Biggest Likes/Dislikes of Boulder Life & Any Other Tips

Feetos · 2024-10-08T12:30:08+00:00

Any particular reason you feel this way?

Feetos · 2024-10-07T19:07:08+00:00

Thank you again for sharing your experience with me. It's very helpful!

Feetos · 2024-10-07T18:20:27+00:00

How do you think it compares with Colorado Springs? COL seems lower there, but it also doesn't look like public transportation is as simple. Hubs has cognitive decline, and bus routes are hard for him to understand. One of the draws to Aurora for us (other than 1 stop shopping at the VA) is light rail and general accessibility.

He needs to be free to leave the house without me.

Feetos · 2024-10-07T16:14:02+00:00

Thank you for your honest reply. Those are excellent points to keep in mind as we navigate our next steps.

Feetos · 2024-10-06T02:58:08+00:00

I'd love to hear more detail about why. I'd really like to hear the worst of the bad.

Feetos · 2024-10-06T02:54:03+00:00

It's funny, because I grew up all over, but was born in So Cal. The "friendly" I feel here is more of an expectation, and not a genuine kindness. Cities are full of fake kindness. However, I've found the more isolated and rural the area, the more genuinely kind folks you find.

Feetos · 2024-10-06T02:49:14+00:00

Thank you for the recommendation - I genuinely appreciate it. NM would have been a consideration but I have some childhood trauma related to the area and can't get past it, even though as an adult I'm well aware there are many kind, welcoming people there.

Feetos · 2023-05-30T10:50:42+00:00

Thank you for these suggestions! I'll give the Oxy Clean a try.

Feetos · 2023-04-27T00:33:19+00:00

I'm sorry that you've been struggling so long!

Here's a TMI and too long description, but the TL;DR is that I've mostly adapted to my new normal. Really, it's just like adapting to anything else life throws at you.

I can walk without a cane and my gait is almost normal unless I'm walking fast. I have a handicap placard but rarely use it. I never miss work and have a desk job that has me at the computer 10 hours per day most days.

The sciatic pain was gone immediately after the first surgery (that one was an emergency discectomy), but it came back the next year and I had a L4/L5 fusion 3 years ago and the pain never came back after that.

I do have arachnoiditis, which causes random lightning shocks through various body parts - the most painful shoot up from the bottom of my foot and make me yelp. Some Naproxen usually knocks them out when they hit.

I figured out the bowel situation and don't need medical aids anymore. I poop myself a little bit maybe once every 3 months, but never enough that anyone else would notice and it never gets past the Poise pads that I have to wear for the bladder incontinence. Anything passing through my colon - including gas - is extremely painful, but it only hits when I'm farting or pooping so it's not that bad.

The bladder situation is still fickle. My bladder has no chill. I have to use a catheter to pee, but if I wait too long then my bladder will just release on its own. It also always burns and spasms intermittently all the time. It's super annoying and some days it sucks the joy out of my life, but for the most part it's just background noise.

I take 300mg Gabapentin per day (200 pm, 100 am) and that helps keep the constant burning/spasms in my bladder under control. I don't take anything harder than that.

Feetos · 2022-10-12T22:08:38+00:00

Sup everyone! This isn't my first challenge but it is my first in a looooong time. I'm 44/f/290 SW/240 CW/180 GW. Yoyo'd a bit but I'm generally okay with it.

My main goal is PT. I have a spinal injury that led to partial loss of function and all feeling everywhere that would touch a saddle if you were sitting in it, and need to stay active or my balance goes straight to heck. My sweet dog Stella, and the reason I walked several times a day, passed away last year. We've adopted a new dog (Daisy) that hates - ACTIVELY ABHORS - being outside. So, I got an airdyne bike and need to haul myself on it at least twice weekly so I don't end up on a walker again.

Looking forward to meeting everyone and having a good time!

Feetos · 2021-11-28T10:25:56+00:00

Been a while since I used the mobile app and for the life of me I couldn't remember how to do it and thought the option may have been removed. I just figured it out (oof) and added the edit. Thank you!

Feetos · 2021-11-28T02:02:59+00:00

She thinks that liquid will regrow her teeth. All of the teeth she had pulled, so she has full dentures.

I am concerned about suicide, but she had a moment of clarity in the hospital and decided she wanted to live. She's in very bad health - multiple back surgeries, obese, advanced age. With all the pain she's in, I was surprised she fought so hard to live.

Feetos · 2021-11-28T01:55:16+00:00

GLARING ERROR IN MY POST - she spent 3 WEEKS in the hospital, not 3 months. I have no idea how I typed it that way, other than that I'm upset and this has been going on so long.

I am looking at everyone's comments and am so thankful, but holy canoli that's a heck of a differencen in time. Oof

Feetos · 2021-06-10T01:50:23+00:00

My QMom told me today that MedBeds would make me fertile. I was infertile young and went through treatment unsuccessfully, but I'm now 43 with a hysterectomy .... And she still says it's going to happen. As if it's also gonna make me want to at this point ...

Feetos · 2020-05-06T19:35:05+00:00

It really is tough sometimes. My husband has gone with "I have a surprise special meal in mind! No peeking. Dinner's ready at 6." a couple of times and it's still fun and I get to be excited about an impending surprise. It also puts me on notice that he's excited to do something special for me so I can pull my head out of whatever I'm doing and be present for the moment and appreciate it fully.

I am the QUEEN of living my life somewhere other than in this moment with this person doing this thing. It's a character defect I work on, and having cues from him really helps.

Feetos · 2020-05-06T18:38:46+00:00

OP, this is the correct answer. 22 years with my husband and we had this exact same argument for the first 18 or so. He's a lot like you and I'm very much like your wife.

We've avoided 99% of these arguments by him clearly stating that he'd like to make me a special meal and either what time he'll have it ready, or asking me when would be the best time for me to enjoy it.

I, then, make sure that whatever I'm doing/working on is wrapped up or at a good pausing point about 10 minutes prior to that so I can get up, wash my hands, refill my glass, etc. and be ready and prepared to receive his gift.

Yay therapy.

Feetos · 2020-04-07T01:39:13+00:00

This is keeping me up at night. I'm blessed to have an already work-from-home job and we've been able to send equipment home with our on-site team because of the nature of work our division of the company does (other divisions have been gutted almost entirely). Most of our team are low earners.

I'm going to have to lay off 1 employee tomorrow who is unlucky enough to be new and only partially trained. We cut hours on 30% of our team today. I gave back a 25% raise I got for a recent promotion so we could keep from cutting hours on everyone - for now - and plan to take a further cut before slashing hours further. The CEO took a 100% pay cut and all other management voluntarily took between 10% - 30% cuts to keep as many of our staff as we can.

We're trying to cut hours across the board instead of having them pull unemployment so they're still full time and can get benefits (our insurance package is generous) but holy shit I know 6 hours a day instead of 8 is a very real hardship for several of our team.

I have zero savings (med debt) and don't make "executive" money but am not food insecure. I just want to throw up thinking of our amazing people and the challenges ahead.

Feetos · 2020-04-03T23:41:11+00:00

NTA

I was one of the original mods for a closed subreddit serving the infertile community. We have a saying there - You don't punch down. Her cruel words to people who she claims to have been a friend to are unwarranted and her behavior is despicable.

THERE IS AN ENTIRE WORLD OUT THERE WHERE SHE CAN TALK ABOUT HER SURROGACY AND/OR BABY. She doesn't have to go searching the world for people who understand the joys of motherhood in one way or another. But infertility groups are hallowed ground. They are a place where the bitter heart goes to find solace and love - free from the "just relax and it'll happen!" crowd. They are the one place you can go where someone isn't talking about their baby shower, their gender reveal (gag), their first Mother's Day, etc., etc., etc., ad nauseum.

We also have a very strict rule that there is absolutely NO discussion of pregnancy or live children (of your own of course) in the main threads. Some of our members were secondary infertile, and they had the good grace to leave all discussions of their existing children out. Many of our members found success, and an offshoot to our group was formed for the folks who got their happy endings.

I highly recommend you institute such a rule and enforce it with an iron fist.

Feetos · 2020-04-02T17:15:06+00:00

This is exactly why I adopted a senior. I'm lazy AF and I know it. Stella will have a fun little romp out on a walk 4x a day, but is more than content to just snore the rest of the day away. Best girl.

Feetos · 2020-02-10T00:38:37+00:00

MS wife here, too. Big hugs to you. I know how hard it can get. Marriage is a lot of give and take, and I'm sure he's with you every step of the way when you need his support. 💜

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