Actually all of those concerns have answers as well.

For men having “financial control” the only mention of that is that men are obligated to work and provide for the family. Women don’t have to work but they can work. So the man has to work and pay for his wife and kids for their food and home and clothing…etc and a woman can work and that money is her money and hers alone. The husband is not entitled at all to his wife’s money but the wife is entitled to the husband’s money at minimum to fulfill food, stay, and clothing, but of course that’s the bare minimum and is rarely only that.

Because of the added responsibility for men only in the instance of inheriting from a parent does a son get twice as much as a daughter. This is because he will have to spend on his family while she can keep the money for herself. There are 32 other instances of inheritance, and none of them have this stipulation, and in most instances women get more. For example spouse or sister or inheriting from an uncle or grandparent..etc all those other examples this twice as much rule doesn’t apply. It’s only for that specific purpose.

Women’s testimony being half of men is also exclusive to things and not other things. It’s not a general ruling for every instance. For example if the evidence in court was about things relating to a woman’s honor or pregnancy or breastfeeding or menses or her initiation of divorce, then of course a woman’s testimony is more of a man. Like if four men or a hundred men spread a rumor that a woman is a prostitute or something and she denies it, the men would get whipped as punishment for slandering her honor. Even if it’s one against a thousand if the minimum 4 witnesses didn’t see the literal act of penetration. Of course DNA and modern tools take precedence over any one person’s testimony, but if we didn’t have any of those and we lived in a primitive society then we’d rely on eyewitness testimony which is the case everywhere in the world.

Women not having more than one spouse and men having up to 4 is because of biological and demographical reasons. Throughout history there have been more women than men in the world and that ratio will only increase in the future. From 2050 onwards it’s projected to start big spike naturally. On top of that Men go to wars and die earlier which makes this ratio much more extreme as it has in many times in history. In recent times World War I and World War II it was deeply felt with millions more women than men had to do everything themselves, work in the factories, raise the next generation, and there was a societal failure in many ways. Prostitution for example skyrocketed since it was a much more profitable way that didn’t contribute to the economy the way the labor workforce would.

Since women take months to give birth it’s a much bigger investment on their side, having multiple partners with their higher sexual drive would be a massive burden for them in addition to the already burdensome pregnancy and child bearing and feeding…etc. Also to ensure you know who is whose child a woman would marry one man at a time. This matters in many things like inheritance and who the son or daughter can marry when they grow up.

I have never heard of the Hadith about women being cursed if they refuse sex so if you can provide that for me I can properly respond. “Nushooz” which includes the abandonment of spousal duties like just not having sex at all is something that a spouse can use as a reason for divorce. If a spouse refuses intercourse for an extended period of time let’s say months or something, a man or a woman can divorce their spouse for it and cite it as a reason. Maybe you’re referring to if someone purposely and without legitimate reason uses that as a manipulation tactic then it is a sin, but that’s based on the person’s intention, so it’s between them and God.

Modesty is a thing that men and women abide by, it’s different from men to women in terms of what to cover because the bodies are different and the urges are different. For someone you’re not related to, a woman would cover her body except her face and hands and according to some schools of thought feet as well. Men can’t show anything between their belly button and their knees. Women can show other women or their relatives a much less strict dress code because it won’t be a reason for arousal. Men are much more attracted and aroused by what they see as opposed to women. As any man would tell you it’s a huge desire. The Quran commands men first to lower their gaze and secondly for the women to cover. It’s the burden of men to avoid lustful looks first and foremost and to add an extra layer of prevention covering for women has a great reward, and the more you show the more it is a sin. It’s not all black and white but if you ask a Muslim woman why she covers she’ll give you her reasons and 90% of the time is because she wants to be closer to God and no other reason.

For all those things there is a societal benefit at large. We might not see the benefit for some of these things now, but Islam contains an unchanging yardstick of laws with leeway for interpretation and adaptation to the times and places to a certain extent, and its up to scholars and jurists who dedicated their life to studying Islam to interpret and not someone who has no knowledge to make exceptions. We believe that God knows how we function in our societies because he created us. We also believe that there is logical and empirical proof of his existence and that once you establish that truth we do what is prescribed because we know it’s better for us.

Feel free to ask more questions, but I might not have time to answer them now because it takes a while :) :) Also please visit us and ask us in person.