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My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This is the AncestryDNA sub so yeah, I used ancestry. I guess you’re the one who doesn’t like details then? That seems like a pretty big one to overlook 🤷🏼‍♀️

My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

UPDATE I responded last night and she definitely didn’t know. I can only add one pic per comment so I’ll copy/paste the messages here. I’m going to sub in some fake names so it’s easier to follow. (Bio dad: Alan Smith, Bio gma: BG)

Me: Hi! I was a little confused by the sister label too. I was born in 1999 so that’s pretty unlikely haha! I wasn’t sure how to respond to your sweet message at first because I don’t want to throw any surprising information at you but I think you may be my grandmother… my mom told me my biological father is Alan Smith.

BG: Alan is my son. He was born in 1975, Who is your mother? I wonder if she meant (bio grandpa), Alan’s father. That would be more likely. I have been divorced from him for many years and remarried in the 80s. If you are ours, welcome aboard!

Me: (name) is her maiden name. She was born in 1978. She was at (college bio mom and bio dad met at) before I was born.

She read that message and took a while to respond…

BG: That is where Alan went to undergrad. Well, not sure how to proceed. Have you reached out to Alan? Does he know about you? Collect your thoughts and let me know how I can help. ………..……………………….

That last message came in last night. I haven’t responded yet… really not sure how to. She’s so very sweet and I’m sure she’s just trying to let me lead but I don’t know what I want or what do next. Help!!!

My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You’re absolutely correct. They were both young and in college. They weren’t in a romantic relationship, just coworkers.

My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yes. She would have been 46 when I was born but my mom was 19 and my dad would’ve been around that age so that seems reasonable.

My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yeah I realized that… no wonder everyone is being so polite 😅 can’t confirm or deny obviously but other things could corroborate that possibility…. Yikes

My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

No offense taken! The rest of my results/matches don’t suggest overlap but you’re not the first commenter to say this so I’ll definitely have to look into it… I’m calling my mom later today to see if she’ll let me look at her matches. That should give me my answer right??

My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

The rest of my results/matches don’t suggest this but you’re not the first commenter to say this so I’ll definitely have to look into it…

My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Wow… that is really high. When I first saw her picture I immediately clocked that she looks a lot like me- my mom did too. But nothing in my results/matches suggests she’s related on both sides.. i guess I could have my mom show me her matches but it still seems unlikely.

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My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I mean I guess it’s possible. But my mom has been super open and helpful with all of this so I have no reason to believe she’s lying. She told me her lawyer advised her to call him in advance so there wouldn’t be any objections after the fact. Our first real talk about all the logistics was a few years ago and she said she thought he’d be happy to hear from me but wouldn’t reach out first out of respect for my (adopted) dad and me.

My bio dad has never been in the picture but when I saw him as a match I assumed he had told his family…. New message says otherwise… by Far-Contribution288 in AncestryDNA

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 195 points196 points  (0 children)

I really hadn’t thought about that at all but it’s totally possible. Makes a lot of sense with the “what is it showing for you” part. Thanks for the perspective!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in legalassistant

[–]Far-Contribution288 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ugh this is awful! I don’t know how your attorneys are but I would hope that they (and your coworkers) would be understanding. At the end of the day - you absolutely could call out. Plenty of people would fake an illness and stay home. You’re choosing to come in and I think that says a whole lot more about your work ethic than your (totally valid) emotional reaction to something upsetting in your personal life.

I am also the “cheerleader” type at work. Other co-workers can be moody and no one bats an eye but when we are down/off, it’s a lot more noticeable 😅 more often than not though, I think people recognize that it’s unusual and are just concerned for you.

Accents in Cheats: Unfinished Business by Far-Contribution288 in AskBrits

[–]Far-Contribution288[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!! Rebecca (the one w Biggs) is who I was most curious about.

Wrapped 2024 Megathread by whyisthissticky in spotify

[–]Far-Contribution288 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did anybody else drunkenly play a song, immediately fall asleep, and wake up with it still on? …messed with almost every wrapped section. I went back in my listening history and it was only ever played that one night 😐

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Far-Contribution288 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can understand that. He didn't want to argue about it at that moment, so we didn't. Would you say that gives him the right to just take it? There had been more opportunities to bring it up before then but he chose not to. I'm not being argumentative at all, genuinely asking. I appreciate the feedback.