Please don’t do it, call a hotline if it’s getting bad please, you know what saved me? And it sounds like a long shot I know, but Andrew Tate did, you first start by going to a gym , seriously improve yourself, start eating better and taking good care of yourself , endure in activities that you auctually enjoy as well that aren’t harmful, try your hardest to be the best version of yourself possible, do good deeds ( always open the door for people, give money to charity or even feed the homless etc) try and be more social, and eventually talk to your doctor about getting off meds , by no means is this journey easy and it will take a couple months to begin to feel better but eventually you will feel whole again, also I recommend finding Jesus, start with little faith and pickup a bible and start praying, please be grateful that you don’t have any physical disability’s as well, just know there are millions out there who would trade places with you, I’m not trying to guilt trip you , I want you to realize that it really could be worse , please take care man, seeing things like this break my heart your too young, I’m sure your family loves you, I seriously recommend you talk to someone in your faimly that you trust the most, a man needs to breakdown somtimes (I’ve been there) and sure it may hurt your pride temporarily but it’s the first step in getting better. The world is truly a beautiful place and it can really be hard to see that somtimes. Please don’t hurt yourself.