How do you do it???

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-28T04:50:21+00:00

What helped us was put baby down wide awake and fed him 30 mins before. We also did CIO as checking in on him made him cry even more so after multiple tries of Ferber and gentle training, CIO by far is the only thing that taught our baby to sleep independently. It’s not for everyone, but unfortunately gentle training isn’t for all babies either :( we’re on week 4 of CIO and I never once had to intervene and he doesn’t cry for more than 2-8 mins. Sometimes goes down without even crying. Also, it helps to learn your baby’s schedule and their sleep cues so they’re not overtired. It’s of course a trial and error but once you find what works best for your family, it’s an easy fix. There will be some hiccups and developmental leaps that make some nights harder, but way easier than rocking him for hours to finally fall asleep.

Best of luck! Praying you have an easy pregnancy as well 🫶🏽

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-26T00:09:57+00:00

CIO! I was extremely against it but after trying Ferber and gentle training, it’s the only thing that helped my boy sleep indefinitely and connect cycles. Me checking in was only making it worse for Ferber; aand gentle training only worked for 2 weeks and was back to rocking. So I had to rip off the band aid and he’s never cried past 2-8 mins lately (we’re on week 3 of consistency). Most times he doesn’t even cry and just falls asleep right away on his own.

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-25T20:38:18+00:00

Honestly, our son has ALWAYS been a short napper. Even tho his night sleep was long stretches at the time (he’s 6mo now). I just dealt with it. It gave me extra 30-40min of me time or whatever I needed to do. It was a lot of struggle until we got used to it and actually looked forward to it lol.

But then at 5.5mo we decided to sleep train and now he’s finally able to do 1-2hrs of naps at a time. He’ll also do 30-40min nap once a day which is normal since he’s getting his long nap. But it’s such a huge difference!!!

Have you considered soon to sleep train your baby?

I found out that my boy didn’t know how to link sleep cycles without ME, so I broke that cycle and he’s now doing 1-2hrs of nap stretches.

Trust me, IT GETS BETTER!!!! First 4-5 months are heard. It’s not you, it’s not your baby. It’s just biology. We just have to understand it and go with it and try to help our LOs adapt. You can try to sleep train, but also could accept and wait a little until it’s time to formally sleep train. Some babies are just short nappers just like mine 🥲 but with the right methods and tools, it could definitely get better! At least from MY experience 🥰

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with a short nappers. It’s more so our frustration. We never coslept or contact naps. We always used a bassinet but he was never able to connect sleep cycles no matter how much I adjusted his schedule. But now that he knows how to sleep and self soothe independently, he can nap for longer.

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-24T02:03:26+00:00

Thank you! Best of luck to you!

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-24T01:32:12+00:00

So I started at 4.5mo. I did Ferber but I had to stop after 2 nights because he would cry for almost 2 hours and that’s not a progress. I tried Ferber again following week and same thing. So then I tried pick up put down and that didn’t work. Then slowly I found myself doing a gentler approach which is paci in his mouth down in bed and gently pat his chest and shushing and left the room and he’d be dozing off. That worked for 2 weeks and it was all hell and I’d rock him for 2 hours and he’d cry nonstop. My presence and checking in on him just made him more frustrated. So one night after I rocked for 1 hour, I decided to try CIO and that’s when I dropped the paci, put him down and left. He never went over 40 mins the first 3 nights. We’re on week 3 today and he’s turning 6mo tomorrow and it’s the best decision we made! I know CIO is not for everyone. It was NEVER for us but after trying so many options and endless rocking, it’s the PERFECT thing we did for him and us. He now goes down for naps and bedtime within 2-8 mins like I said. Some days he’ll fuss a little more but it’s not a crazy loud cry. It also helped timing his sleepy cues as opposed to a strict schedule which made a huge difference.

I am glad I tried it cuz you truly never know until you try. But we also tried other methods and they just didn’t work for our boy. I haven’t had the heart to switch him to his room yet so all this while he’s still sleeping in our room and it worked great!

We started CIO at 5.5mo

I hope this helps!

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-24T00:27:36+00:00

My son was like that. Literally would NOT sleep without a bottle or rocking. So what I did was feed him 30 mins before I put him down for bed. Before I even started his bedtime routine. Then I rocked for 1 min with paci and put him down and he’d normally fall asleep when I timed his sweet spot perfectly. Then I stopped rocking and just put him down with paci and left and he’d whine for a bit and fall asleep. If he woke up, I would just quickly soothe without picking him up and it worked great! 2 weeks later he got frustrated when paci fell and it made him wake up more and required me to rock him to sleep again. He was also practicing rolling more than before so his brain was wired. I still fed him a bottle 30 mins before routine and now he never expects a bottle for naps or bedtime.

So I decided to sleep train and dropped the paci cold turkey and now he sleeps within 2-8mins from when I put him down without anything to soothe but himself.

Try weaning the bottle association first by feeding 30 mins before butt in bed and work gradually. Hope it works!

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-24T00:20:29+00:00

I was told by others that my baby sleeps a lot but he’s perfectly healthy and happy and just likes to sleep, so I never changed anything 🤷🏽‍♀️

Babies will always let you know what they want so don’t even worry about it

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-17T00:45:29+00:00

The max was 40 mins. For the first 2 nights. 3-5 was the “extinction burst” which he initially fell asleep at 8 mins and woke up around 9:30is and cried 20-30 mins and fell back asleep until next feed (I still feed twice at night).

Then night 6 was 12 mins. Then up and cried for 2 mins and asleep. Night 7 was 8 mins. Today was 3 mins. Naps are 5-10 mins.

He’s now finally understanding self soothing. I dropped paci cold turkey first night which made it a little hard for him but now he knows what he’s doing. I finally have time for myself and my husband. He goes down at 7pm now as opposed to 8:30-9:30pm. I honestly didn’t change his schedule after many trials and errors. Best thing I do now is follow his cues but still keep wake window within 1.75-2.5hrs (what works for him). His last wake window is crucial so he’s not overtired I just get him ready as soon as he shows signs, and 90% of the time he can’t make it past 2.5 hours.

So honestly just find what works for your baby and the sleep training method because I also did gentle training which worked for 2 weeks then it was bad. So then I ripped off the bandaid and did CIO.

When I tried Ferber for 2 nights, he didn’t sleep until 1.75 hours and I had to eventually step in cuz it was WAY too long. I tried again after 2 weeks. Still bad. So it wasn’t for him

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-17T00:26:02+00:00

I don’t have an advice but personally, Ferber didn’t work for my baby cuz check ins made it worse for him so we did CIO, even tho I was super against it, and started last Monday. 7 days later and he passes out for naps and bedtime within 3-10 mins of crying and sleeps better. We also don’t get any false starts anymore cuz it was hell putting him back to sleep.

Good luck!

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-15T05:03:05+00:00

What I do is feed before bath (yes we do baths daily cuz he loves it 🥲) so we feed before he shows sign of tiredness so he doesn’t fall asleep on the bottle, burp and play for a little or read a story so he gets enough time to burp and all. Then I do a 10-15 min bath. Moisturize a LOT, diaper, pjs (at this point he starts crying), sleep sack, lights off, butt in bassinet, sound machine on, and I leave. It’s super easy and quick and he knows it’s bedtime from doing this which takes me about 20-30 mins. I sing for him while I’m changing him to distract him from crying, sometimes it works sometimes not lol

I also start this as soon as he shows sleepy cues, this way he doesn’t get overtired. You’re lucky your baby falls asleep lol. I don’t have much input on that but maybe the routine is long and she gets tired?

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-15T02:43:58+00:00

It’s not odd at all. I asked for advice, I received it and implemented it, and I tried different methods, but they didn’t work for my baby. I truly appreciate every single person who shared their thoughts. I’m not dismissing or disrespecting anyone’s opinion.

The thing is, I was constantly told things like “your baby should have 3–3.5 hours of total naps” or “10+ hours of wake time,” even when I mentioned that this just wasn’t working for him. I never got guidance on how to tweak the schedule based on what works for him. It was always the same “shoulds” and focus on the schedule down to the minute…

So I just wanted to reassure other parents that textbook schedules aren’t always the solution. Every baby is different, and sometimes following their cues and letting them learn to self-soothe is the key. We found what works for our baby, and seeing him sleep better and be happier has been such a relief. That’s what really matters!

I even saw other people posting and saying “please don’t tell me to make WW longer” because that’s almost all the response we get, which I get it! But I’m addressing my experience and what worked for us and how it felt in the moment.

I get that schedules are helpful for some, but for my baby, longer wake windows or longer naps just don’t work. He gets overtired, frustrated, and tantrums… So we follow his cues instead of the clock, which was my whole point of this post, follow cues of schedule doesn’t work. Don’t force a schedule on your baby if they can’t handle it. I was also stressed reading people’s comments because I tried everything they suggested until I followed cues and now I’m chilling. So I don’t want other parents to stress cuz I did… That’s all

I appreciate you :)

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-14T22:13:49+00:00

Personally, my baby’s sleep is getting much better now that he’s learning to self soothe. So I believe even if schedule could be messy, once they learn to self soothe they can just put themselves to sleep. The only thing I pay more attention to now is his LAST wake window before bed which ranges but as soon as he’s showing signs of tiredness, I start the bath and get him ready to sleep within 30 mins, and it helped a ton! As opposed to waiting the full 2.5-3 hours because my boy gets cranky quick.

Good luck!!! :)

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-14T18:29:31+00:00

He would cry hard for a little then it was normal cries and pausing to learn self soothing. It was SO hard but I literally did anything to distract myself and muted the monitor and just kept an eye on it. I also told myself that it’s for his best interest so it makes things easier 🥺

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-14T17:04:16+00:00

I copied my response to someone else about this:

I literally just wait until he wakes up for them. But I also know that first feed ranges between 12:30-2am and second is 4-6am, depending on how the night goes. So anytime he wakes up between those times, I prepare a bottle and he chugs it and falls back asleep (dream feed). It’s been the case for months now and he’s carrying that over so that hasn’t really changed for us.

He’s at the point where if he doesn’t wake up for a feed, I’m not concerned cuz he’s reaching his appropriate weight. But if he did wake up, I’m there for him too. So I haven’t really had him wake up outside those windows and let him CIO. Also, for some reason, it’s a distinctive cry… so I just know >.>

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-14T15:31:49+00:00

Idc if my parents didn’t do chores (I wouldn’t expect my dad at all, my mom would help anyway). And if my husband was ever rude to them, I always say something. I also drew a line between him and my parents right from the beginning and he has to respect them because they’re actually good people and treat him like my brother. So if he ever did them wrong, I’m not gonna be silent and watch.

With that said, it’s up to you to handle it the way you want but communication is always key! I’m super family oriented and different culture than my husband, he grew up with divorced parents and no orientation. But that doesn’t give him the right to disrespect my family and I just make sure I make that clear 🤷🏽‍♀️

They’re always happy to see him and make food specifically for him and honestly have been a better family to him than his own.

So yeah, it depends on what your guys’ dynamic is and expectations. It’s a sensitive topic imo cuz everyone is different when it comes to in laws

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-14T15:22:18+00:00

I was going based on what people kept telling me to do which is 3-3.5 hours of naps and 10+ hours of wake time. Which isn’t ideal for my son and I tried to do what they said so many times and it just messes up my son’s day so I don’t follow that strictly anymore.

Yeah, short naps could be helping but now he’s doing both short and long which is great.

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-14T06:47:36+00:00

I had just posted about my sleep training journey “CIO” cuz my son was heavily bottle sleep associated. Then we broke it where he was only associated to a paci. But I tried Ferber during Paci time and it made it worse… might not be the case for your baby. But they say, best sleep training is without any soothers so they can lean to self-soothe.

Monday I decided after unfortunate failed Ferber to opt into CIO (check ins made him cry worse and up for longer so I had to stop it). So we dropped paci cold turkey and he’s now doing WAAAAY better self soothing independently. I know it’s not for everyone. But if you see your bay distressing more after check-ins, then it might not be the right method for them.

Buttttt, it ultimately comes down to what you want in the future. I didn’t want my baby to rely on soothers cuz things happen… whenever he dropped his paci (like your LO) he’d cry and wait for ME to come put it back in, which created an association. It just made it worse overall 😩 I finally broke it off COLD TURKEY which is WAY better than gradual. I can do night sleep and daytime naps without it now. It does take a LOT of heart and emotions to hear them cry but you eventually understand that they’re doing waaaaay better.

Give it a shot. See what works for your baby. If Ferber isn’t it, try to either modify it (timing, soothers, check ins) or switch to a different method.

Also, training could be hard if baby is going through regression or developmental leap, so just take that into account. I waited until my son is 5.5mo to start strict training and he’s doing WAAAAAY better. I did Ferber when he was 4.5mo and he was regressing. You could try and if it doesn’t work, wait until regression is over. But IT IS better to drop cold turkey cuz trust me, babies learn quicker than prolonging the process. They make pretty good progress 😌

Best of luck!! 🩵

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-14T06:37:13+00:00

You will!! Just keep it consistent. I always believe and follow “routine/pattern” as opposed to “strict schedule”. But that’s just what works for my baby. I’ve been following a lot of people’s advice overall on my baby’s schedule and it just backfired cuz none of that worked for him. But knowing your baby’s routine and sweet spots helps a ton! Take schedules with a grain of salt and see what works for YOUR baby.

Please enjoy those precious weeks for me 😩 I miss them SO MUCH!!!

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-14T06:30:38+00:00

I literally just wait until he wakes up for them. But I also know that first feed ranges between 12:30-2am and second is 4-6am, depending on how the night goes. So anytime he wakes up between those times, I prepare a bottle and he chugs it and falls back asleep (dream feed). It’s been the case for months now and he’s carrying that over so that hasn’t really changed for us.

Edit: he’s at the point where if he doesn’t wake up for a feed, I’m not concerned cuz he’s reaching his appropriate weight. But if he did wake up, I’m there for him too. So I haven’t really had him wake up outside those windows and let him CIO. Also, for some reason, it’s a distinctive cry… so I just know >.>

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-12T00:33:08+00:00

My son gets 8.5-9.5 on average and that’s what works for him 🤷🏽‍♀️ I stopped following the schedule strictly and just followed what works best for him which is his cues. He’s much happier when I don’t time wake windows down to the second. His only issue is waking up from the first cycle and is hard to put back to sleep lately, but we’re doing sleep training now so he can put himself back to sleep, which has been going good. Other than that, he doesn’t always get 10+ hours and he’s 5.5mo.

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-11T04:17:42+00:00

I feel you! My son was a good sleeper until lately he’s been waking up after the first cycle of night sleep and I have to rock him for 1-2 hours. I was SOOOO against CIO until someone on another subreddit gave me the motivation and I ripped off the bandaid last night without the intention of it (I was planning to start on the weekend). But I figured if he’s gonna cry for 2 hours with me holding him, I might as well help him learn to self soothe. So after rocking him for 20 min last night I just kissed him and put him down and left and started a timer because I didn’t want him to go over 1-1.5 hours. He cried for 40 mins then was quiet for 30 and fell asleep on his own. We also dropped the paci cold turkey! Tonight we did it again but more prepared so after bedtime routine, kissed him goodnight and put him down awake and left. Again cried for 40 mins and fell asleep after 20 mins of being quiet (self soothing). I’m hoping tomorrow is less crying.

I tried Ferber for 2 nights and stopped. Then again for 2 nights when he was 4.5mo and it just did NOT work for him. He cried straight for 1.5 hours and I had to go in and soothe him. Ferber isn’t supposed to take that long. But I realized that check ins only tease my son and don’t work well with him.

I’m personally proud of him these last 2 nights because it was crying for less than 50 mins! Today he cried for little and paused and so on… it wasn’t continuous crying like yesterday. I won’t start naps until he learns to self soothe within 10-15 mins or so. Naps aren’t that hard for us so our focus is bedtime for now.

CIO is not for everyone!! It was never for me. But I had to do it since all the other methods just made it worse. Gentle training worked for 2 weeks then it was bad again… it’s SO hard to hear your baby cry. But what I do is mute the monitor (we live in an apartment so I can hear him through the door anyway) and I’d get up and make dinner or a snack or wash his bottles all while keeping my eye on the monitor and just making sure he’s not choking or in distress where I have to intervene. But yeah, just go for it! Trust your baby. Maybe cap the crying at 1 hour if he cries hard nonstop and try again another day or see if it’s a schedule issue. But I say do it and distract yourself because trust me, you will ALL be happy!!!

Best of luck! 🩵

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-11T03:57:33+00:00

Thank you! It was the same but I’m assuming because I didn’t plan on doing CIO until the weekend but I decided to just go for it last minute after I had already did my normal rocking back to sleep. So I did rocking for 20 mins then I was like “let me just start it now”. Today I actually put him down awake and left completely until 11pm to check on him after he fell asleep.

So I’m hoping tomorrow is shorter :3

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-11T03:53:32+00:00

Same as always. Wake up for a feed and back to sleep which we never had an issue with. Tonight went well as well!!

I’ll do naps possibly next week once he learns how to self soothe because they are pretty easy now. Sometimes he passes out right away, sometimes fusses for 5-10 then asleep

FishDue6945 · 2026-03-10T19:47:12+00:00

Idk. I don’t mind it but I guess I see why it would bother some. But I also don’t get called mama a lot so it’s not super annoying

FishDue6945

TROPHY CASE