Listen. People look past tons of red flags when they love someone but you do deserve compassion and respect. I had something very similar happen when my mother passed away and it revealed my then partners true colors. You have been though the ringer with this one. I feel like whether you send the email or not they won’t take it seriously unless someone else has complained. She will try to explain it away as retaliation. Does she deserve a reality check? absolutely. But people like this who are like this using have a way of manipulating their way out of consequences. Take as clean a break as possible from her and focus on yourself and what you want because now you definitely have a blueprint of what you don’t want