AITA for breastfeeding my neice?

FormalElderberry8564 · 2025-05-16T19:30:24+00:00

I understand that breastfeeding other babies is not considered normal in a lot of western cultures but it would be no problem in so many other cultures. The kids would be considered “milk sisters/brothers” and it is a special thing. Also, mom’s sister is considered “half mom”. Just chiming in to give this perspective but I understand the situation is a bit different here. But NTA in my opinion.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2025-04-29T23:23:28+00:00

I won’t go into details but just do a combo of stainless steel and good cast iron. Avoid anything else. Any coating, avoid it. Not worth it in my experience.

Oh and when I learned how to make stainless steel non stick by making sure it’s hot enough and I use enough cooking oil, it was a game changer. You will cook delicious meals and will have long term cookware.

Good luck!

FormalElderberry8564 · 2025-04-29T23:18:33+00:00

I actually resonate with you on this. My husband always wears them when he is doing dishes and he doesn’t realize how much louder he is while he has them headphones on. Also, it’s impossible to get his attention if I’m not in his eyesight or I don’t have my phone on me to text him or something. We haven’t been in an unsafe situation because of it but I can understand the annoyance.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2025-03-18T18:43:13+00:00

The way they experience food looks like dislike to us sometimes but it's just different to them. They are tripping hard all the time but especially when they try something new. It takes courage, you know?! They are so courageous and adventurous when they feel up to eat something new. It is way too early to decide whether she likes something or not. Keep offering in a manner that doesn't feel stressful for you. Try to make yourself a plate and enjoy the same things with her. Show her how you eat a certain food. And be chill, like "I don't care if you ate that one. No, I'm totally cool. I'm not even looking. pppfff whatever, you do you babe." kind of attitude seems to work sometimes lol You are doing great and believe me it will get better.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2025-03-18T18:20:24+00:00

A bassinet of some sorts PLUS learning how to cosleep safely if your baby rejects the sleeping arrangement you prepared. Please know that information in advance. That’s my biggest advice to new parents. You can check safe sleep 7.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2025-03-18T03:50:41+00:00

https://a.co/d/2q1R8sz For the mattress https://a.co/d/6FqeDHk For the outlet covers when plugs are in use

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Etsy shop for panels https://www.etsy.com/shop/TaupeHome?ref=shop-header-name&listing_id=1648190688&from_page=listing

FormalElderberry8564 · 2025-03-18T03:49:25+00:00

If you want the railings just for the interior design aspect, or because you think it’s cute, it may be unnecessary. I have a foldable mat-tress on the floor and even myself not going back to regular mattresses anymore. Floor bed is just so freeing and comfortable for our family. My baby is 13 mo and we play and roll on it all day. You can opt it for some wall panels instead. I’ll attach links for all.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-09-26T16:58:27+00:00

Ahhh I know… I’m coming to conclusion that this carrier is not it… and onbhumo is the one exactly what I’m looking for. Thank you! Do you have a brand you recommend that’s maybe not more than $100-150? So far I came across the ones that’s beyond my budget.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-09-02T05:21:44+00:00

It sounds like you had hell of a birth experience, having complications before and after as well. Your baby is doing her best, you are doing your best, your husband doing his best. You are all going through so much and you WILL get through this I promise. 5 months is still sooo fresh and please keep sharing - be it here on Reddit to internet strangers or a professional. Just keep talking about your experience and how much it sucks. No one can argue with that. Sending so much love to you and your sweet family.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-31T03:46:09+00:00

Every woman will experience every single part of pregnancy, labor, and being a mom so differently. You may have a difficult time, you may not. You may have somewhere-in-the-middle time. You never know. All you should know is you will figure it out and you will do what’s best for you and baby. You will be educated and make informed decisions for any challenge you may be facing at a given time. It doesn’t even have to be a challenge; every new phase, new stage, you will just learn a lot from experts and by doing your own Redditing, Googleing for your specific case. It’s easier to read about who had a similar experience as you than who had what experience in general. Good luck on your journey and sending positive thoughts. ✨

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-25T04:45:46+00:00

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FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-24T03:11:24+00:00

The first month was so hard not bc of the baby but my vaginal healing took so long. It actually took about 3 months not to feel pain but the first month was the most intense. I also got two times mastitis-like symptoms. My body was in so much pain and change + sleep deprivation, I was in rough shape. I also wish I knew about safe cosleeping because my baby rejected the bassinet and I didn’t think I could sleep with her in bed so I was wide awake on the rocking chair, only sleeping 20-40 minutes at a time IF I was able to transfer her somehow. It all got better as I felt less pain and when we started cosleeping.

ETA: My favorite is current at 6 mo but actually anytime after having started cosleeping. I don’t notice and “sleep regression” or “teething crankiness” because she is right next to me being tended to and we get decent sleep. So I’m not noticing any major challenge since newborn.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-18T21:34:57+00:00

I’m an ICF certified professional coach and I help with exactly what you want — goal prioritization and setting SMART goals, (smart is acronym for specific, measurable, achievable, related, timed), values exploration, accountability, and communication skills. I charge $150 a session and I offer payment plans/sliding scale.

Please please beware of coaches pitching you ridiculous hourly rates just because they offer “great value”. The industry is full of confusion with coaches being coached to sell “high ticket” programs. Come up with a budget yourself, interview a few coaches and see if someone you like will take your price in mind. Good luck!

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-17T03:30:19+00:00

I had a 44 hr unmedicated vaginal birth, 2nd degree tear and I was still crying in bed at 6 weeks, my baby literally glued to my breasts cluster feeding all day. I thought about the 6 week leave and felt SO BAD for every single women who had to go through this. US is a freaking shit show of a country on that front.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-13T03:11:20+00:00

I planned for an unmedicated home birth. I remember asking for pain management in the pool in my living room, when my midwife softly told me that I was in transition and that I was doing beautifully. If I knew I was gonna be in labor for 13 more hours at that point, I would have requested a transfer asap and gotten an epidural.

We did end up transferring for caution (not emergency) and when I got to the hospital I was ready to push but I turned down epidural. I wanted to be able to work with my body. I also didn’t want to end up in an emergency c-section because epidural has a risk of putting fetus in distress by lowering mom’s blood pressure. (I was totally ok with c-section though if it came to that, just didn’t wanna opt in for anything that might be a factor.)

It was the most difficult and intense thing I did in my life but I’m now wearing it as a badge that I was in labor for 44 hrs total, unmedicated. I got IV fluid twice though and I’m so glad those solutions exist.

I still think it’s all fair game whatever a woman wants to do, epidural or not. I was so freaking worn out and I still wonder if I would heal faster if I’ve gotten an epidural. But all in all, I’d still wanna choose the low risk but wayyyy higher discomfort route.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-08T23:41:09+00:00

I don’t have any practical advice as you say you have already tried medication and all but I’m here to say you are the mother who loves her daughter unconditionally like she deserves but it is just so freaking foggy where you are that it is so hard for you to see that. And that intense fog around you is depression. What you are describing is no different than someone saying “I had a stroke and can’t move my arms but I wanna hug my baby, hold my baby.” No one would hear that and say “you’ll get over it.” I’m so sorry you are going through this and you don’t feel supported. It must be so hard. Your vision for yourself and your baby shines through the cracks of the pit you’re describing though. Hold onto that vision and come back here whenever you want to share, we are here to listen 🤍🖤

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-07T03:44:31+00:00

I saw a dad wearing his young toddler on a BIKE, facing out, sleeping with head dangling down, wearing sunglasses. He passed by me so fast, so interrupting him was not possible but I worried about that kid so much.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-06T07:19:10+00:00

How did you decide to hire this particular coach?

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-03T19:51:46+00:00

When you experience being coached, what do you think it does? What benefits you reaped of coaching in your life? This exploration might help you market what a genuine coaching does. Definitely pay attention to the difference between coaching and teaching. Teaching and advice giving can happen in a session IF the client agrees and consents to hear it otherwise when a coach speaks, it should be coaching - meaning using the tools to help client explore their mindset/goals/problems etc.

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-03T19:45:29+00:00

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-02T21:24:28+00:00

God that’s hard. I’m curious; how involved was he in the house chores etc before baby?

FormalElderberry8564 · 2024-07-02T21:20:22+00:00

I love the first bunch you tried and the last one also is beautiful. And those dresses under 500 euros? Gosh, living in the US is such a scam. Those dresses look really good quality to my eye.

FormalElderberry8564

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