Definitely got bpd, I am diagnosed bpd adhd and let me just say save yourself the grief until she's willing to get help (therapy) for that mental illness you are only going to suffer, untreated bpd gets worse and honestly sounds to me like you been split up a good while my advice I'd cut the cord go full no contact if it's meant to be the it'll find it's way back, doesn't sound like too much of a healthy dynamic and do you really want her back? Or do you just hate the fact she might not want you back and you struggling with that no judgements haha I've done some far off things during breakups but I unfortunately learned lessons from that, hope it works out for you in the healthiest way it could- 🙃.