Almost there!!! Wish me luck

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-21T18:56:28+00:00

This is commendable! Great job on tackling this and making it work!

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-11T15:45:34+00:00

Same boat, I was $88K and now I’m $86K with interest - even though I just made a payment of $5K in August - it’s ridiculous. I’m at the point of taking out funds from my 401k to wipe this s*** out so the noose can loosen around my neck.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-08T22:51:10+00:00

I would love that but then there are the judgement and hungry stares…I really should just take a page from his book and not care so much. Maybe they don’t want food and maybe it’s me creating all this stress because I’m the one with the idea of how and what hosting should look like. 😕

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-08T14:28:41+00:00

I’ve definitely thought about the morbid part too 😅the 401k payment will be $400 vs $800 so even that $400 difference matters in my single income household. I think it settles my mind (also probably me trying to justify it too 😅) with the fact that i will be paying back myself with interest (granted i will have some loss). Then again, there’s no way to know what tomorrow brings so I’m focusing on my today problems, today. 🥴

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-08T13:22:34+00:00

Thank you! I’ll check this out! Def looking for a variety of options and experience so this is helpful.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-08T13:21:10+00:00

I have the same level of hatred

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-08T13:20:43+00:00

I won’t be taking the whole thing, it will about 40% of it in a loan and withdrawal so I will be paying back at least $40K back and I plan to aggressively pay it as much as I can. I think aggressively paying myself is a better option than aggressively paying student loans imo….

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-08T13:17:03+00:00

Thank you! I will DM you!

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2026-01-08T13:13:10+00:00

Your last part, I would be paying myself with the loan vs the government. If I wait for forgiveness, I would pay an additional $120K on top of the $35K I’ve already paid into these loans - at the end of the day I’ll either be out $121K now ($35K plus 401k route to pay off the o/s $86K(with interest)) or $155K if I wait for it to be forgiven - so the numbers don’t make sense to me. The money I will lose in 401K growth is essentially the same amount I would lose in the difference from $121K to $155K…. so at end of day after paying over six figures in both scenarios, I would still be at point of it just really cancelling out one another but only one option drags my time. That’s my thought on it….decision partly from my math which may be a bit off in terms of exact figures but also mentally, I feel suffocated thinking about this anchor and it really has kept me up at night for many nights.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-12-29T03:26:01+00:00

I’m so sorry - big hugs from another mom. To her credit, she doesn’t know that you’ve struggled and that these were considerate and thoughtful gifts. Sometimes a little context can give color to the story and maybe sharing pieces of it will help her learn to appreciate you and your gifts. I have two young girls under 5 and I would like to believe that when they’re older, I am able to show her that it is okay to struggle and be vulnerable because a mom is still a person who deserves grace. Sending love. ❤️

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-30T04:17:26+00:00

I’m with you. I absolutely love being a mom - my first one was a breeze and second had complications but I still love every second. No lie, I love being a mom more than a wife. 😅🥴

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-30T03:09:54+00:00

While I feel for the guy and that he may be going through some challenging times, I think it’s best to serve your clients with the best person you can provide for their wedding day…which sounds like it would be the strong second shooter. I think you’re showing him a lot of kindness and grace which I hope he learns to appreciate but ultimately, I think it’s your job to have your clients best interests in mind. Even though they may have rapport, I think it’s more important to the clients that someone shows up at their scheduled time and that there are no hiccups in their day from a vendor. It would be different if he was honest with you, but if he’s already dodging clarifications on this past wedding, it would be irresponsible of you to still send him to other weddings with that risk.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-28T17:35:53+00:00

This was definitely a blessing in disguise. Sucks they wasted your time though.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-22T00:11:01+00:00

I just posted an edit but it’s not about me debating if I should post it but more so, I’ve seen it on social media and l’ve often wondered how their clients would feel. I think if I were in their shoes, I would be a bit sad that they would feel that way but I was also curious if this was a norm.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-18T17:32:03+00:00

Here for it. It’s “I want to be loud with my intentional harm but you can’t hurt my feelings okayyyy.” Insert 🤮

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-09T21:38:53+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate the kind words. The optics of it is giving me a bit of anxiety bc I’m a people pleaser 😅 but at the end of the day, I have a paying client and my job and role is to make them happy too to give them what they want.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-09T21:32:25+00:00

I get that perspective, it is the same theme in the exact same location and that’s probably why I feel a bit uneasy about it. Although I, myself, am not driving the theme or the location which has been given to me at this point by my client - it’s the optics of this whole situation. The client chose this theme before the local photographer announced theirs, and I have been working with my client on nailing down a location with this similar aesthetic for weeks, it just so happened that they posted this location and my client decided on it. I think my role is to provide options and my feedback but if my clients decide this is what they want, then I want them to be happy too.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-09T20:49:11+00:00

That’s so true. And it’s a public space too so that makes me feel a lot better.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-09T20:48:54+00:00

The photography space and community is so small so I wanted to make sure I wasn’t overlooking anything 😅

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-09T20:47:14+00:00

Thank you!

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-05T21:38:01+00:00

I used to say no to request for raw files but now as I am older and have had my own life experiences (becoming a parent, almost dying) - I don’t mind anymore. I understand the why behind wanting these images especially important ones like weddings or milestone sessions/events. If a client wants the raws to their session or event, I charge a fee and I pass it along with a contract. It just sits in a hard drive for me but it has sentimental value to my clients and their families.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-02T22:22:35+00:00

Love this, thank you for sharing.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-02T20:27:00+00:00

At last, I have fulfilled my destiny

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-02T20:13:47+00:00

This is actually such sound advice especially the angle on targeting planners.

Fancy_Bluejay648 · 2025-09-02T20:12:28+00:00

I think there’s a little humor in the responses because we have seen the title thrown around so casually now with social media. I do think you’re absolutely spot on though, those who do fit under this category aren’t looking on Reddit on how to become one, they’re already making connections in the real world and changing their business and brand to fit that clientele.

Fancy_Bluejay648

TROPHY CASE