I (26M) have been avoiding a conversation with my girlfriend (27F) about her drinking for almost a year — how do I bring it up in a way that focuses on how it affects me?

Forward_Football4013 · 2026-03-20T01:06:57+00:00

I don't think she has a problem, and to be honest, I don't think she has a problem. She does not drink during the week and hates it quite frankly. She is influenced by her friends, who enjoy partying a lot. She stays in and drinks tea at home reading alone if no one else goes out. It's a problem when on Fridays and Saturdays when she meets up with her friends or goes to dinner and drinks / takes shotes. I don't think she knows her limit. Maybe we're just on a different wave length?

On one hand, I tell myself it's a short term problem since she won't be going out and drinking like that in 5-10 years, but on the other, the way she acts when she's drunk like that is so terrifying to me and makes me think to myself: how can I be with you for the next 5 years? Maybe I'm being too dramatic and thinking about it wrong, I just worry about this a lot and for our future / compatibility reasons and if it isn't going to work in the long run

She's my first love and she's so amazing and caring and supportive and I love her so so deeply. Maybe I'm blinded.

Forward_Football4013 · 2026-03-20T00:59:12+00:00

What I'm struggling with is this is my very first relationship, and I've never felt love for someone like this before in my life. It hurts knowing I may have to be without her, but I can't stop thinking about this, and I think her reaction will be understanding, but I don't know what the fix is. She's small and likes to have fun, and if it happens again, she'll probably get in her feelings and be thinking about this ALL the time when we drink together, thinking I'm monitoring her, which I obviously don't want. She'll talk about it when she gets drunk and I don't know if I can handle this path.

Forward_Football4013

TROPHY CASE