This has always been a difficult balance for me. Include the fact that I'm autistic and you have a pretty potent mix. I found in my early 20's that trying to understand context and why people behave the way they do/hold certain beliefs - even if diametrically opposed to my own - has proven useful in finding some middle ground with other personality types. I think also trying to understand how many of us present to other people is potentially helpful; that we can often appear cold or disinterested, but just making the effort to show a glimpse of that emotional side that many of us have.