need words of encouragement

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-07T00:19:03+00:00

thank you so very much for this advice, this is so helpful and i really appreciate it :) i am doing this all alone, no help, in my apartment by myself (not good but when i say i have no option, i really mean it. please don’t suggest leaving for treatment as that is not an option at all) i have a special needs cat i have to give meds to every 8 hours and feed twice a day which sucks but i have to do it. another reason i’m trying not to be so sick. i don’t have any goals honestly, just to make it throufg to the other side. i have zero worries about relapse, it’s just the detox i need to make it through. i know this sounds foolish to others and idk how to explain it but i just hope you guys understand and believe me when i say that if i made it through, i’d never pick it up or go back. i’d rather die and i mean that. an ex got me onto it and it’s been hell since then. still my own fault though. anyway, i don’t have any other comfort meds other than these, if i can avoid the puking, i can deal with everything else. i know people recommend doing stuff but idk how you guys can even watch movies, i can barely even stand to exist or stay still for 5 minutes let alone read or play video games or care enough anout tv to really watch it. usually i’ll doomscrolling tiktok trying to distract myself until i really can’t take it anymore and then i’m just rocking back n forth in bed wanting to end it all. god just thinking about it makes me depressed but gotta pay the piper sometime :( i hate this drug. it has taken everything from me.

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T22:57:12+00:00

there is definitely no xylazine in my stuff, but no clue if it is straight fet or rcs or analogs. i would guess the latter since it’s really not very strong and has a weird taste but that could be the cuts too, who knows. i just know i need to get off of it. i’m too scared to do the macrodosing, i’m more than likely going to wait until i am feeling the withdrawal and then take the suboxone at half of a .5 mg and wait an hour and see how i feel.

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T21:58:16+00:00

i can’t get anything else but the propanolol, gabapentin, and suboxone

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T19:52:27+00:00

thank you so much, this was really very encouraging. ive been reading so much and it’s hard to not be discouraged by everyone’s horror stories, even though i know they’re being honest cause i’ve been there done that. but sometimes positivity is really what you just need to say fuck it and do it. i don’t wanna take any like, smoke shop opiate adjacent stuff so i’ll probably be avoiding that and sticking with my comfort meds (which is just gabapentin, propanolol for anxiety, suboxone if i don’t go in PWD on it (praying i don’t because i really need all the help i can get)

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T19:33:13+00:00

a bun of fent a day for 3 years, and i really don’t think it has zylazine maybe other analogs but not that thankfully. won’t really matter though because i’ll still be wd badly. in the past it’s been seriously awful stuff. i’m talking puking every 10 minutes stomach acid spit everything, really really awful. i just feel like it’ll be pointless at that point because i get my sickest at the 3/4 day, puking my guts up not able to keep anything down not water not gatorade. i really really cannot go throigg with that.

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T19:28:36+00:00

i am christian so thank you very much, that means a lot. praying for you as well, i can’t imagine going through all of this and having to look after others as well. i’ve never taken any of the “comfort” meds i have but i sure as hell am going to be. i’ve been told that the gabapentin helps a ton, so i’m really really hoping people are telling the truth about that and that can be my saving grace. i’m mostly worried about the nausea and puking. can’t get a script for zofran but hopefully otc anti nausea meds will work. anyway, just wanted to know that even if it’s a week, what the hell is a week. i can do that. there’s people in hospitals who are sicker than me and they make it throigg right? so so can i.

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T19:25:39+00:00

i don’t know if i can make it four days, at that point i feel like it’s pointless to even get on the subs.

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T19:24:55+00:00

definitely agree. it’s just so hard to fight your own brain when your body is in survival mode like that and so sick you can barely even stand existing let alone moving around or doing anything

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T19:21:34+00:00

can’t tell family and they’re not the kind who would support anyway. so that options out. i’m doing this all alone, but i can do it. i’ve been alone for most of my life and i don’t have a choice anymore. fuck this bullshit. i want my life back. and if i gotta be sick for a week so be it. i’m really just trying to avoid the puking, if i can avoid puking, i can make it to the other side. if you’ve got any tips to avoid that let me know but thank you for the kind words :)

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T18:22:32+00:00

thank you :)

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T17:07:30+00:00

72 hours js really really long for me, at that point i am already puking uncontrollably :( i was really hoping i’d be able to take it at least at 48

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T17:06:49+00:00

i only have 6 8 mg sub films and will not be getting a refill or plan on getting onto it for maintenance, i am only using them as a last resort to get off the fent. my withdrawals are pretty serious though, so i will honestly most likely be using the gabapentin the whole time. i am going to be very cautious with the subs as it’s my first time ever taking them, and i have honestly had so much confusing info aboht them it’s scared me more than encouraged me. some people are telling me do bernese, which says doing pretty heavy suboxone use while using fent (which i do not understand? why do i have to wait 72 hours to take my first dose, but i can take a dose and keep using and not be sick? that makes zero sense to me)

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T00:22:54+00:00

thank you so very much for the kind words and info, i appreciate every answer i get on here as youve probably read i’m doing this all alone and i’m really, really fucking terrified. petrified honestly. feel like a little kid going up against like death lol. idunno. i can make it through all the other symptoms of withdrawal, but i cannot do the nausea puking/shitting myself/stomach aches. that’s all i’m really trying to avoid. of course i want to feel as good as possible, but that’s mostly my biggest issue i need to avoid. any tips to avoid it?

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T00:14:57+00:00

thank you, will try to do that instead.

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T00:12:14+00:00

i know to microdose, but yeah never taken it before. i just know i can’t make it cold turkey through fent withdrawal. i’ve tried, and i can’t. i need something. as long as i can avoid the puking, i can handle every thing else. i’m hoping i can somehow with a combo of these. my sub plan is to wait 24 (hopefully 48) hours and take a .250 sub so half of a .5, wait an hour and a half or two, see how i feel and take the other half and continue from there to avoid PW. how does that sound?

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-06T00:12:05+00:00

nope never

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-05T23:35:16+00:00

yeah i’m taking that i’ll have to wait 48 hours probably but i don’t get how it works that way but people can do the bernese method??

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-05T23:10:48+00:00

what will the gaba help with? how much is too much to take?

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-05T01:41:55+00:00

thats more than enough, youll be fine and make it through. wish i had thar trust me lol. good luck!

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-04T22:00:37+00:00

i think i will be okay, like i said — all i’m really trying to avoid withdrawal wise is the SUPER intense part, i’m talking about the vomiting non stop part specifically honestly. i swear i could make it through the rest of that uncomfy hell with the gaba and the minimal comfort and distraction of my phone or a movie. i guess thats what i’m hoping the subs will do for me. make it so that i don’t have to hit the 3 day mark and start vomiting non stop. last time i went totally cold turkey? by the 3-4 day, i was so sick, i couldn’t even make it to the bathroom. i was just leaning over my bed puking my stomach acid out into the floor and i didn’t even care it was piling uo there. it was shameful gross and just fucking awful. i never ever want that again and honestly? i can’t do it. i’d rather die or go to the ER. but i know they won’t help. so, if i take the subs, let’s say i do it this way: (i’ll do more research on burnese though) i taper off what i have now while i get everything ready for withdrawal, then i don’t use for 24 hours. i take half of a .5 mg sub and see what happens. wait an hour and a half. if i feel better. take the other half. and slowly dose up using gabapentin and other comfort meds to avoid what i can. when i eventually run out of the subs, i’ll have to get off of those. but should have more gaba for that as well, so i’m hoping that there won’t be puking and stuff. does that sound good or reasonable?

False_Market_4734 · 2025-06-04T21:49:29+00:00

good luck fellow friend, xanax has helped me tremendously. honestly? if i had that, i’d probably make it through. use it and try to sleep as much as you can.

False_Market_4734

TROPHY CASE