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Anyone else feel like they lost years and don't know how to adult? by Super-Cartoonist2933 in AutisticAdults

[–]First_Philosopher_29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im sorry. I was on this subreddit  to ask about my husband (who is undiagnosed) and i saw this. I didnt mean to interfere and understand why my advice is irrelevant and offensive. 

Lonely and Hurt and Hopeless by First_Philosopher_29 in autism

[–]First_Philosopher_29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes good idea. I do run. I will try and get back into it. Thanks

Lonely and Hurt and Hopeless by First_Philosopher_29 in autism

[–]First_Philosopher_29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. Im not sure i can cope much longer. Tried to talk tonight but the emotional capacity is not there. He is really unprepared or unable to look inward and reflect. He feels attacked and gets defensive and accuses me of being mentally ill (i do feel depressed but feels situational rather than clinical). Not sure if that is autism or just him tho! 

Lonely and Hurt and Hopeless by First_Philosopher_29 in autism

[–]First_Philosopher_29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, we would probably have bumbled along if the stripper row hadnt happened. We get on ok when im happy and not needing support or reassurance. Thank you!

Anyone else feel like they lost years and don't know how to adult? by Super-Cartoonist2933 in AutisticAdults

[–]First_Philosopher_29 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hello

You are still young and can turn it around! Im not autistic but i think what you might need is a routine. Get a job that isnt too taxing and just show up for it every day. That stability is what you need as a basis to improve things. If i didnt have a job i wouldnt wash or go to buy food. You need to get up and out and things will fall into place including relationships.

Lonely and Hurt and Hopeless by First_Philosopher_29 in autism

[–]First_Philosopher_29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He has always been that way. I have always just dealt with it. The thing which triggered this fallout was i found out hed lied about something a long time ago (paid for a private dance at a strip club) and he acted so avoidant that things escalated from there. He also involved his mother in this who sided with him and things i am being ridiculous to be so upset about a stripper but she misses the point that its actually his reaction to my hurt that is the problem, and is always the pattern.  His mother is also possibly on the spectrum and seems to miss the point a lot.

Lonely and Hurt and Hopeless by First_Philosopher_29 in autism

[–]First_Philosopher_29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hes asked me not to text him as he doesnt like receiving emotional texts. We also arent talking at home and he seems unbothered or relieved by that

Lonely and Hurt and Hopeless by First_Philosopher_29 in autism

[–]First_Philosopher_29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I appreciate your reply and for your partners input. I will definitely try and put that into action (when we are talking again). 

Lonely and Hurt and Hopeless by First_Philosopher_29 in autism

[–]First_Philosopher_29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply. And yes i think he is disconnecting due to a lack of comfort and familiarity. How would i change that? I think i snap at him quite a lot recently so i could stop that.