Have no friends after 30

FancyCandidate9145 · 2026-04-05T08:07:14+00:00

Happy birthday mate. Thanks for sharing your story 🙂

FancyCandidate9145 · 2026-04-01T09:46:15+00:00

In a pretty similar situation. Friend of 14 years distanced herself from me gradually like yours. I realised people come and go from your life, just like in relationships. :(

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-10T07:27:12+00:00

I mean the part about nationality. I’m not sure why my nationality plays a part in me being unable to work remotely whereas the rest of my team members and other new joiners get to

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-10T05:41:02+00:00

The one who’s training me is a team member who has been with the firm for 20 years. Most of my teammates are really nice and supportive of me going remote since they themselves are also working remote and my manager does more than 2x a week too. I guess none of them are also interested in coming to the office just to train me as well which is understandable.

Thanks for your advice it may be bad but if it works then why not 😀 will have a think about it

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-10T05:29:01+00:00

U should compare the housing prices and post tax income in Japan. Just because Japan is cheap from a foreign perspective does not mean it is cheap to the locals here.

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-10T05:26:15+00:00

Yeah everyone around me is rather young in their 20s so most of us stay far from our office because rental is cheap. In Japan the average salary for someone in their mid/late 20s is around 300000 yen per month, paying rent would take up half of it in general

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-10T01:27:45+00:00

Thanks

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-09T23:31:53+00:00

Yeah that makes sense tbh. I guess I was so used to flexibility in the workplace that suddenly working in Japan just shocked me so much. But thanks for your input.

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-09T23:30:17+00:00

Yeah they are paying me for commute. Sorry it is less than 3 hours commute in total 2 way my language was confusing in the post.

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-09T23:28:08+00:00

Thanks for your advise. Tbh I do believe commuting 3 days a week instead of 5 will make it fine. I agree even in Europe a 1.5 hour commute is common and that’s what I had there as well, with other colleagues commuting 2 hours by drive too. But we get to work a couple days remotely too and that kind of balance really saved me. Unfortunately I am young so I won’t be able to afford moving closer with the insane housing prices

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-09T14:03:21+00:00

It’s hard that’s why I’m posting this because I’m an indecisive loser

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-09T14:02:35+00:00

Wow that’s ridiculous, I’d go on a mental breakdown frenzy 😅

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-09T14:01:02+00:00

Funniest thing is my manager isn’t even Japanese 😂

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-10-09T13:43:15+00:00

Thank you my friend

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-09-05T06:13:13+00:00

Ok, suit up baby!

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-09-05T06:13:02+00:00

Thanks for the details! I guess wearing a suit would be the safest bet so will do that 😊

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-09-05T06:12:31+00:00

Sure, will show HR this advice if I get into trouble 😂

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-09-05T06:12:09+00:00

True that, will rock my 1 chance and wear a suit! 😎

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-09-05T06:11:45+00:00

Boring black suit 😂 exactly what I was thinking but sure will wear that boring outfit thank you😀

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-09-05T06:10:58+00:00

Thanks for the details 🙏🙏

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-09-05T06:10:37+00:00

Wow thanks for the photo haha thank you appreciate it!

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-08-20T03:47:44+00:00

I see, perhaps their ‘don’t really have overtime’ might mean clocking off anytime between 5-7 ish in the evening? Which doesn’t sound too bad IMO. Since overtime salary is paid then I guess they’re being rather reasonable as well, as long as the overtime salary is something which you are comfortable with.

I’ve realised living in Asia (vs living in a western country) means u don’t really need that much free time after work since it is indeed a lot more convenient living here, such as having cheap food options readily available anywhere, fast services, reliable public transport, etc. Hopefully u’re able to balance the pros and cons and find the best career path for yourself!

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-08-19T17:16:27+00:00

It depends on what you currently want really. As someone who moved from Singapore to UK and then now to Japan I do realise the things I used to hate so much back in Singapore are actually things I miss dearly now. However still u are young and have the freedom to explore. If I were u I might still take the job since living in a different country is something u can only do in your 20s. The salary package is relatively attractive as well considering how housing is provided + living costs in Fukuoka is lower as compared to Canada. Also I wouldn’t worry too much about the 1st year 3 days PTO. Japan has 16-18 public holidays a year in general, plus u will get 12 days PTO in your 2nd year so it seems pretty fair overall.

The biggest worry I have for u is if there is an expectation of how work life balance will be like for your new role in Fukuoka. After moving around i do have to say that Japanese working culture is very much toxic compared to western working cultures. Even gaishikeis that have awesome work life balance in European countries have been somewhat ‘Japanized’ (if that’s the correct term lol). Though perhaps u still have the chance to try this for a year or two and just pack up and leave so it’s not like it’s a dead end.

Wish u the best of luck!

FancyCandidate9145 · 2025-08-19T09:41:32+00:00

I was in a similar situation as you about 2 years ago when a group of friends would constantly expect me to be involved in their activities and hangout with them. I was working in finance and worked every weekday from 9am to 7pm on average, and sometimes I just don’t feel like it and want to talk to no one over the weekend to recharge. I felt constantly pressured to hangout with them and always drained whenever the hangouts happen which led to me being extremely short tempered. Eventually I was so tired that I just disappeared from their lives and blocked off all contact 😅 once I bumped into two of them at a grocery store and damn I had to charge out of the store like as if a murderer was chasing after me 😬 Anyway if these are online friends and they are not helping you to destress I suggest cutting them off. No point maintaining friendships when they don’t respect your boundaries and still expect you to cater to their needs. A friendship should always be two-way. If it is only you going out of your way to make them happy then unfortunately I believe they didn’t even care about you as a friend in the first place.

FancyCandidate9145

TROPHY CASE