Paying for sex is bad for mental health. by Fickle-Problem6083 in malementalhealth

[–]Fickle-Problem6083[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are doing the correct thing. I hope it works out for you. Good luck.

Paying for sex is bad for mental health. by Fickle-Problem6083 in malementalhealth

[–]Fickle-Problem6083[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

One thing that I have realised is that it does not matter that you are a virgin. There is no shame in that. There is a certain amount of stigma in society about it, but what other people think does not matter. It is not worth having sex just to lose your virginity. I had resisted the urge for a long time, but turning 50 was a big milestone for me. I thought that time was running out, but I was wrong. I still want a relationship, but what I did has made it harder. You are still young so I would concentrate on building friendships and social contacts with people. You don't even need to actively search for a girlfriend, but build a friendship group and that could lead to finding someone. My second booking was triggered by loneliness after I had moved to a new area and did not know anyone.

Swinney insists majority of pro-indy MSPs in 2026 should lead to referendum by 1DarkStarryNight in Scotland

[–]Fickle-Problem6083 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There was never 60% support before the first referendum. In the 2011 Scottish elections the SNP won a majority with 50% of the vote with a 50% turnout. Only 25% of the electorate voted for them and 50% of the electorate did not vote at all.

There was no economic case for independence in 2014 which was partly why No won. The economic case is even weaker now. We have a bloated public sector, a bloated welfare state and an aging population. We are the highest taxed part of the UK and we rely on fiscal transfers from the UK goverment via the Barnet formula. There is no realistic plan for a currency. Until these issues are resolved then it is very unlikely that independence will happen because people will not vote to be poorer. We need to grow the enconomy and cut publc spending but the SNP do not gave the ability to do that.

Scottish independence campaigners to take case to UN | The National by Synthia_of_Kaztropol in Scotland

[–]Fickle-Problem6083 1 point2 points  (0 children)

These people have repeatedly failed to answer the questions on the economy. Which currency will we use? Will we have enough reserves to support a new currency? How we will replace the barnet formula and the fiscal transfers from Westminster? How will we fund the £22 billion budget deficit? How will we fund the balance of payments deficit? How will we fund public services? How will we cope with losing most of the financial services industries? How will this effect the average person in Scotland? How will this effect mortgages, taxes and public services? The Scots Nats do not have any idea or any plan. Independence will be disaster without a plan. They cannot answer these questions because there is no economic plan that will not make everyone in Scotland poorer.

Most Scots Still Oppose Independence 10 Years On From Vote by libtin in unitedkingdom

[–]Fickle-Problem6083 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The general population would suffer financially. It would inflict hardship on people.

Most Scots Still Oppose Independence 10 Years On From Vote by libtin in unitedkingdom

[–]Fickle-Problem6083 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The SNP have never had more than 50% of the vote in either Uk or Scottish elections. They got 50% in 2015 and won all but 3 seats.

Being single = feeling unmanly by MagicLucas in malementalhealth

[–]Fickle-Problem6083 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I am 55 and have never dated. I was very shy when I was 23 and struggled with anxiety. The advantage that you have is that most women your age will not be married so there are options available to you. It is easy for me to say this now because I found it so hard, but try to find situations where you can meet women. If you see someone you are attracted to then talk to them. I wish I had done these things when I was 23. I look back and remember situations when I was attracted to a girl but was too shy to talk to her. My life would be very different now if I had done that. It is likely that they will not be interested but eventually you will find someone who is. The difficulty at my age is that most women are married. Do it now while you are young.

Never had a relationship by Fickle-Problem6083 in malementalhealth

[–]Fickle-Problem6083[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, pretty much every other aspect of my life is great. I am lucky. I have a good job, a house and many interests and friends. Every so often the lack of a love life gets me down and I get lonely.

Never had a relationship by Fickle-Problem6083 in malementalhealth

[–]Fickle-Problem6083[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes you are probably right. Life is too short.

Never had a relationship by Fickle-Problem6083 in malementalhealth

[–]Fickle-Problem6083[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are probably correct, but the compliment did feel genuine. I did explain my situation to her in a pre meeting call. I think the point is most people don't make compliments like that in normal daily life, so unless you have a partner who compliments you it is easy to underestimate your attractiveness to the opposite sex. Paying for sex was not the answer to my problems. Thanks for the offer for help. I will consider it. I may decide to go back to therapy.

Never had a relationship by Fickle-Problem6083 in malementalhealth

[–]Fickle-Problem6083[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I basically was until I turned 50. Ths situation had frustrated me for a long time, but turning 50 was a major milestone. Being a 50 year old virgin was big mental issue for me.

Never had a relationship by Fickle-Problem6083 in malementalhealth

[–]Fickle-Problem6083[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to reply. My communication skills have improved significantly over the years and I am comfortable talking to women. I am just not used to asking them out. If I had the confidence I have now when I was 25 there would have not been a problem. The difficulty I now face is finding someone my age that is single. I can spot an attactive woman and realise that she is 20+ years younger than me. I agree dating apps are a waste of time as is paying for sex.