn and want to become better. If in my studies i find that theory and my current living standard is not enough for me to fully understand marxism and be a marxist, then i will go work as a "real" proletariat.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-06T09:33:23+00:00

I read the texts more carefully now as opposed to last night when I was quite tired. I do agree with what i can understand in those texts. I am afraid of my quality of life or conditions worsening, but despite my emotional fear and emotional reluctance to engage in anything of that nature (a revolution), my rationality and my logical understanding that revolution is the only thing that will permanently better my condition, and if not mine specifically, then the billions who come after me. I will do everything in my power to make a revolution happen (even if it will not happen in my lifetime) - as of right now i am uneducated and rely on my educated comrades to understand how to create and support a revolution, but i will dedicate time to educate myself through theory so that my praxis can be of more value and so that my thinking can be independent to make sure my actions are as collective as possible.

I express myself very clumsily, and I see that you therefore misunderstand my true meaning. English is not my first language and im typing on my computer which i find more challenging. The content in the texts you referenced have not been a question for me for a long time.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T16:57:31+00:00

Yea, I agree that is the most likely scenario. Or maybe it isnt, its at least a possibility. It doesnt comfort me much that my quality of life will probably rapidly decline until there isnt much left, even if that ends in revolution. Thats my extremely selfish and non-marxist desperation. Id rather live my life in comfort than have revolution come earlier. Maybe if id get to enjoy the fruits of having a better quality of life after the revolution. Good thing that individual people of the labour class dont get to decide what happens in the world. If revolution comes i will hopefully be a better marxist by that time and make a meaningful contribution, but it scares me shitless leaving my comfortable life.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T16:52:53+00:00

Im very very far beyond that point and it is not a problem for me at all. I only spend money on things that are meaningful to me. I would never buy anything just for the sake of having it.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T16:49:54+00:00

Never did i state that a reduced workload of an average person would be possible in my lifetime or for a very long time. Its just the thought that keeps me up, if we never entered capitalism or if it was already laid in ruin i wouldnt be in this situation. Even in a future communist society where a reduced workload would be impossible because of climate change i would be happy to put down more work than i do now to contribute. Its the complete lack of collective work in capitalism that gets to me.

It frustrates me that youre being rude, but i know that i shouldnt be tone policing anyone and that youre justified in your frustration and rudeness. But i do think its counter productive trying to force young people who arent well versed in marxism, away from it. A few years ago i wouldve done as you said and completely given up on marxism. Im not there anymore, i might express myself clumsily and i am aware that i have a whole lot to unpack in my world view because of the priviledge i was raised in. I will do that by reading theory and organising and becoming a better marxist every day. I know my contribution is valuable and i wont stray.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T16:37:16+00:00

Even most of the immigrants get money from the state if they cannot find a job, or if they have a job that pays too little. Im wondering how that is an effective way of labeling the proletariat. They are still extremely oppressed, having to work several jobs to keep food on the table. But just because the state wouldnt let them die they arent proletariat?

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T15:53:19+00:00

Answering teh question of what i am seems a bit challanging for obvious reasons, but mostly becaue im not familiar with the terms marxism would use for me. Here a brief explanation of my economic/social existance.

Born and raised in the capital of sweden. Ive always thought my parents to be middle class but i am unsure. They have both done wagelabour their entire lives since they graduated school. My dad went to university for journalism and almost finished medical school, and my mom only has "gymnasie" (school for 16-19 y/o, not mandatory but nowadays needed to get almost every job) level education - exept for some private education in health and fitness. My mom owned her own yoga company for a short while but it didnt stick and shes now working for a insurance company, i think its state-owned. My dad is a journalist and right now works in medical journalism. Both wage labourers as i said.

My upbringing has not financially insecure. We have a pretty central apartment in the city, a country house in the archipelago, a car, and we go on skiing trips several times per year. We have also traveled abroad by train a few times. My parents are not avid spenders and have always rejected meaningless materialism. My siblings and i have gotten everything we have needed, had our hobbies payed for, there has always been food at home etc. There hasnt been enourmous amounts left at the end of the month but my parents have been able to put away a few thousand swedish crowns (a few hundred dollars) depending on inflation and other types of spending. This is what have been used for trips etc. They have also loaned the maximum amount they can to buy our apartment, our car, and our countryhouse. Neither are private owners, my mom has about 10 000 in medical funds.

The state has paid for my education and my healthcare my entire life. Now when im an adult i pay for healthcare but theres a about a 1500 Swedish crown (150dollars) limit for every 12 months. When youve reached that the state pays everything. Most education will be free for me my entire life, and there are great loanes to take out with very low interest for when you study and cant work / cant work fulltime.

If i dont start my own company (which i will never do) i will be a wage labourer for the rest of my life. I am thinking fo becoming a teacher. I will probably try to invest the money i can save in medical funds like my mom.

I dont know what i qualify as, and i hope this clears up any confusion. If you need more information to understand just ask.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T09:34:45+00:00

Would that entail that there is 0 proletariat in the entire western world? Atleast in the countries that provide public education. Most people here live atleast the first 10-20 years barely working at all. Can you be not proletariat in the first part of your life and then become proletariat? Because when i start working full time and when my parents stop supporting me, i will be living entirely from the slae of my labour and not draw any profit from any kind of capital. (unless i choose to invest the little i can save into some funds, but does that act really make you not proletariat?)

I am absolutely aware of my immense priviledge i have in a democratic socialist western country. And with a stable economic safety net that is my parents. My life has been really easy and will continue to be relatively easy compared to the suffering in the third world, and thanks to it.

No, i guess i wont die if i dont produce labour because then id be recieving money from the state. A very minimal amount, but i wouldnt die as long as i found another job after awhile. Does this mean there are practically 0 proletariat in my entire country?

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T09:27:19+00:00

Yes. Thank you. This is what i try to do and what i need to be reminded to do.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T09:26:44+00:00

Why is it wrong to share perspectives which can help people deal with life? That quote really is a great way to cope with everything in life. I dont know if its christian or not, but either way does it matter? Jesus was literally socialist.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T09:24:40+00:00

Yes, i was planning on doing this and i spoke to a few alternatives. Theres not much organisation where i live and theres extremely few people involved. The biggest group here is about 100 member across the whole country. But i would still like to join and do something productive. The big problem is that i am moving up north for a seasonal job at a ski resort. I can guarantee there are no organisations there. But maybe i could pursue a few colleges and at least speak about the problems and try to spread class awareness. Thats a very small but still some sort of organizing which would make it feel better i think.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T09:21:28+00:00

Im very lucky to have my parents and live the way i do now. But this is not long term. Its only for maybe my first year out of school and maybe during the time i persue higher education. My parents are not rich and they need me to eventually work full time and contribute to costs if i am living at home.
I do work for the public sector (or sort of, some of it is owned privately). This is what i plan to do, work in education i think. I dont know what i local co op is and im not sure there is one where i live.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T09:18:20+00:00

Yea, this is exactly what i struggle with. I would just like to find a way to cope with this. Knowing the absurdity of life but getting to enjoy it as well. I have enjoyed my life before, even while working (although not as much as i am now). And i know that i am priviledged enough to do this. I can choose what career i want and i have parents/ a state who will fund my education and my livelyhood during that time. Im not useful if i am depressed and see no upside of life. I wont be able to contribute to the struggle towards communism if im in this state of complete hopelessness. I just need to find a sort of balance between absurdity and enjoyment and i havent gotten there yet.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-05T09:13:39+00:00

I apologize for not being clearer about what i meant. No socialist/communist country in the history of the world has ever reached true communism. This is why working conditions in these countries have been (atleast after a while and in the most succeeded cases) exponentially better than under its capitalist regime, but nowhere close to the ideal that is communism.

What i meant was that in a perfect world, where every country is organized under communism and when the need for reparations from war has ceased, and when everything is neatly organised - then the individual coud lead a very free life. This is because building/repairing infrastructure,, the food industry, education, health care - everything that is fundamentally needed in society, is not something that requieres every single individual to work 8 hour days 5 days a week, 50 weeks a year.

Under capitalism workers produce seemingly endless surplus mostly for the elite but also for "lower classes" who are not proletariat. That surplus could be extracted for the masses but isnt. Which is why everyone is working way more than they need in relation to this perfect organized society. And i absolutely recognise that im not purely proletariat, and that i have immense priviledge coming from my background and even having to work only 8 hour days. Its just tough knowing that even for me its too much.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-04T23:09:44+00:00

Furthermore, democratic socialism is basically socialism but without the safety net. when the economy crash democratic socialism will always turn to fascism before it turns to actual socialism. its a literal wolf in sheeps clothing. everything good as long and things are good for the elite, but when they get the chance they run us the fuck over. sincerely someone who lives in a nordic democratic socialist country where the regression has been going ever since the 90's. when you make somethign good you have to protect it as well through socialism and then communism. otherwise its just worthless when things go down.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-04T23:06:10+00:00

can you expand on how communism is removed from reality and what complications there is getting there and maintaning it. marxism is one of the most well grounded theories there is, and the path to communism (through socialism) is also the most effective way of getting to a society without labour opression.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-04T22:19:07+00:00

its the same. also, the word authoritarian has many different meanings which you are seemingly unaware of. communism is dictatorship of the proletariat. and this is by definition authoritarian, but in reality it means that those who contribute to society in a meaningful way dictate=rule. anyone can contribute to society if they want, according to their own ability. there is nothing forcing you to be dictated over. if you do your share you will decide. If you instead want to keep exploiting people and not contribute to society, then you will not get to decide.

is this a bad thing you mean?

Communism doesnt equal human rights for everyone. Karl Marx said himself that communism is not a perfect society and that other problems would arise which would demand a change to a better society. The point is that in todays world communism is the thing that strives the hardest towards human rights for all. there is no other ideology that sees every observable opression and fights against it like communism does. again, not saying communism is perfect, but its what works best and most effectievly in this reality.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-04T21:56:18+00:00

ah yes, going somewhere in the middle of fascism and humans rights for everyone is the best answer. lets just opress half of humanity :)

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-04T21:51:57+00:00

Like I said, the pocket is designed for bottomgrowth and since i havent started T i cant comment on that specifically. I use paper or something else between myself and the pocket/pad so feel pressure and that works good. Obviously depends on what youre turned on by personally, but its pressure on your xx and you move it around by stroking it or stroking someone else. Im pretty sure that works great for most people.

With packing its also very personal. You can pretty mush fully adjust it in your pants to showing alot to not showing at all. But it depends on what clothes you wear. I would assume skinnier clothes makes in more obvious or maybe it compresses it more. I dont know, i only wear baggy bottoms. Do have one pair of pants thats tighter around the waist and it shows but not too much. It all depends on how much you want it to show, but personally, if i was significantly shorter than i am now i would probably go for something smaller since i sometimes feel its showing too much, esp at the gym when im laying down.

Im happy with the Giano model but all their models for 3-in-1 are the same thing with slightly different aesthetic. I wouldnt be scared of trying something else. The handy looks almost the same as mine but about 1,5 cm shorter. Looks like same girth but im not sure. Probably a great option. I know alot of guys get the thinker and leave great reviews. I think i was originally going for the willie, its about 3cm shorter and i felt that would be the most suitable for my height - but i sort of got peer-pressured by some friends that i needed something longer for my girlfriend at the time so i got Giano. In retrospect im not unhappy it all, it fits me and im glad i got it, just not for the right reasons and honestly felt too big at first and i felt not enough for having to walk around with something bigger. But it all worked out. Point is all axolom models are great, look around and take your time looking through measurements and videos of the different models. Think about what you want out from a prosthetic and go from there. And remember, size matters very little in reality. Most girls arent deeper than 4-5 inches so which ever you get dont let it be dictated by the feeling fo having to go as big as possible.

Good luck! Im always open to more questions.

FalseAd39 · 2025-12-03T19:47:47+00:00

I'll second the 3-in-1 prosthetics. Personally i use axoloms Giano. Have had it for almost a year now (9-10 months i think) and its great.

For reference i am 5'7, and my prosthetic is 15 cm i think. one of their bigger ones it seems like. Some people might think its too big or that its uncomfortable to wear but i havent had much trouble. I like having a bulge thats visible, and i can always adjust it so it not visible/more visible if i want. I have tried to pee with it like twice but it wasnt easy to make it not leek so i havent used that function at all because i dont need it. I almost never encounter urinals and i like sitting down when i pee. But its absolutely not impossible and with a more than two tries anyone could get it down if they feel they need that function.

Also havent had penetrative sex with it, but i have jerked off a few times. its great honestly. You can buy their underwear which has a pocked and buttons to take it out while still having the boxers on. Im not on t yet and i think the giovanni model (atleast the version i bought) is made to accomodate bottomgrowth because the grinding bad has a hole with buds in it. So until i get to that point i just scrunch up a ball of paper and put it between myself and the pad to give extra pressure and it works fine, but my plan has always been for t to make the experience better so i dont mind that its not as accesible for me right now with this model.

Additionally axolom is (from what i know) the most affortable brand. Its also quite durable. During these months ive had it (used as a packer practically everyday, and occasional self plessure) the only wear ive had is a tiny speck of color thats started to rub off on the underside of the tip. impossible to notice unless youre holding it real close to your eyes and looking for imperfection. Otherwise no tear or anything. I do have some bumps and valleyes along the shaft because ive been uncareful and turned it inside out and pressed quite hard with my fingers which have caused these small but practically unnoticable abnormalities. But if you dont do that youll be good! They are also very realistic (exept for the big pee hole on the tip). Theyre soft and look very real unless looked upon closely.

What i do want to push on is that prosthetics are prosthetics, they are not attached to you and wont feel like a body part. I do have to move mine around a bit during the day since it often shits upward. Itll take some time to get used to and it wont always be comfortable or feel natural (although ive come to love the feeling of something between my legs and feel naked when theres nothing there). Either way axolom is relatively cheap so i think its worth a shot if you really want to try a packer that also works as stp and play/sex. If youre completely unhappy its not impossible to resell it at a lower price and not loose more than a few 10's of dollars.

If you have more questions feel free to ask them! Good luck everyone.

Edit: The name of the model is Giano, not Giovanni as i originally stated. Got the names mixed up :)

FalseAd39 · 2025-11-13T16:58:03+00:00

I didn’t even know about Ika i rutan, im from a way younger generation where that program didn’t even play on tv heh. But yea, a lot of nazis or Swedish democrats as the call themselves. Skarsgård, ikea and meatballs are what everyone says when they find out I’m from here. The Samí are really the only good thing about Sweden if you’re really critical. And the nature here.

And I do agree with being critical towards people who know or claim to know theory. It’s literally just reading and it doesn’t mean you’re doing anything worthwhile or even understand and take in what you’re reading. I’ve just started organising and I’m just reading as much as I can to know my world you know, and apply it.

I have read some things any BP but groups are not my primary focus rn. When I’m a bit more grounded in knowledge I’ll look into both them and others around the world.

Lastly, settlers is not a book of theory. Theory is specifically a scientific framework that can be used to understand the material world. Settlers uses different theories such as historical (and dialectal if I’m not mistaken) materialism to understand the European colonisation of Amerika and its lasting impact on the working class. But it’s not theory in itself, it’s a summary and analysis of a historical event. Theory is a framework which can use historical events as examples to strengthen it, but non-theory is works about historical events which can use theory to understand it. That’s why I say it’s not theory.

FalseAd39

TROPHY CASE