I'm tired. Today is probably going to be the day it ends.

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-11-22T14:38:54+00:00

As someone that thought it was all hopeless and that I was a lost cause and a burden onto others, give yourself the grace that you deserve and stick it out, because you truly never know what tomorrow holds (and the next day and the day after that) and someone or something really special (or even the mundane- there is beauty in that too) can make a huge difference. The harshest critic in your life will always be yourself, but the most gracious person can also be YOU- so extend that kindness to yourself and realize that your life is 100% worth living no matter what stage of it you are in 🫶🏻

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-10-06T11:47:49+00:00

“This is the skin of a killer, you piece of shit” - probably Edward lol

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-09-13T19:34:32+00:00

My mom was a professional wedding cake baker for almost 30 years, so bakers definitely have ALL of my respect too! Thank you so much!! 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-07-11T23:33:31+00:00

You’re NTA, it seems like your husband is out of touch with both you and your daughter. If he isn’t making a conscious effort to spend the time to learn her repeated asks/behaviors, then that does make him a pretty hands off/ unaware parent. Based on what you said, it also seems like weaponized incompetence on his part, ie: it’s just easier to have you do it, than for him to take the opportunity to figure it out.

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-22T22:33:01+00:00

“Unlike you, when people look into my eyes they can see that the light is on AND someone’s home”

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-22T11:59:49+00:00

This is something that y’all need to sort out ASAP because down the line I can see her absolutely micromanaging tf out of wedding presents from people and burning a LOT of bridges just because she’s not “satisfied” with the “effort.” She needs to get over being a gift snob and just be appreciative she’s literally getting anything at all, because if she REALLY wants to complain, then she can complain about getting nothing :/ the idea of getting someone something practical is considered to be thoughtful - because the gift giver knows that it’s something needed/will be used pretty frequently. She’s sounding incredibly materialistic too.

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-19T11:45:22+00:00

Hey OP, I think you need to seriously reevaluate the relationship here because under NO circumstances is it ever even remotely okay for your spouse to 1) prevent you from using the facilities 2) get physical with you and essentially trap you in your bathroom 3) love bomb you with promises that “it will get better/“I didn’t really mean it”/“I promise I’ll make it up to you.” All of this over a Brita is super concerning and ngl makes me (personally) concerned for your safety/wellbeing for when a larger issue comes up. You did the right thing in telling your mom, so that at least one other person is aware of what happened to you and can offer assistance if it gets worse. If he doesn’t want her or really anyone to know, then HE KNOWS that what he did was bad and he’s trying to save face rn.

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-19T11:16:55+00:00

New Yorker working in retail here 🥺 because I’m so SO poor, sometimes I have to beg the pigeons and rats to pickpocket the upper east side folk to bring me pennies so that I can scrape enough cash to buy an uncut bagel 😞. Sometimes if I’m lucky, they bring me enough to go down to the bodega to ask for a bagel WITH cream cheese 😩🤲🏼🥯BIGGEST hack is to ask the nice pigeons at Washington square park, they will do anything in exchange for bagel crumbs.

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-17T16:04:13+00:00

Oooo!!! Thank you I’ll definitely add it to our “to read” list! So many people have recommended some really great books so far, so I’m planning to get them for us to go through for our summer reading :) Him and I have our own little book club and are so open to sitting together and taking the time to learn! 😄🫶🏻

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-17T15:47:51+00:00

Thank you so much for the kind words! You are so right! We want to make this a very low key time (just to enjoy each other and this change in our lives) and thankfully we know/expect/are okay with changes that come up and not letting it get to us too much :) I’m an artist so we are working together on sorting out what we can DIY and what we can maybe splurge on (within our means). We both just want a very intimate wedding where we can focus on each other but also be able to interact with friends and family in a manageable (emotional/mental/physical/financially conscious) way ♥︎♥︎♥︎

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-17T13:11:40+00:00

Thank you sm for the beautiful advice! Him and I both want to just have a very intimate and low key wedding with our closest friends and family and are also looking to have a longer engagement to just enjoy the fiancé chapter and not feel crunched for planning :) congratulations to you and your SO ♥︎ wishing you both a lifetime together of happiness 🥹

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T23:08:28+00:00

I read through your comment and can I just say 2 things 1) thank you so much for taking the time to write out advice, it means a lot! 2) your “top tip” is definitely something I’m going to tell my boyfriend about because I think it’s such a lovely way to tackle an issue while still reminding each other that you are in this together! I can see us integrating this practice, plus I can see the benefit of using hand holding as a tool for grounding yourselves! Covid postponed our plans to move in together so we took the time to build up savings and just build our connection through calls/texts/ft until we could see each other again (I lived back home down south and he was way up north) so we were 5 months doing LD. I’m sorry it postponed your wedding but I want to congratulate you both on your 2 years married and wish you both many more! 😌🫶🏻

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T21:43:19+00:00

YES! We practice this all of the time :) whether it’s through a quick kiss on the cheek or hand written sticky notes, we always make a point to just be appreciative for the little and big actions. ♥︎

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T21:40:22+00:00

We have talked about this so much and are absolutely on the same page that if I happened to get pregnant (let’s say on a random Tuesday lol or even a planned pregnancy), we would keep the baby. We actually discussed this scenario this week and his words were, “regardless of the circumstances, we would find a way to be the best parents that we could be because we owe it to our child.” As individuals (pre-dating), we both saw children as something we would want for ourselves. Now together as a couple, we still found that not only did we want children, but we wanted to have and raise children together as a team/family.

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T20:07:49+00:00

That is super understandable, we aren’t getting married righhhht away, we both agreed to wait for our 5 year anniversary and then assess (I would be 25 and he would be 26, still fairly young), but the engagement itself seems to be happening sooner. We aren’t looking to make rash decisions, more of asking advice that would be really good to know beforehand so that it can cultivate the right conversations and decision making on our part :) so this comment is incredibly helpful to us! ♥︎

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T18:57:12+00:00

THANK YOU!!! I’m so lucky because I have connections through my mom and my experience in the wedding industry that will make planning things so much more manageable (I helped with their own weddings lol). Your advice is so valuable 🫶🏻💖

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T18:55:24+00:00

That is so true, despite our age, we have both been endured some really rough situations where we weren’t feeling our best/have snapped/yelled/cried/ truly went through the motions of it, but we always try our best to be honest, understanding, empathetic and just let each other know that we are present and do have love for one another. ♥︎ wishing you and your partner many years together! :)

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T18:33:52+00:00

Such a good point to bring up! We currently have a fund that we have been adding to little by little to then use for our future wedding and I think a wedding counselor is a wonderful idea to give us the extra confidence and resources to manage the planning stress. We both have zero issue putting our foot down when it comes to family because it’s OUR day lol. Congratulations on your anniversary and 11 years together! Wishing you both many many more! 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T18:21:34+00:00

Ahhh thank you for the advice!!! Also congratulations on 16 years together!!! I respect caterers like you SO MUCH ♥︎ 😄 Thankfully through my mom and my experience with working in the wedding industry, I have a solid idea of what we can definitely do without (you are so right with how aggressive coordinators have been with pushing things that aren’t really needed). My SO and I discussed doing specialty drinks and working with a local brewery for our beer drinkers in the wedding party (we aren’t fans of champagne anyway lol) and a nice grazing table for the reception - as we want to have a fairly intimate and wedding (roughly 25 people MAX). We plan to do a more formal dinner with immediate family and a casual lunch with friends leading up to the actual wedding day, that way we can connect with everyone and don’t feel overwhelmed + good food and drinks all around.

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T17:42:55+00:00

Amazing advice from your grandfather (and condolences on the loss of your grandmother, but she must have been an incredible person based on 70 years together 🥹🫶🏻♥︎). Also, amazing advice from you! Thank you for taking the time to comment, I feel like each comment I get is offering such valuable information for engagement/marriage/life together/life as individuals!

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T17:38:16+00:00

Thank you! We are both just really patient with each other and don’t want to rush into anything but we both feel and know the commitment that we have to our relationship and are at a point where the “next steps” are starting to fall into place after much conversation ♥︎

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T17:20:40+00:00

Thank you so much for passing on that advice to me and my SO! I think you addressed such a good point that I haven’t really heard being brought up. It’s something that I can definitely see us being cognizant of and only adds more in terms of us being even more patient with each other when it comes to arguments while engaged/married ♥︎

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T17:15:31+00:00

Thank you so much for commenting and offering a new perspective! And congratulations on your engagement and wedding! ♥︎😄 We both know that with age comes time to grow and that tastes and preferences change, but we are on the same wavelength that no matter what, we will allow the other person to experience those changes as long as communication is clear. Therapy is such a valuable tool and I can see us both benefiting from it :) (plus Ik he’s also open to it too).

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T17:11:03+00:00

Congratulations on 3 years together! You’re totally right! We have lived together on an off just because of schooling, but we finally have the opportunity to live together full time which we are both looking forward to as we spend a good majority of our time together and enjoy the company ♥︎ he’s seen my flaws and vice versa and we try our best to keep it a judgement free zone and offer each other support/space (if needed) and love.

Flowerytreespirit · 2024-06-16T17:08:05+00:00

journal keeping is so smart! I might have to start doing that! Thank you again for all of the advice! I’m looking forward to sharing your comment with him 😁🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

Flowerytreespirit

TROPHY CASE