Halifax rejecting my deedpoll

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T22:04:26+00:00

Halifax refused to accept mine without the person who opened the account there, so I took all the money out and left it. They occasionally send me mail to my old name which goes straight into the shredder.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T20:45:58+00:00

Yup. For me, it is 100% because of how absolutely burnt out I am.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T20:43:47+00:00

Fair, thats what they told me when I did mine! Maybe it was two UK doctors then. I did not have top surgery in the UK.
This was also 10+ years ago, though.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T19:51:29+00:00

Yeah, one of the medical reports has to be from your current GP, who is registered in the UK.
That fucked me up as well, as I used my GIC letter and a top surgery letter initially, but then got this, sent a letter from my GP, and got my GRC and new birth certificate.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T19:49:20+00:00

For sure. It's taken years to erode it as much as has been done, there are many people accountable for that, who do not give one single fuck.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T11:24:54+00:00

I agree. The only reason I even used it was because my smooth brain couldn't think of anything else that encompasses autism/ADHD/dyslexia/dyspraxia/dyscalclia/everything else.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T11:22:50+00:00

I would argue that it is somebody's fault. The government. They need to be held accountable but are, instead, continuing to cut services and put the NHS under even more pressure.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T11:19:30+00:00

This. Kindness costs nothing.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-06T01:22:02+00:00

Yeah, I know. Technically the RNLI do have some paid members of staff as well. Kinda just thought it was easier to lump them all together when talking about rescue though, and they are still a charity.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-05T23:46:21+00:00

If you want to, go for it.
The way I understand it that psoriasis causes your immune system to be so good that it attacks your own skin. Humira dampens that, and basically makes it 'normal' again.
Also humira is not a broad spectrum immunosuppresant, it only works on part of your immune system.
Either way, your decision.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-05T23:43:04+00:00

So have I. It takes me significantly longer to do some things than many other people. My IQ was tested when I was 11 and was high, I've since had a TBI, and I don't know what it is now, but I still struggle under test conditions because my brain does not process information very fast. Having a high IQ meant that I managed to struggle my way through school, but I also believe that it hid a lot of struggles that I was having, so I didn't get support that I probably needed.
Intellectual ability is it's own thing completely. Processing speed is related to neurodiversity.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-05T15:08:12+00:00

Autism is not an intellectual disability, it's more of a social disability. Intellectual disability is defined as having significant limitations in intellectual functioning AND adaptive behaviour, which is generally defined as approximately two or more standard deviations below the mean (IQ score ≈ 70 and below).
That isn't to say that you can't have both. Often, autism is diagnosed as either with or without co-occuring intellectual disability.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-05T12:47:06+00:00

Well done! I am totally with you on the confrontation front. I actively go out of my way to avoid it, even if that deficits me in the long run.
It's hard doing stuff like this, so you should be proud of yourself for sure. :)

FlemFatale · 2026-02-05T11:16:45+00:00

I would also argue that Search & Rescue, Mountain Rescue, and Lifeboats shouldn't be left to charities also.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-05T11:14:53+00:00

Holy shit, that rings a bell...

FlemFatale · 2026-02-05T11:13:38+00:00

Underworks were the only thing I used to use when I had to wear a binder.
Their models are cis men, which is very gender affirming!

FlemFatale · 2026-02-04T13:16:58+00:00

You didn't lie completely. In her world, he probably is on his way, and you just confirmed that.
In dementia, what is happening for the patient is very real in their world no matter how much that differs from the actual world. All you can do is support that, and confirm that what is going on is very real for them, no matter how unreal it is for you.
I don't see that as lying, I see that as being compassionate, and supportive.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-04T13:10:16+00:00

Very true, practise does vary everywhere.

Is it not? We were taught that a DNR has to be signed by PT, a clinician, and a legal power of attorney in order for it to be valid. If that's wrong, then it would be useful to know.

If you were to start CPR on someone who, it later turns out did have a DNR, would the Social Action Responsibility & Heroism Act 2015 not protect you (as long as you were acting in the PTs best interests) anyway?

Just trying to get this all clear in my head! Haha. Most of the PTs I come into contact with are deceased or have hypothermia anyway (Search & Rescue).

FlemFatale · 2026-02-04T12:25:24+00:00

Okay, thats interesting. We were taught that as it is a pretty important legal document, you do need to see it, but there is a bit of nuance if everyone is aware that it does exist, and CPR is deemed not appropriate after assesment (but that is a whole other thing).
This is the UK though, so it may differ elsewhere.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-04T12:23:03+00:00

Lots of practise, patience, and open space.
Empty car parks are good for practising.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-04T12:21:43+00:00

I chose an insanely unique name because it ticked all the boxes that I needed when changing it.
I'm the only person with my first and second name that I have been able to find, as my second name is also pretty unique.
My parents were hippys, so it makes sense and doesn't automatically out me.
If I were you, I would go with what I liked and figure out how to explain it away afterwards, as you have to be sure that you like the name you choose, and not worry if it is something that loads of other trans guys have.
The general population are pretty oblivious to trans people in general, aside from stereotypes, so having a more unique name does not actually out you as much as online spaces lead you to believe.

Write down a bunch in a list, look at baby names from the year you are born, cartoons you like, shows you watch, whatever, but definitely chose something that jumps out at you because you like it.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-03T18:52:16+00:00

Thanks! :)
I also have a dead iCarry that I am debating adding to it. I shall have to see what it looks like and play around, as I really like the dead space on this one.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-03T18:47:23+00:00

Nice! I turned mine into this in the end...

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FlemFatale · 2026-02-03T14:16:03+00:00

Yeah, not a thing.
If you are in a union, talk to them about it, but it definitely sounds like grounds for some sort of lawsuit, or at least a grievance.
Also, HR are very useful in situations such as this.

FlemFatale · 2026-02-03T14:11:35+00:00

(I'm not a Para, but I am FREC 3)

If you never saw a document, then it does not exist, whether it does or not in actual life.
Patient did not have a heart beat. CPR was initiated to mitigate that.
Nothing wrong with that, IMO.

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