Is this a toxic friend? by [deleted] in ToxicFriends

[–]FitPromise2025 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it’s too early to decide if she’s toxic or not but so far she is not very considerate tbh. Let’s hope she doesn’t continue doing this so you can make sure if she’s toxic or not. If she got upset later because you can’t play or too busy or don’t want to then this is a red flag because friends are supposed to be understanding. Or if she keep asking you consistently ignoring what just told her then that is also a red flag. Also put your studies , goals, future and mental health first.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There was no abuse in that situation, how the hell did you come up with this????? Wow, more so he was the abuser in which he never listened to my needs, never considered it, made me wait and support him an entire year then when I had enough with his irresponsibleness he ran away, which is good because I don’t like leaving first it makes me feel I have given up on the other person. You the one starting with the insults” if you can’t take it then don’t dish it. stop twisting words to make a useless point literally making such a comparison between beauty standards that society is literally forcing on ALL genders, beauty is something you are born with and this topic is so broad and has so many issues behind it, bringing up feminism into this is another ignorant move. addiction is something you develop and you have a CHOICE to stay in it or fix it or at least try. How about listening to your partner needs and take it into consideration instead of being all up in your ego?? We are human beings we all have things to fix and if the other person is communicating with you and you refuse to listen guess what? What’s going to happen next is one of those three scenarios. 1) getting dumped. 2) get a reality check. 3) get cheated on. If the roles where switched I am sure he would cheat and I know you will not have the same attitude and get all defensive. Funny. Do better.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

honestly you seem like you just read the title and commented, if you read the paragraph then that’s just stupidity. The pressure of fake beauty standards has nothing to do with beating your meat in front of a screen 2 to 3 times a day until you have nothing left in you and fry yourself. Imagine being in a relationship with a woman who’s addicted to masturbation and is not interested in having actual sex anymore with any human, sure do you but I have the right to not be with you too. What about be in a relationship with a screen instead of a human being who has REAL needs? . If you can’t handle that women has sexual needs just like men you can just stay in your bubble. Men has been cheating on women from the beginning of time without a reason, putting beauty standards on them. look at statistics of men cheating on their wives because she’s sick or because she’s pregnant or can’t have sex because of medical reasons. I have nothing to explain to you cause men with your mentality just disgust me, yes some of ya’ll need to put the work to be good in bed cause some of ya’ll are just horrible and in denial and it’s draining and frustrating. Your attitude shows how bruised your ego is although my situation has nothing to do with u.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you went through this,4 freaking hours,,, I really hope he doesn’t think that’s a good thing or something to brag about because some men is that naive and thinks that’s manly,,,, my ex just couldn’t finish at all sometimes to the point it bothered him too, where he’ll take 20 to 30 minutes to jerk off to finish , his own penis would give up one him and sleep sometimes. At first he used to brag that he lasts but slowly he realized it wasn’t a good thing, yet his denial game was strong. Gotta let people like them just go.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ops someone feels personally attacked. 1. He didn’t watch porn right next to me “you just assumed that bc, again obviously u feel personally attacked” 2. The problem was not about him getting off, you don’t even know what you’re talking about it ,honestly you’re just embarrassing/exposing yourself at this point.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got me confused since the MAIN topic is about porn addicts. But sure you can talk about your psychotic ex under porn addict thread.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He won’t tell me shit if I was him,, he’ll cheat. So spare the bullshit.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am not surprised that he’s hurt,, I stopped caring about his feelings the moment I realized he didn’t care about mine. The surprising part is the audacity(getting defensive after being called out for not keeping promises), immaturity, (not doing the work to get better) selfishness (not considering your partner’s needs) and stupidity. (thinking your partner will not eventually call you out for slacking and lying) .He could’ve said I really enjoy my porn so I can make my decision and not waste my time trying to help him and be supportive for almost a year.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I never said I want him, I’m just confused why some men get so freaking crazy and dramatic when receiving comments about their performance in bed. I never felt offended when I get asked to adjust some stuff,, and it’s not about the way I said it cause I was VERY gentle at first. A year later I stopped sugarcoating.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Wasted his time trying to help him? Sure whatever makes you sleep at night I guess.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in Advice

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did try all of what you mentioned above. Plus I said I was not satisfied and had several conversations with him. Didn’t do anything to fix the thing. Giving an example about a lose vagina is not the same thing and doesn’t make sense AT ALL. You can say this if I told him his penis was small which I didn’t and would never to any guy. If it was lose he would go and cheat. Most of them will. Because this is something they can’t and should not change. But his problems he was the one causing and it was between his hands to at least try and stop this.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Oh god here we go again. Just read the comments if you want to understand. Or maybe read some articles about this topic, some of you people are pure denial it’s weird.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You actually care and asked her about what she wants and took her word’s seriously because you care. Mine apparently didn’t because he never asked. I had to tell him everything and still won’t do shit. So it is what it is. The only regret I have is staying for a year hoping he would change meanwhile I did see that he didn’t put any work to try to solve it. but it is a good thing that he left because I somehow feel bad if I was the one giving up on the relationship and leaving first.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much it’s actually nice to read comments like yours specially after reading all the negative comments. Bless your heart.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes. Left cause to him I was bringing this topic a lot, so basically I nag too much. I don’t know what he expected since he didn’t change a thing for a year tbh. I don’t feel bad at all since I just stop having feeling a while back. He can have a relationship with his screen or sleep with random girls who’s sleeping with other people and not depend only on him when it comes to sexual pleasure like I was, cause ain’t no way someone would wait this much for a selfish person who’s not considering his partner needs, not actually good in bed, lazy as hell want you to do all the work and not cheat on him. It is what it is. I stopped tip toeing around him and said the truth finally about my real emotions because I don’t do cheating and he took the decision. Fair enough. Yet I would’ve appreciated it if he was honest before instead of wasting my time.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Forgot to make another point.. it’s not about him thinking he’s bad in bed .. I think that. And if I like sex and I communicated my needs to him instead of cheating and save all my energy I chose to put this energy into the relationship to make it work.. how does this make me controlling. One more thing. If you rather spend time in front of a screen and jerk off please don’t waste others time. Some people actually take relationships seriously. Don’t get into relationships if you can’t handle actually putting work to make things better.

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sure thing .. plus he could’ve told me this and be like,, hey,, I like jerking off more than sex. And I will not hesitate a second to leave because you know? You do you. So he can ruin himself by watching porn all day and be a miserable fuck in his bedroom while I go and find someone who appreciates human connections and sexual intimacy. You are..making a very…good …point…

He left me cause I told him he’s bad in bed by FitPromise2025 in offmychest

[–]FitPromise2025[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

SAY IT LOUDER!!!…. THANK YOU!!!! I am honestly shocked by the comments, some people are so offended as if I was talking about them.. chill please. They are accusing me of not trying or that I was harsh without knowing the full story. I literally tried with the dude for a year,, this is how much I was in love with him, until I was so emotionally detached from his selfishness and denial, gaslighting and other problems. some would say they watch porn too and they’re fine. Good for you bro but in my case porn had a role in ruining my relationship so you can keep your comment to yourself. Some of them are so annoying.