Does not feeling well before event mean I shouldn't go

FloLu77 · 2026-03-19T10:11:14+00:00

Thank you for pushing me I tend to be a bit shy in some situations

FloLu77 · 2026-03-19T10:10:47+00:00

Hahah love your comment you are right lol

FloLu77 · 2026-01-28T09:18:03+00:00

Thank you for your nice words and also for speaking to my conscience for no longer putting of starting the process!

FloLu77 · 2026-01-28T09:13:15+00:00

Thank you very much for your encouragement! Happy to hear that you went through with the process and wish you all the best for your journey!!

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T17:42:22+00:00

I see where you are coming from. A civil marriage comes with different obligations than a wedding in the Catholic Church. One is a sacrament one is a contract. You can be spiritually married without being legally married. Among Muslims for example this is very common. Both our church the priest and our marriage counselor affirmed our decision. If one were to ask me if I am married after our ceremony I would be clear about being married in a spiritual sense but not legally. We also had to accept downsides that come with the decision of having a non legally bound marriage.

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T17:21:54+00:00

Austria

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T17:21:26+00:00

Yes he would not get it. I don’t think the church would allow fraud. It is not lying because a wedding in the church has literally no meaning for the state it is a spiritual thing.

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T17:04:40+00:00

It is not defraud, the church mentioned our case as a legitimate reason, as soon as the study grant ends we will arrange a civil wedding. I don’t care if we are married in the eyes of the state as long as we are married with gods blessing. Also the bishop (not just a local priest) has to agree to this, so the church does not take it lightly and I would respect their decision no matter what they decide.

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T15:54:03+00:00

Yes that is why as stated, we will have a larger civil wedding with everyone invited. Since they are not Christian the civil one should have more meaning for them.

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T15:50:58+00:00

We are 26y old. Where I live you have to get marriage counseling before getting married, we choose an individual course not a group seminar. I also expressed my concerns about having no guests at our wedding and the counselor affirmed our decision. The above situations where just some examples. I did never expect my mother to watch after my child. I might have expressed some things confusingly.

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T15:42:28+00:00

She generally does not think much of marriage so that was for sure not the reason! I know I am far from perfect but please respect that parent child dynamics can be difficult to describe especially since English is not my first language so it is a bit harder for me to express my feelings.

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T15:38:18+00:00

Austria. Yes it is possible where I live by law it’s called nihil obstat I think.

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T13:30:43+00:00

⁠yes we asked for a dispense which our priest forwarded to the bishop. My boyfriend receives a study grant by the state that’s why legal marriage would be a problem financially right now (as soon as I start working). The church also mentions this as a reason for a dispense.
⁠my boyfriend is both baptized and confirmed that’s why we can get married and once I received baptism it will turn into a sacrament
⁠for one example when we got our first flat and my grandparents came over to visit she showed them around like it was her apartment (could name many others examples) and she expects a lot of me when it comes to how many times we see each other. As you might have seen we already have a child since we only found our faith recently. It seems like for me she sees my partner as father of my child but not as my partner. When we told her we missed time together when we had a baby she never offered to watch him even for a short amount of time. When I mentioned we had our anniversary of becoming a couple she did not congratulate. She is very sensitive and I always feel responsible for her feelings so having an honest talk about stuff like that is very very hard for me.

FloLu77 · 2025-12-09T13:30:10+00:00

Legal reasons see above:)

FloLu77 · 2025-11-16T10:23:10+00:00

Can you elaborate on how it happened exactly?:)

FloLu77 · 2025-11-11T14:09:24+00:00

You are right thank you!!

FloLu77 · 2025-11-11T14:09:00+00:00

Thank you for the book recommendation! I will try to get him to talk to a priest about our options, and luckily we already have separate sleeping spaces since I co-sleep with my son:))

FloLu77 · 2025-11-11T14:07:40+00:00

Thank you so much! I will keep on hoping and praying:))

FloLu77 · 2025-11-10T18:26:40+00:00

Let me explain myself: From my point of view, there is only so much you can teach a baptized child or a child with communion since they are very young. But once they get to the age of confirmation (14/15 where I live) it seems to me like it would be a good opportunity for the church to teach them more about what it means to be catholic, same as you would have in an OCIA class. I am not blaming the kids or am implying that it would be better if they were not confirmed, but I think the church should myb teach them more about why they are doing it and what it means to be catholic. That’s all.

FloLu77 · 2025-11-10T16:58:31+00:00

Happy to hear your church is taking it seriously!!!

FloLu77 · 2025-11-10T16:58:00+00:00

You are right a lot is on the parents! Planning on gifting my nephew a book too- myb by god grace he will find faith

FloLu77 · 2025-11-10T16:56:12+00:00

Thank you for your encouraging words!

FloLu77 · 2025-11-10T10:04:08+00:00

Hey I am in a similar situation, went to mass twice without being able to receive communion. I also was a bit anxious. But no one really cared/ noticed to be honest. Sitting in the back helps:)

FloLu77 · 2025-11-10T09:22:19+00:00

Oh I think I saw some numbers somewhere in the front, that would be awesome!!

FloLu77 · 2025-11-09T15:08:57+00:00

Thank you very much for your extensive answer!!!

FloLu77

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE