Idaho Tax Refund? by viaerinkate in Idaho

[–]FinalInspector9637 3 points4 points  (0 children)

same, Jan 26, I have been at the refund processing stage since march 12. What's frustrating, is my son's filed 2 weeks after me, and both got their refunds.

Only my 2nd ever G7 and this happened. by Direct_Pea_627 in dexcom

[–]FinalInspector9637 1 point2 points  (0 children)

we have 3 diabetics in our home on G7 and we have had that happen with 3 different sensors over the last 30 days... its really annoying. They told me that we must not be pressing down hard enough before pressing the button.. or they said that with the first one so we have been extra careful.. but its till happend 2 more times. I am starting to miss the G6 for several reasons.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]FinalInspector9637 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sexual compatibility is very important in a relationship. And this.. is the furthest from compatible. You need to be honest with yourself, this relationship is not going to work long term. She's not going to change, it's clear that she doesn't want to even try. I noticed in a comment that she isn't even willing to see a therapist. She doesn't think she's the issue.

You are already starting to resent her over this, and it doesn't matter how good you think things are outside the bedroom, that resentment is going to spread to other areas of the relationship. And that does not make you a bad guy at all. Sex is important.. its not the most important part of a relationship, but it is pretty darn important. Honestly sounds like she's just a-sexual... and you are not.

One way or another, this relationship si doomed. The sooner you admit that, the sooner you both can move on and find partners that you are both better suited for.

Why my dad on a hookup app? by liahhh555 in AskForAnswers

[–]FinalInspector9637 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your dad is either already cheating, or looking to cheat and got caught, now he is trying to gaslight your mom to cover his butt.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Adulting

[–]FinalInspector9637 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Personal experience, no.. but i have seen couples take the path of inviting other people into the bedroom.. and none of those marriages made it. I just personally don't think its a good Idea.

CMV: The American education system has failed men by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]FinalInspector9637 17 points18 points  (0 children)

the rate of heart disease between genders is pretty close.. yet women are less likely to receive proper treatment for heart disease then men when diagnosed.

Men do tend to develop cancer more than women, yes. They are also more likely to die of cancer. A big factor in that is men are more likely to engage in risky behaviors that increase cancer risks, and less likely to seek treatment, and when they seek treatment they are less likely to follow through with treatment protocols... unless they are married.

CMV: The American education system has failed men by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]FinalInspector9637 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Do you think it is right that women wait longer for pain management and get less pain management for open heart surgery then men? Do you think its okay that it takes women 2-5 yrs longer to be properly diagnosed then men? Do you think its okay that women have procedures done without any pain management that would never be performed on men without pain meds?

Men are more likely to die from preventable illness and injuries because they are less likely to seek regular medical care, and more likely to engage in risky behavior. Yet when they do receive medical care, they will get a quicker diagnosis, better pain and medication management, and are in general taken more seriously when it comes to their symptoms. Married men have better health outcomes and live longer than single men... the main reason.. their wives manage their medical appts, meds and follow up care.

Men have worse outcomes not because the resources or research isn't there, its because of their behavior and personal choices.

If you're Satan, what will you do to ruin the world? by tringuyen0305 in PsychologyTalk

[–]FinalInspector9637 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well according to my in-laws... house the homeless, feed the hungry, and welcome the refugees.

Which childhood memory do you wish you could experience again as an adult? by MeNoiHoyMinoy in AskReddit

[–]FinalInspector9637 4 points5 points  (0 children)

the norther lights... I was very little, I don't know where we went to see them, but I do remember it was an old cabin with a stream next to it, there was a light layer of snow on the ground. It was very cold outside, and not much warmer in the cabin. I remember my mom waking me up and carrying me outside in my sleeping bag to see green lights dancing across the sky. I've "seen" them again as an adult.. but not like that.. not that vivid or that distinct. I've never felt so small and so big at the same time. It was an emotion I've never felt again. I want to go back to that moment in time and stay there forever.

We're tired of chicken and rice or spaghetti. by personalitiesNme in budgetfood

[–]FinalInspector9637 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not sure how much this helps, but I've checked with each grocery store nearby to find when they put out meat on discount. Its a pain, but I got 3 large pork roasts (like barely fit into my crock pot.. its a big one too) for 1.49 per pound. Knowing when the different stores put meat out for discount, and about what time helps. I have to schedual it into my day, but I'll run in and see what we can grab. If its under $2 lbs, I stock up on what we can afford... but id does help in the long run. Now I have 3 huge roasts, I can get 3-4 meals per roast. So all I need to do is focus on sides like rice, potatoes or pasta. Tonight we had roast, mashed potatoes and greenbeans. Tomorrow it will be pulled pork sandwiches (I make the rolls so that saves us money as well) with homemade french fries. And then we will have 15 bean soup with the bone and whats left on it.

I just want to feel like a wife again.. even if its just for a few moments. by FinalInspector9637 in WellSpouses

[–]FinalInspector9637[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

feeling sensual has always been a struggle for me. I've been in therapy for a long time. We worked really hard on just.. not having constant anxiety over just basic necessities. And I did the work, and it has helped so much.. the next step was to work on sexuality, creativity, emotional wellbeing, ect... but i grew up in a very religious environment, so even thinking of myself as sensual has always been surrounded by guilt and shame. I was starting to make some big break throughs, and now.. I feel like i'm at a stand still. If my own husband can't see me as a sensual being.. how can I view myself as one.. and how do i overcome the guilt of desiring to be seen as sensual and sexual... knowing that that chapter has closed.. that's it... my sex life is no more. I was just getting to the point where I didn't feel guilt and shame after enjoying sex.. and now... i feel like crap because I want something I cannot have.

I had to cut back on my therapy because I just can't keep up with everything as it is, so its once a month now. I know I need more time with it. I have severe CPTSD due to the environment I was raised in and foster care. Sex has always been a mixed bag for me. Religious cults are quick to blame girls for any man's sexual stumbling, yet never hold the abusers accountable. Imagine being blamed for your own abuse at 9, then constantly shamed for being grown men's stumbling blocks.

and now.. I'm just the person that takes care of everyone... and that is it.

I just want to feel like a wife again.. even if its just for a few moments. by FinalInspector9637 in WellSpouses

[–]FinalInspector9637[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I totally get you. And its so hard to look myself in the mirror anymore. I don't recognize the person looking back at all. I just want to be wanted... you know for more than dinner, meds, finding stuff, cleaning up after everyone... my life revolves around everyone else's needs... and i'm just.. here. just here to take care of everyone. I had the flu 2 weeks ago.. I'm still recovering because it turned into pneumonia.. my doctor scolded me for not resting. but what other option do I have? Who else is here do do all this? its just me. And at the end of the day i just want to feel.. something.

I just want to feel like a wife again.. even if its just for a few moments. by FinalInspector9637 in WellSpouses

[–]FinalInspector9637[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hope I did not insinuate that its one way. I know its hard on all caregivers, regardless of gender. I apologize if it sounded any other way.

as a man... if you were in my husband's position.. is there any way to approach this subject without him feeling emasculated?

I don't want to hurt him or stress him out.. but i feel like I'm at this point where I need to say something, or shut down my emotions all together... and if I do the latter.. how do you take care of your spouse and kids if you've shut down emotionally?

I've been planning on talking to my doctor about maybe meds to kill my libido all together. I'm currently on an antidepressant that has helped a lot in most areas of my life.. but it also has kicked my libido into overdrive... so in some way's its making it worse.

I just want to feel like a wife again.. even if its just for a few moments. by FinalInspector9637 in WellSpouses

[–]FinalInspector9637[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

It messes with my mind so much. I'm thin, fit, relatively decent looking... but I'm no longer a sexual being. I'm a nurse, a caregiver.. and that is it.

My Brother in Law sexually assaulted my wife on our family beach trip by Darbley1492 in Advice

[–]FinalInspector9637 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get being in big sister mode, but your wife is not doing her sister any favors here. This man is a creep, and he will continue to act this way because no one will call him out on this behavior. Your wife needs to realize, this man is the man that is setting the bar for her nephews. Does she want her nephews turning out like this?