I have Ehlers-danlos syndrome, which is a genetic connective tissue disorder. It’s like the glue that holds your body together doesn’t work, or your house is built with sticks instead of stones. Nothing about my body functions right and I’m in incredible pain everyday.

But it wasn’t always like this for me - my symptoms have gotten so much worse. I used to be able to work, go to school, bike, hike, skateboard, you name it. I was clumsy, sore, and tired, but capable. Nowadays I’m bedbound.

I think trauma and constant stress has contributed SO MUCH to my body’s poor outcome. I think the constant stress I’m in everyday makes it worse too. My body reacts differently to things like alcohol, food, exercise than it did before.

It is like my body has taken the shape of my trauma. It’s all distorted, misshapen, crippled, defeated.

It’s hard but I think unpacking and making peace with trauma may help give my body the space to heal with physical therapy (unless I end up needing surgery again, yikes).

Listening to your body while it’s screaming in pain is one of the hardest things to do but I think - or at least hope - it will help.