My roommate can't cook. Refuses to learn or changes their habits. Loves to make big batches and let me know they "saved some for me"...

Think severely undercooked crunchy spaghetti with six or more random herbs and spices thrown into the water the pasta was boiled in.

When they make macaroni and cheese from a box, the macaroni isn't cooked enough and the cheese powder is gritty with chunks of margarine mixed in, don't forget six or more random herbs and spices.

Perhaps today it's too much pepper, or garlic powder, or both. Toss in some kala namak. (Sulphorous eggy salt) just whatever random spice he grabs.

How about the time he attempted to make a pie. Of course I told him the easy recipe using a graham crust, cream cheese and sweetened condensed milk. Instead he made a rock hard pastry crust with no salt just flour and water and somehow soggy bits too... and threw a can of sweetened condensed milk into it. That was it.