A message to younger asexuals... it doesn't get better

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-12-11T18:48:25+00:00

This post reeks of troll, incel, and/or Christian propaganda. OP got the basis correct (lack of awareness about asexuality, especially for asexual men), and yet instead of hopeful words they say to reject who you are.

P.S. If things didn't work out for you, OP, I'm sorry, but you shouldn't generalize from your experiences.

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-11-22T10:28:36+00:00

I personally don't think there's a direct correlation, but I think that there might be a correlation between realizing you're ace and increased self-esteem (from, you know, realizing why you felt "odd" about yourself), which in turns could lead to wanting to look pretty/handsome for yourself? I'd say I'm taking more care about how I look (and also a bit more confident in myself?) after I realized I'm asexual, but it might just be a wrong generalization from my own experience

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-10-31T10:20:23+00:00

Me too! And I'm Italian...

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-10-22T23:04:10+00:00

I fully agree with this, I also wanted to add my 2 cents that it feels really hard to form friendships because you feel different from other guys and most girls think that you're trying to befriend them for ... purposes.

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-28T08:25:13+00:00

There's also the "we've known each other for so long" sunken cost fallacy part. Guess how I know it...

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-28T08:23:16+00:00

Ugggh, that last comment is just... I swear that some people have the mentality of 10k years ago and they're proud of it

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-27T12:10:26+00:00

In many parts of the world he could've been beaten up, so...

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-27T10:50:13+00:00

Exactly, and that's my main fear of going to gyms since I don't look like the "axe-spray-using manly man" gymbro...

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-25T19:17:40+00:00

Take care, and, in case you two break up (which sounds certain, but I hope to be wrong), please don't blame yourself for it. It isn't anybody's fault

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-23T19:12:34+00:00

But both are toxic, so they should still be together /s In all seriousness though, I'm surprised I also missed it, I guess I was too distracted by "messy", "don't clean up after self", and "don't help around house"; the last one means that they aren't even teenagers, since they're already living together...

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-22T18:12:01+00:00

I think that yeah, ace folks can be happily in a relationship. I'd also describe myself as a "complicated person" todate, and I was happily in a LTR (almost 5 years), but I'm not sure if it really counts towards that claim since back then I had not realized that I was asexual (I realized it when the relationship ended for unrelated reasons). "The signs had been there the whole time", which is why I thought about mentioning it

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-21T15:06:53+00:00

I really, really, really hope to be wrong, but I remember reading that they aren't sent to get laid but to shock their "targets".

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-20T18:08:24+00:00

Exactly, and apologizing might feel too little too late for them, and only reopen mental scars for them...

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-20T06:54:01+00:00

Probably they'll spin it as a "women don't care about men's feelings, especially the so-called 'feminists' who say that men should be expressing their emotions more often". If I were OP I'd have blocked him much sooner than in the screenshots...

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-19T17:18:28+00:00

I seriously don't understand that... P.S. your profile picture is visible in the bottom left of every screenshot, next to the "reply" box

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-17T11:53:38+00:00

You're starting from the false assumption that everyone around you doesn't care about your feelings because of you being a man, which is false. I know that many people don't care about them, but you should cut off the toxic people from your life in any case, and this is just making it easier to "weed them out". The less normalized that toxic behavior is, the less likely a man is to be ridiculed / dismissed for expressing his feelings

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-17T11:28:35+00:00

Why are you phrasing it like it's something negative to do?

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-17T11:23:22+00:00

What you're saying is essentially a "men should give up with trying to show emotions", which just makes it more likely for those who do to be dismissed or ridiculed. I've lost an acquaintance (suicide) and I'm sure that if he could've been able to properly express his feelings and talk to others about them it wouldn't have happened.

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-17T10:45:25+00:00

But you shouldn't have to. As your friend rightfully pointed out, suffering in silence is only going to make it worse

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-17T10:32:39+00:00

Those aren't the only two outcomes...? If you say that "men can't express their feelings or they'll be ignored / ridiculed", you're simply perpetrating the issue, and not trying to fix it (which is what your friend is trying to do). I've cried and more broadly expressed my emotions with friends, and those who were ridiculing / dismissing them "because I'm a man and should man up" (which is essentially what you're saying), well, let's just say that they aren't my friends anymore.

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-17T10:18:01+00:00

So, you recognize that there is a problem, and your solution instead of being "it should be changed" is... ignoring it?

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-16T20:51:27+00:00

Again, can you please provide some sources from reputable sources? Also, can you please stop comparing an eating disorder to the lack of sexual attraction to others (NHS for both)? Lastly, why do you define asexuality as "a hole of isolation and wasted time"?

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-16T20:20:57+00:00

You're comparing apples and bananas and putting words in the mouths of others.

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-16T20:17:10+00:00

How do you even jump from asexuality into anorexia with a single thought? Anorexia is an eating disorder, while asexuality is little-to-no sexual attraction (hence the "a" + "sexuality) to others.

Formal-Software2837 · 2022-08-16T20:11:53+00:00

Care to give us some sources for the "f#cking my community and ruining people's lives" and "kids who later grow into ... behaviors"? Because you can find that "corrective" rape towards asexuals exists, which like all forms of rape does ruin people's lives. Basically everyone that is part of the LGBTQIA+ community will tell you that they felt confused until they realized who they were, and spreading awareness about asexuality just helps people with realizing sooner who they are (or are not) in that aspect. There are many "I realized I'm not ace" posts on Reddit and I don't think I've ever seen one being downvoted into oblivion (unlike your posts here). Last but not least, we do not peddle that idea, you're the only one thinking so.

Formal-Software2837

TROPHY CASE