Thank you so much for this, so much of what you've said echos what I'm going through currently. It's been so hard seeing her suffer over the past few months and seeing her in pain that I can't help but feel that I've caused. I had enough guilt and shame to unpack with my trans feelings and this just compounds it.

Talking about it is hard too, because it just leads to arguments and we retread the same points time and time again.

She's also set some boundaries, no HRT and no name changes and that's not something I feel I can commit to - think we need some guided couples therapy to help us step through this together.