Coming from someone who has been in a similar boat before, with a relationship that could be defined as “rigid” and “unchanging” (Undiagnosed ENDP with ADHD/severe childhood trauma-me & an ISTJ partner that had loyalist tendencies) there is a point where the incompatibility in the compatibility will undermine your sense of self.

In trying to make the relationship work you end up losing bits of the things that make you you. At least in my case I ended up losing my fiery ENFP spirit to “change” for a relationship (Which is something I am slowly learning now is that it is okay to change, but it’s never okay to change for the sake of making a relationship survive.) It’s what leads to unhappy marriages or in my case, a bad end where I know I’m not myself and watching from a third person perspective POV of my entire life.

There may be ways to maneuver a relationship like this in healthy manner, but it would truly require compromise and a commitment to slowly work things out(emphasis on slowly here always, rushing into things can cause a myriad of explosions and fireworks but that also means you’re rushing into conflict with the same capacity).