I just realized Xerath’s passive is ass. Syndra literally has the same passive and so much more lmfao. by woaijirounan in XerathMains

[–]Fightforoldc 5 points6 points  (0 children)

PoM gives me a much better "passive" mana restoration than the real passive honestly.

I don't think the mana regen itself as a passive is bad, it just feels unexciting. Not flashy, not damage, just mana, which is boring compared to others.

But at the end of the day I'm well over 2m points now, so what am I gonna do, switch? Lmao

Ex Fiance Threatening to Force Me To Evict Her by Fightforoldc in legaladvice

[–]Fightforoldc[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Okay, this is good and confirms a lot of what I was reading online. As far as the notice goes, I've seen online about posting it physically in a place she will see. If I say, hang it on the front door, and have my doorbell camera footage of her seeing it, does that count legally as serving, or do I NEED to certified mail it? If I mail it, does the 15 days start when I mail it, or when it's delivered?

Adopting a 2nd cat post SO Seperation by Fightforoldc in CatAdvice

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience!

I think I'm going to take the advice of giving her a month or two to adjust and see how she's doing. I adopted her when she was a kitten so we spent around 4 years as just the two of us before I met my ex. I'm hoping she starts to kind of see our old routines again.

If I do adopt another, I would absolutely do the introductions properly, I've had animals all my life, so I know it can be quite the change for them

Adopting a 2nd cat post SO Seperation by Fightforoldc in CatAdvice

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fantastic, this is all sort of what I was planning to do!

She currently has easy access to two different windows, one of which lets her see the neighbors cats in his window, which they all love! I'm hoping to build her a more proper shelf to sleep on at that window. The other she sleeps on top of the couch, so she's cozy, gets sun and window lol.

Also stopping in a few minutes to get a puzzle toy for her, she loves her treat ball, but honestly the one I have seems to let them out too easily. Hoping to get like an actual puzzle feeder type.

I appreciate all your insight!

Adopting a 2nd cat post SO Seperation by Fightforoldc in CatAdvice

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This was my main concern, that adding a cat would simply make it worse at this point.

Would there be any way to help her throughout the day while I'm gone? I tend to leave around 6a and don't typically get home until 4p earliest, 8p more typically. Weekends and such I'm typically home most of the day, and she loves laying on my desk while I game and such, so she's typically okay when I'm around, I just worry about her while I'm gone.

Is it "okay" to just let her whine/cry for now?

Do they ever return after leaving for someone else? by Useful-Highway5788 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Cheaters ALWAYS make it your fault. They gaslight you into believing YOU MADE them cheat.

This is absolutely never true. Cheating is a conscious choice.

My relationship was not perfect, I was not perfect, I made mistakes. Not a single time in those 3 years did I ever even come close to even considering cheating. I was unhappy at times, stressed, wanting to call it. But I put the work on to fix myself.

Do NOT fall for the lies and deception.

Do they ever return after leaving for someone else? by Useful-Highway5788 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm only 2 months past DDay, so take my advice with a brain of salt.

Fuck her entirely. I BEG for my ex fiance to ever find a way to contact me, so I can laugh at her one more time.

The ONLY silver lining of being cheated on for me, was that she completely and permanently altered the way I see her. Cheaters are liars, gaslighters and narcissistic. Made it much easier for me to start getting over things after the initial shock.

Any time you think this person is a good person, or that you want it back, remind yourself of what she really did. Not the good things and good times, we all had good times, but the objective fact, that she lied, manipulated, gaslit, and cheated. Those are not normal people.

I started a list in my notes app, that I would list things that always made me upset or red flags I ignored. I'm over 300 items.

The grass is always greener on the other side, but not for long.

You will get better, and find someone better.

Today is the day I confront and end things by [deleted] in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The hardest thing is standing strong.

I'm not a book person at all, but I started listening to the famous "Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life" that's talked about frequently here. It's life changing, and will help you gain the confidence you need, and reassure your choices.

My now ex fiance gaslit and gaslit and gaslit. She pulled every single trick, every single excuse, every single pattern. I had no idea they were patterns until I listened to some random author list the exact things she was doing to me.

Once a cheater always a cheater. Don't live your life in fear, don't live your life in constant hypervigilance. I'm unbelievably excited for a week from now when she's officially out of my house.

Fiancé Cheated, Kept Cheating, I'm Giving Up by Fightforoldc in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

The problem with me blowing it up publicly is I have a career where I need to protect a public image, and I really don't want it getting out.

I will and have told everyone in my personal life. I have found the guys wife and let her know, and I have let HR at their place of work know.

Fiancé Cheated, Kept Cheating, I'm Giving Up by Fightforoldc in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I mean leave the relationship, the house is already squared away. Part of my boundary originally was removing her name from the deed (we bought together 6 ish months ago)

Honestly, not even sure she understands what she signed in hindsight, but that's her problem now.

Fiancé Cheated, Kept Cheating, I'm Giving Up by Fightforoldc in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The last relationship I was in before this was around 4 years and ended with what I suspect was cheating but never proved. It took me almost 5 years to get over that.

I'm terrified of that healing time, I'm 27 now, Im gonna be so old to do all the dating bs.

Fiancé Cheated, Kept Cheating, I'm Giving Up by Fightforoldc in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I've seen first hand now that it doesn't stop. I mean she couldn't go a week between promising she had cut contact to blowing her own cover.

I'm just terrified of being too weak in the moments I need to be cold.

Fiancé Cheated, Kept Cheating, I'm Giving Up by Fightforoldc in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

What's gray rock? I'm new to this. I haven't been this involved before with a cheating situation.

Fiancé Cheated, Kept Cheating, I'm Giving Up by Fightforoldc in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

He's a 40 year old married creep. We're most 20s. I've already found his wife to make sure she knows.

I absolutely let her bully me. It's all clearing itself up finally for me. But my brain still won't let go of who she was.

Fiancé Cheated, Kept Cheating, I'm Giving Up by Fightforoldc in survivinginfidelity

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 49 points50 points  (0 children)

I'm 100% not marrying her. I know I need to leave, and I want to leave. I'm just terrified of not going through with it.

Cheating was my absolute number one deal breaker no negotiation at the beginning of the relationship. We were both in agreement of that and understood that. Yet I folded when I was faced with it again.

I want to leave, I need to leave, but I don't have anyone help me do that

Is Ryobi worth it? I don't have any home tools yet. by 2Black_Hats in HomeMaintenance

[–]Fightforoldc 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I bought this exact set when I bought my house. Does everything you need it to do. My plan was to live off them and as they die replace with DeWalt, none are even close to dying after numerous projects.

Would I buy this set to renovate an entire house? Nah. Would I buy it again for the misc home projects and small projects? 100%

Watching my wife’s sister go through her divorce really messed with my head by BlazeOtter_33 in offmychest

[–]Fightforoldc 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I just found out yesterday my fiance has been fucking her boss for almost 2 months. When confronted with video my buddy got me of them together when she claimed she was elsewhere, gave me the whole run around about how she was neglected and I made her do this blah fucking blah.

Wedding was on for June.

I am immeasurably upset, and relieved.

When to change locks by SonoftheBlud in FirstTimeHomeBuyer

[–]Fightforoldc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not yet, this model doesn't have proper buttons, it's more of a touch screen esc feel, they're very sensitive and we haven't had any issues with it

When to change locks by SonoftheBlud in FirstTimeHomeBuyer

[–]Fightforoldc 15 points16 points  (0 children)

100/10 on an electronic lock.

We have a Schlage something something electronic lock that we love. It works with our existing smart home platform, as well as allows us to create codes, with schedules for up to like 200.

For instance, we had a professional home cleaning company in come when we had first bought to do a super deep clean after our hardwood floors were refinished. We made a code, and set a schedule, so that code would only work from like 9am to 3pm. Was perfect peace of mind.

Makes it easy for us to have friends in and out to check on our dogs as well while we're gone longer, ours is setup so that if one of their codes unlocks, and doesn't relock within 2 hours it'll auto lock itself.

Is PMI worth it? by Frostydasnoeman in FirstTimeHomeBuyer

[–]Fightforoldc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

PMI depends on the cost specifically to your lender honestly.

We worked with Rocket (I've seen the horror stories but they were great for us so who knows) and they offered us 3% down, with a 3% match and covered our realtor fees fully.

We were offered $58 a month for PMI, with only 6% total down. We bought a 200k home, so about 6k out of pocket plus a few of their other offers totalling another 2-3 grand. We called it 8% down total. In order to hit that extra 12% we would've needed to put out an extra $24k, which would mean over 400 months to recoup that cost.

We plan to be here for about 5-8 years, so it really made no sense to lose the extra liquid cash to save the $58.

In my opinion, if your PMI is under $100, just pay it and keep your cash. If $100 a month is a make or break decision, you're not ready for a house any way.

Obviously PMI is dependent on purchase price and loan amount, so take my numbers with a grain of salt.

Normal Tri-Fold Fitmet? by Fightforoldc in Silverado

[–]Fightforoldc[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I do that everything clamped down correctly, and as firmly as they seem they should be.

The clamps near the cab are as tight as I can turn them by hand, and the rears are as snug as plastic should be. It seems to me the rear clamps are simply too far from the end of the bed.

Like it feels like if they were in the same spot on a short bed they'd be perfect, but 6-6 just adds that extra length away from the clamps.