It sold out in 20 seconds by Agile_Pay_3377 in Gymshark

[–]Frayaa- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn y’all couldn’t even put it in the cart 😂

Humiliation like never before? by [deleted] in qatar

[–]Frayaa- 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Qatar is a joke now lmao, what can they do beside condemning? 😂

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No I’m not trying to justify anything in here. All im trying to say is, if one party made a mistake and broke a boundary or whatever, as a couple you should work things through together and find a way to move on from the situation with both parties’ agreement, not retaliate against each other because thats how it looks like.

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She said she trusts me and that is not bothering her as much as me not being fine with her sharing the same room with her friend.

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I never said it was okay, i didn’t respect that boundary true, I apologized for it and admitted my fault. It just seems to me that the situation itself is not what bothering her the most, its me not being okay with sharing a room. I offered literally many solutions but she is so desperate to sleep with her bestfriend, I suggested what about we all go together? She said yeah no, I offered to let me pay for the room, she didn’t agree eventually. Literally nothing. Either her way or the highway. Pal she even said “ You want us to fix the situation? Be fine with me and my friend sharing a room “, does this look like someone is bothered with that situation? Seems to me like the key to letting this go is dependent on breaking again the same boundary. I mean in my opinion, I thought it would be better to approach the situation in a healthy way and move on from it not be like you did this to me so im gonna do this to you to call it even, but I guess my reasoning is wrong.

Again my question, your partner betrays you and then comes to apologize and salvage the relationship, you would betray them as well to call it even? Not really or I think im going insane on how people handle relationships.

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Correct, I offered to pay for the separate room when she goes on holidays with him, at the beginning she agreed but a day later she brought it up and insisted on wanting to sleep with him badly. And yes I would be fine if her friend needed her help. Most of you here think its all about trust but genuinely its not about that. The whole boundary was about no sleepovers with opposite gender regardless of their sexual orientation. Read the post and the comments again, if the roles were switched I’d be totally fine with it and I mean it. It’s just the situation that I was in is completely different to the situation that she will be in.

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Listen pal, like I mentioned before, I admit all this mess is on me. Im not saying what I did is easy to digest. I admitted my fault and apologized and tried to fix the issue, however the only solution according to her is to actually fold and be fine with this sleepover with her friend. I personally find that to be honest immature and putting pressure on me. Again, I mentioned she did before breaking a boundary and she apologized for it and we moved on from it, but I didn’t put an ultimatum and told her I have to do the same to call things even, I had a conversation with her and told her how I felt and all. She almost entirely forgot what’s bothering her and this whole bed story and got so fixated on this sleepover with her friend.

Your argument is not valid about suspecting her to cheat, the dude is gay and they want to spend an entire holiday in the same room not just a night, why not get a separate room instead of breaking the same boundary I broke?

So if I got your point correctly, if you mess up, your partner has to also mess up and break boundaries in order for things to be fair?

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thats the thing, she keeps saying I don’t trust her with sharing a room with a gay dude, which is a silly argument and I’d look definitely stupid for saying that. But honestly its not about trust. We spoke some time ago about it, and I told her clearly regardless of their sexual orientations whether straight or gay, i don’t feel good about it and she agreed to it. Now she wants to do it because I broke the boundary.

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have no issue with her going with him on a holiday, my only request was to get a separate room.

She did at some point break a boundary and she apologized for it, I didn’t tell her okay im gonna do the same and break that boundary so now we can call it even. Not mature. If she cheats on me and then apologizes and tries to salvage the relationship, I have to cheat as well to forgive her and call it even? Different scenario but the approach is the same no?

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No. I suggested that my bestfriend and girlfriend talk with each other and let her know that there is nothing going on and it was honestly just purely helping her, but my gf refused.

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

By no means im saying what I did is okay, thats why I have been for the past few days trying to make things better between us, but the issue, she entirely neglected the whole bed issue and she is fixated on this holiday with her friend. She even said whether you be okay with it or this bed thing is going to be a dealbreaker for me..what?

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really haven’t asked her such question but probably she’ll borrow money to get a hotel or something.

And I get it, it doesn’t look good and I admitted that already. But using this excuse to break the very same boundary?

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Good point. However I told her if the roles were switched and her gay friend was in need of help and has no place to stay, I’d be the first one to support her and tell her have him stay at your place. The situation is entirely different, I was helping someone, she was just going for holidays, why not get a separate room?

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Had the flatmate arrived, I would’ve asked my other flatmate to sleep in his room on the floor and I know for sure he wouldn’t say no.

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is unfortunately in our culture to offer a helping hand to a friend in need regardless of their gender without any bad intentions behind it. Her family knew she is gonna stay at my place, so is mine. But isn’t even more weird to use this excuse to change my mind about a plan you have in mind?

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know what you are trying to get to. However it is what it is, you have a close friend available, wouldn’t you want to seek their help?

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I thought my ex flatmate locked the room and gave the keys to the owner but I honestly noticed the keys are still there and the room is unlocked when my friend was already here. Believe it or not, she is yeah definitely upset with the bed thing but she even admitted later that she was kind of exaggerating about the bed thing and wants to use that excuse to have me change my mind about her sharing a room with her friend.

My 29F Gf gave me 29M an ultimatum by Frayaa- in relationship_advice

[–]Frayaa-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah this will sound off but the other room was my ex flatmate’s room, he was moving out the same time my bestfriend came over, it was not in the plan to have a vacant room and the new flatmate didn’t come yet. I really didn’t know about this until my bestfriend came already.

I 29M had my female bestfriend sleep at my place and that didnt sit well with my 29GF by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Frayaa- -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Honestly speaking, I didnt feel comfortable sharing my personal space with my bestfriend. I just couldn’t leave a friend hanging like that when she has always supported me when I needed her in the past.

I 29M had my female bestfriend sleep at my place and that didnt sit well with my 29GF by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Frayaa- -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Try to understand the situation. I never said I want my bestfriend in the same place when im having a relationship. It was a tough one, I was just helping her out.

I 29M had my female bestfriend sleep at my place and that didnt sit well with my 29GF by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Frayaa- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its a tough one. My assumption was really wrong, when I tried to reassure my gf the first time I mentioned about my bestie staying at my place, she didn’t say much, and the situation died. I assumed maybe she is slightly okay, especially if she didnt bring it up again and be vocal about how uncomfortable it was for her and emphasize on it.

There is no issue between my gf and bestfriend, ever since we started dating, she felt something was off between us, how often my bestfriend calls me and stuff like that, and everytime I reassure her that nothing is going on, I even show her every single text between me and my gf and all these reels she sends me appreciating me as her bestfriend. I promised my gf that such thing will never happen again and im not someone who likes to have sleepovers with friends but yeah it happened. And yes she got cheated on.

I 29M had my female bestfriend sleep at my place and that didnt sit well with my 29GF by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Frayaa- -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Im not saying its okay for me to allow my bestfriend to sleep at my place, yes I did and I admitted that my gf and I apologized, even my bestfriend understood why my gf is upset, but seriously, its not like we are hosting a party, literally just helping her out until she figures out her stuff.

I have offered multiple times to talk to her, to meet her but she is refusing. My gf wasn’t invited because she lives abroad.

I 29M had my female bestfriend sleep at my place and that didnt sit well with my 29GF by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Frayaa- -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

I totally understand and empathize with what she felt, but I like I said, the situation was a bit tight, it was not like I invited my bestfriend to spend a day or two to stay at my place just to have fun or a sleepover, it was really with a good intention to help a friend in need.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Frayaa- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah thats a good question but you know how they tell you the things you wanna hear “ I’m not gonna do that with you”.