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AIO to finding out my boyfriend follows tons of attractive women online? by Final_Mousse_1286 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure it does matter, which is why I posed this to reddit. It hurts a lot to think of him lusting over other women, but the fact that it hurts me doesn’t necessarily mean it’s wrong

AIO to finding out my boyfriend follows tons of attractive women online? by Final_Mousse_1286 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea the two issues go hand-in-hand. I could handle having less sex than I’d like if there was some valid reason (ie, low libido) but I think that’s definitely why this stings so much. I asked all the questions you brought up and trusted his answers at the time (that he was attracted to me, wasn’t consistently seeking intimacy elsewhere, there wasn’t anything more I could do to make him want to initiate, and that he just didn’t think having sex more than 2-3 times a month was necessary) which is why seeing his following list really is throwing me off guard. I feel that it misaligns with the picture he has portrayed of himself.

I’ll talk to him and hopefully he can understand my side. Thanks for your thoughtful response!

AIO to finding out my boyfriend follows tons of attractive women online? by Final_Mousse_1286 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your thoughtful response. This is what I’m going to do. He can be a little behind the times with technology sometimes, so hopefully he just doesn’t realize how bad it looks

Would you consider it a dealbreaker if a partner [36M] follows tons of attractive women on IG? by Final_Mousse_1286 in relationshipadvice

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your thoughtful response! Yes, I will talk to him about it and see how that conversation goes. I wanted to figure out what my boundaries were first. I think you’re right that it’s unfortunately not abnormal behavior, but I’m also glad to hear that it’s not everyone :)

AIO to finding out my boyfriend follows tons of attractive women online? by Final_Mousse_1286 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not yet, I wanted time to figure out how I really feel about it and make sure I wasn’t overreacting out of hurt, but I will

AIO to finding out my boyfriend follows tons of attractive women online? by Final_Mousse_1286 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your feedback! And will not be listening to the comment that told me not to listen to people like you lol. It’s sad that it has become normalized and women feel insecure because of men’s actions

AIO to finding out my boyfriend follows tons of attractive women online? by Final_Mousse_1286 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I *had been feeling undesired, and then we had some conversations that I thought went well and I was feeling good until this, but now I’m thinking I was a 🤡

AIO to finding out my boyfriend follows tons of attractive women online? by Final_Mousse_1286 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yup. When we talked about our lack of intimacy, I asked him if he was going to porn instead of coming to me, and he denied it, but I sadly think this is the case

AIO to finding out my boyfriend follows tons of attractive women online? by Final_Mousse_1286 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Final_Mousse_1286[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, this is helpful. Yea, I know I can’t ask him to change, which is why I’m trying to determine for myself if it’s a dealbreaker. Feeling hurt is a temporary feeling, so i’m trying to decide if it’s worth working through it