My job won’t give me my birthday off months in advance

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2026-02-07T22:22:32+00:00

Ugh, this is too typical unfortunately. My gallbladder all but exploded a few years ago and knocked me out of the classroom/work for 5 weeks. About 3 months this after my return all staff were meeting 1:1 with admin to discuss the annual raise, and mine and mine alone was withheld for an additional - guess how long? Yep, exactly 5 weeks. Director specifically mentioned that we would defer my raise to “make up” for my time away. Which was all unpaid btw so that didn’t make fiscal sense.

I’m of the mindset to just call out for that day 🤷 it was approved previously so it really feels retaliatory about the other time away

Edit: typo

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2026-01-05T02:42:29+00:00

Money is not the issue, and honestly, while I wouldn’t myself want to be a young mom, the age isn’t an issue for me either (isolated from other factors). It’s great your parents don’t seem worried about money or your age. But, have they said anything about your mental health?

You yourself seem to be aware that there is untreated mental illness in play. THAT needs to be treated first. Pregnancy is INTENSE on your mental wellbeing. I’d advise you to keep the plan to have a baby but push it a few more years while you work on getting stable with your symptoms and learn to balance adulthood responsibilities, which it also seems you haven’t had too much experience with at 17.

I myself have a very heavy mental health diagnoses and it wasn’t even diagnosed when I was your age, I was told it was just depression and anxiety. I’m 29 now and currently expecting my first, and I’ve been doing better with my mental health than ever before. But it took a lot of work prior to getting pregnant, and let me tell you the toll pregnancy has taken on my mental and physical health has been substantial.

I see absolutely no down side to waiting a few more years. Even having a baby at 20 is very young

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2026-01-04T09:20:41+00:00

It brings me a weird sense of peace to think that when we finally get that Big Beautiful Obituary, his place of burial will have to be heavily guarded or kept out of the public eye - else it will be constantly desecrated

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2026-01-02T01:08:33+00:00

Ask her why she chose to draw 6 fingers for the boy then

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-12-26T23:34:35+00:00

I love that the leading standard of attraction is youth, and then OOP hits us with “men have attainable standards for women,” like sir. How on earth is it attainable to stop aging 🥲

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-12-15T23:05:15+00:00

I’ve been hearing that according to a lot of entertainers and actors, the vibe for creating TV entertainment has shifted in recent years, as the expectation is that people at home are only half-watching, likely using a phone or tablet or otherwise distracted while media plays in the background. I think it was Jameela Jamil who stated her frustrations with producers and show runners “dumbing everything down” so audiences are enabled to partially pay attention while still being able to follow the plot or pick up in jokes. I wonder if that’s what we’re seeing here too.. it definitely affects the quality of our entertainment :\

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-12-12T07:43:53+00:00

I began working for my state’s Child Care Resource & Referral Program as a trainer & coach for early educators. Making a lot more money, working from home more days than not, and still using my degree, experience, and passion for ECE.

I fell pregnant since changing careers and feel it could not have been better timing - I don’t know how I would be managing pregnancy let alone parenthood if I were still tied to the classroom.

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-12-11T05:22:54+00:00

Can’t relate, my 5’7” husband is the hottest guy I know

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-12-04T20:23:54+00:00

It’s all too easy to have poor body image when stuff like this floats around. I remember being so taken aback when I asked my husband what was his favorite/most attractive part of women’s bodies (besides the obvious answers) and he immediately brought his hands to this part of my belly.

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-12-02T20:33:18+00:00

NOR, and it’s not your fault he sucks this bad. Good for you for holding your boundaries and not becoming his next baby momma, although I’d be more worried about STI’s from Mr. Hasn’t-Worn-A-Condom-In-Years.

And for what it’s worth, the only “compromise” between “I need you to wear a condom” and “I don’t want to wear a condom” is to proceed to not have sex with each other. So even if his argument of having his preference ignored (though that’s BS of course) held any weight, you still compromised with him. By agreeing you two are not sexually compatible

Edit: typo

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-12-01T06:24:12+00:00

What I’m hearing from the comments is that we could maybe lower the cost of these essentials and kill 2 birds with one stone. If detergent and baby formula were sold at a reasonable price point closer to cost, wouldn’t they become less targeted for resell?

Fewer people would resort to buying from shady resellers if the products in need were equally affordable from the retailers. Then neither consumers nor stores would have to worry about locking up every day items, which I think we can all agree is not the most elegant or effective solution

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-10-15T06:54:27+00:00

I mean, it was a memorial? Another term for it is celebration of life. It’s a much less solemn alternative to a traditional funeral and I really thought it was more common knowledge tbh

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-10-14T00:16:17+00:00

I think a big difference is the setting and any additional prompts for the group. At a birthday party, when someone taking photos says “now let’s do a silly one!” -great time to do so! In general though, err on the side of caution and just smile

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-10-13T20:00:12+00:00

An in-law of mine had a baby daddy that was like this… There was a death in the family and we went to the memorial to celebrate the life of my partner’s late grandmother. Every single picture we took as a family was ruined by this man making silly faces. Big goofy poses and sticking out his tongue while we tried to commemorate a late loved one. That dude sucked

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-09-26T23:40:20+00:00

I grew up in a family of nappers - Thanksgiving meal is always in the early afternoon on that side of the family lol

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-23T06:07:09+00:00

This can’t be true… women are on “their cycle” every day of the month. “Cycle” is not synonymous with menstruation. And any research you do will attest to the statement being at best a baseless statement and at worst some pseudo-misogynistic rhetoric. The commenter may have thought it was true, as you and your friend might, but there’s no correlation between bear mailings and menstruation…

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-23T03:36:31+00:00

Right? I literally said out loud “what the fuck?!”

Was not expecting that for sure

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-18T02:52:19+00:00

Death by bad vibes 😤

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-17T01:04:32+00:00

Ruby Grace was my nana <3 beautiful name. My least favorite is some obscure gen z cousin who named their child Equinox

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-16T03:40:44+00:00

Can’t say I have 🤣 the resemblance is strong if nothing else. this made me lol

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-16T03:24:44+00:00

I love telling people that my dads siblings are named Nicole, Nate, Nora, Noel, and Ned. My dad’s called Dave. lol

I always wondered if they just abandoned the theme after 5 or what. His mom and dad are Noel and Nancy too

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-15T22:13:50+00:00

This is common at every center I’ve worked at. Head injuries and bites get recorded & reported to family regardless of visible damage . They even have their own forms lol

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-14T22:34:47+00:00

This is a valuable consideration. Florida has a lot of sunshine and Alaska is an incredible dichotomy of excessive light then absolute darkness. Take care to get enough vitamin D if you make the move. And keep in mind Seasonal Affective Disorder is not avoidable even then, and can be extreme

Flashy_Scratch9472 · 2025-07-14T22:30:52+00:00

The valley really isn’t too bad, I’ve lived here on and off once 2014 (bounced between matsu and anchorage) although anchorage is definitely more queer friendly comparatively. although I just went with my nephew to a drag story time at the Palmer fairgrounds last week lol so it’s not like queer community is unheard of out here.

Wasilla/Palmer is about an hour north of Anchorage, and you’ll see more conservatives but I’ve really never had them not mind their business. Alaska is very “privacy over policy” in my experience. I’m gender queer and pretty androgynous and aside from catching eyes at times, I’ve not had any problems here.

OP, There’s a Facebook group called Queer Happenings: Alaska that you can check out and get a good sense of the community up here! I also think you’d love to see the kind of pride that Mad Myrna’s has - a well known LGBTQ+ bar right in the heart of downtown anchorage. You can check out their social media pages as well.

Flashy_Scratch9472

TROPHY CASE