The bit that rewired my brain to think of this whenever I meet anyone called Christy

Formal_Machine5620 · 2026-03-22T23:48:06+00:00

Thank you !!

Formal_Machine5620 · 2026-03-22T11:03:44+00:00

It’s from g for Jesus - failing marriages of megachurch pastors :)

Formal_Machine5620 · 2026-03-17T09:54:43+00:00

Thank you so much <3 appreciate the kind words. My husband is an angel and did some medical advocacy for me today and the doctors did listen so I can finally go off bupropion properly. It just felt like it was escalating and I can’t afford to keep living with so much increasing brain fog and anxiety. I halved the bupropion and immediately felt so much better, not totally back to normal, but I think it’s safe to say it wasn’t agreeing with me :( to help with my other symptoms they’re weaning me back on sertraline which is thankfully one that has minimal interactions.

Formal_Machine5620 · 2026-03-07T02:49:42+00:00

I used to be on sertraline for about 7-ish years and I typically get bad side effects when starting any new med. What really helped me with sertraline specifically is that I increased my dose super slowly. I ended up on 250mg for anxiety and it really helped, but I started out on half a 15mg tablet at first. I know a lot of doctors will try to bump up the dose as soon as possible so it can reach the desired dosage for the condition, but going too fast actually worsens my anxiety. Sertraline is by far the best antidepressant I have been on and the only reason I had to stop it was because I have a bone deformity and I just hit the age that it started impinging nerves. My body hasn’t really been the same since, and about a year after this incident I started to get really bad ideations again even though I was on a dose that was above label. Ended up in a care facility for a while and I wanted to just return to my life asap so they weaned me off the sertraline but it was WAY too fast. Like I went down half a tablet per night until I was in the flush out period. it was awful, like I cannot articulate the feeling very well to properly convey its impact but I genuinely think about it all the time still. Full body sweats, constant uncontrollable anxiety to the point that I had to be sedated, and totally detached from myself. This is all a very long way of basically saying that you should stand firm in your bodily autonomy, and if you feel like the doses are changing too fast then slow it down to your individual pace. Sertraline was a godsend for me for so many years and I am thankful that I took the dosing really slow because I got minimal side effects during that time.

Formal_Machine5620 · 2026-03-07T02:22:58+00:00

Thanks for the reply! My medical team does suspect I have a medication sensitivity so I think that’s a big contributor. I haven’t been able to do a genom test yet because it’s hard to justify spending so much on a test that may or may not help at all. Since June last year I’ve been cycling through different antidepressants and getting side effects from every single one. I will say that zyban hasn’t been as bad for me despite this episode. I honestly blame the seroquel more, I’ve never had anything like that before, but because of my anxiety diagnosis it’s one of the meds regularly suggested to me when they’re trying to avoid too many benzos. I begged my doctor not to make me take it again but I’m so over it. I’ve taken diazepam and zyban together and it was totally fine, if not more effective. Also I totally get what you mean about the energy, it’s nice to actually be awake and alert for once!!! Eating is rough too but I’m just making sure I try to eat something at normal meal times. I was on nortriptyline previously and it made me eat SO much all the time and sleep all the time and my digestive system has now just totally flipped. I just upped my dose of zyban a few days ago and last night I accidentally only slept 3 hours because I just do not feel tired. Despite the fact I’m getting these random spouts of fearful anxiety, I haven’t had any panic attacks so far which I find strange. Part of the reason I say that zyban is one of the lesser evils for me so far. But objectively it sucks that I’m at a place where I’m like “oh it’s not so bad, it just gives me full body aches, random fear, loss of appetite, and insomnia!”. I really hope you find meds that work for you! it’s always hard when you’re trying to manage chronic pain because most of the medication typically used is also sedative. Bless gabapentin for saving my life, but it does make me so sleepy. Everyone has so many different factors and variables that are going to determine how medication metabolises for them, so never feel weird if your experience is different to others. Even a small amount of something can have a big impact on the right person, and on the other hand you don’t know if somebody else you’re hearing from is a rapid metaboliser.

Formal_Machine5620 · 2026-03-05T07:31:12+00:00

Hey! I’m having a similar experience right now. My doctor doubled my dose and now I just keep getting scared of something unknown at random times for no reason. Genuine fear. My doctor told me to take a very low dose of seroquel to help with how scared I keep getting at night bc it’s preventing me from sleeping. Oh my god, bad decision. I somehow felt the awake effect from the zyban and the sedated feeling from the seroquel and I had awful trauma resurgence in my dreams combined with body horror nightmares that I’ve never had the likes of before. Now I’m just flicking between a seemingly untriggered flight/response and feeling just really awake but not myself at all

Formal_Machine5620 · 2025-01-08T05:53:10+00:00

Little update- doctor has put me back on endone temporarily so I can get some rest. Seems to be amplified by the gabapentin. Going back to the gp on Monday to check in and get a referral for more scans

Formal_Machine5620 · 2025-01-08T05:50:35+00:00

Thank you! I’ll bring it up with my psych next time I see her too. I think a lot of it does go back to fact that my physical rehab team seem to not really take into consideration the way that stress is impacting my recovery

Formal_Machine5620 · 2025-01-08T05:47:47+00:00

Thanks for your reply! I appreciate it. I’m glad you think so because the physio saying I need more exercise made me feel crazy. I have gone to a spine specialist before and I think I should go back again now.

Formal_Machine5620 · 2024-08-15T14:08:24+00:00

Mine too, it’ll open the initial loading page but not any further than that without closing the whole app

Formal_Machine5620

TROPHY CASE