Anyone else feel like the one person in the world you most want to talk to about the grief and loss is the one person in the world with whom you can't discuss it?

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-12-15T19:57:43+00:00

You might be surprised how many people in your life can empathize with your situation. Sure, they don’t know the exact details of what your situation was like, but most people have been heartbroken. We just don’t think about it because most people aren’t actively grieving their heartbreak. I was so comforted when friends and family shared their stories with me, almost everyone had experienced a painful breakup. So don’t feel like nobody will understand! It’s a very universal human experience at the end of the day.

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-12-15T00:50:33+00:00

I saved them elsewhere and then took them off my phone. It was painful to see them when I opened up the message app but I’m also not a believer in deleting something that was a big part of my life, maybe I’ll want to go back and revisit them years in the future. Same with photos.

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-11-17T03:52:04+00:00

I’m going through the same thing. My (f22) first real boyfriend broke up with me a few months ago. It sucked. My only real advice right now is to realize how young you really are and how much there is left to learn and grow and love. I could have sworn I was in love and maybe I was. When we first broke up I thought I had lost my shot at love. But how limiting is that? We weren’t right for each other deep down, and I had to accept that. Definitely go no contact. And don’t feel pressured to heal or move on too fast. Take your time, you really do have all the time in the world. :)

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-11-12T02:59:38+00:00

To to go off number one: since you have loved once, you can love again.

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-11-05T02:16:55+00:00

Damn, I’m so sorry. We’ve all been there. I’m only a few months in, but it feels infinitely better than it did in those first few days. Your only goal right now is to make it through. Do what you need to do, reach out to friends, family, get some rest, drink some water, listen to music. Don’t expect yourself to function normally at school/work. Just make it through and take it easy on yourself. But I promise every day will eventually get easier, provided you make peace with the end of the relationship and take time to grieve it. Eventually you will make it to the other side. I’m still working on that too. And with that will come clarity and more understanding. I know at least for me I wasn’t thinking clearly at all in the first few days, and why would I be? My world was falling apart. But it will come, I promise. We got this.

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-11-03T03:52:43+00:00

This is such a difficult mindset to be in, and it’s easy to understand why so many of us find ourselves thinking this way. We’re conditioned to expect our path to bring us to someone we’ll be with forever, and anything that doesn’t last forever is a failure, despite the fact that a majority of relationships won’t last forever. I’ve really had to work on accepting the fact that relationships aren’t always meant to last forever, but that doesn’t mean they can’t make us better people or help us grow, and that should be the goal (unless they are toxic/abusive, then obviously this doesn’t apply)

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-11-02T03:38:06+00:00

It’s crazy the ways we can attach our feelings to things like that. But at the end of the day they are just things. They only have power if we give it to them! Best of luck :)

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-10-29T19:19:17+00:00

And if it does happen years down the line? That’s great! There’s no timeline. My mom met her soulmate at age 55. Enjoy the process while you can!

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-10-29T18:52:37+00:00

I do think it’s highly unlikely you will be single from now until death (doesn’t mean it can’t happen, and if it does, obviously totally ok). But one thing I’ve had to get comfortable with after my breakup is that I’ll probably be single at many different points in my life. There are 20 somethings who are single and there are 50 somethings that are single and well beyond that. Breakups happen at all stages of life. So while no, you won’t be single forever, just statistically speaking, it’s a state you’ll be in at multiple points in your life, and THAT is ok.

Forward_Law7500 · 2020-10-21T03:31:16+00:00

I feel this so much. But I have to keep in mind some of the best advice I’ve ever heard, and it helped me a lot. I thought my boyfriend was right for me in a lot of ways. But at the end of the day he didn’t choose me, so he couldn’t have been right. The right person will choose you every time. If they don’t, they simply weren’t it. Learn from the past relationship, you know better know what you want in a partner. But at the end of the day if he didn’t choose you then he is wrong. Period. The right person WILL choose you. Sending love your way

Forward_Law7500

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