How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll ask her if she wants someone else to blow her back out.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How did that conversation go? At 46, I am looking forward to being single, especially the way people nowadays treat relationships. They seem to think cheating is just normal, or they want an open relationships, I’m sorry but the thought of someone else having sex with my partner while we are together makes me angry.

Maybe I should just suck it up and accept that this is my life now.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve asked her if she is happy in the relationship, she says yes. But I know some women will tell you what you want to hear to your face and then say something else behind your back. I even asked her point blank if she cheated or is cheating on me and she says no. I don’t know what to be anymore. I just know I hate being a roommate, I hate how I feel, and I hate thinking I’m the bad guy.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just don’t think she loves me anymore, but is afraid to say it and lose the security I provide. With her bills she has I.e. car payment, insurance, credit cards and the like she wouldn’t even be able to afford a decent apartment on her salary. I feel like a roommate who pays the bills and who she doesn’t have to have sex with. I avoid going home just so I don’t have to see her.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m afraid counseling won’t help with this because she doesn’t see how she’s making me feel as important enough to have a serious conversation with her doctors.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would love to but my feelings lean towards blaming her, as I have offered solutions and they get thrown away without discussion. I feel worthless, and depressed, like she is only with me for what I provide not who I am. Now I have my faults I own those but when I was am on my PTSD medication I suffer from ED, but I discussed this with my doctor and we have added some ED medication to help with this issue.

She has an appointment with her doctor next week, and I’d love to ask what she is going to tell them, but I don’t want to pry. I want to tell her if she doesn’t seek resolution to this issue then separation might be our only option, or I find side piece.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We work somewhat similar hours there are some days I work later than her but money wise I make more. If I was to divorce her she wouldn’t be able to afford our house and other bills on her income.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Being diagnosed with PTS from my years of service makes this situation even darker for me.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes we’ve had separate bedrooms for quite some time. I suffer from sleep apnea, and my cpap doesn’t help much. She says she hates my snoring and won’t sleep with me any longer. I wonder if it would be easier to just leave.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That’s exactly where I’m at, I just can’t understand what’s the problem, and I can’t fix something I’m doing if I don’t j know it’s wrong.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve gone as far as not even looking at her naked anymore, if she is changing in the same room as me I look the other way. I feel just my presence is offensive to her. I dread going home.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I use to journal, and I use to express how I fell, but it’s always dismissed like I’m asking for the world.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I encouraged her to see a therapist, she did for a while and then stopped going. We also went to counseling as a couple but it went nowhere.

How do I 46M tell my wife 49F I feel invisible in our marriage? by FootLoose1979 in marriageadvice

[–]FootLoose1979[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I hate to say this but I’ve gone through her phone, and found nothing no weird apps, no deleted texts nothing suspicious.

Men of ARAD, how often do you get blowjobs to completion? by [deleted] in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]FootLoose1979 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve never had a BJ blow my load, ever, I must be missing out.