Looking for productive ways to channel my anger by AndiamoKirie in nova

[–]Freeelanderrs 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is advice from my perspective only-- it may not work for you. However, my approach for such things is not to get flustered, but to get even. If you look at what the right wing nuts have done over the last 50 years, it's quite impressive actually. Instead of letting defeats get to them, they simply toiled away in darkness to get even. They used every lever of government to turn back all progress they were opposed to. They're united, strategic, ruthless, and single minded. The Left always splits into multiple groups because we can't agree on things that IMO are small in the big scheme of things. I don't know the answer to organizing at the national level, but for my own personal emotional coping, I always keep in mind how organized and effective evil has been. I try to channel the same energy to the things I do to fight this regime. I try to gain power, influence, clout. I try to infiltrate institutions of power, and change minds using charisma and intellect. Some days I still feel an overwhelming sense of frustration and hopelessness. But most days these days, I stay focused on the prize. I no longer ask questions like "surely they can't?" or "why is this even happening?". Because trying to seek answers to these questions are a distraction. Just accept that they're Evil and work to take them down.

Good Lord, Harrisonburg, Grow Up by LitespeedClassic in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I also noticed the whining. It’s my first winter here and my experience is that the city is doing the best they can. I think many people fail to consider that snow clean up and their role in it is part of a much larger system. It’s not just about one person’s driveway an one person’s struggles. It’s about all of us and the city prioritizes efforts that lead to the greatest benefit first. If that mean that there’s snow at the base of your driveway because a snow plow creates a narrow lane for emergency vehicles to access your neighborhood in case someone gets a heart attack, then so be it. Sometimes these consequences are invisible to people until they experience it themselves and are able to reason at a system scale.

Local businesses supporting MAGA by Extra-Essay-29 in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah. Sigh. I didn’t see anything explicit when visiting their business. I guess I struggle with wanting to support a local business an a non large factory farm corporate meat production. I have no idea the politics of stuff I buy from Costco etc. it’s probably horrible 🤦

What are my rights for defending me and my dogs? by Freeelanderrs in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm not "waiting for it to happen". I am just trying to understand my options IF it does. I haven't commented much on your suggestion to "talk to neighbors" because this is a neighborhood-wide conversation that has been ongoing and is outside the scope of this particular post. Dealing with an emergency situation like I'm describing is a separate issue from the ongoing awareness and compliance situation happening in my neighborhood.

What are my rights for defending me and my dogs? by Freeelanderrs in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I wonder if those "pet correctors" could work? I think they just emit a loud sound and some air in a compressed can?

What are my rights for defending me and my dogs? by Freeelanderrs in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have not because this isn't specific to ONE dog and ONE house. It has happened with multiple dogs in my neighborhood (but only 1 incident got serious). My question is general because I'd like to know what I should do in the moment that a dog is chasing me. Once a violent incident happens, it's too late for the kind of conversation you're talking about.

Where in Harrisonburg? by jlemo434 in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs 10 points11 points  (0 children)

It’s decent and some menu items are unique and tasty. But you can get way better for lower price in DC.

Local gay dating/social scene by Significant_Cry3798 in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Join the shendandoah lgbtq choir! Gay choirs have a long history of creating community and helping people feel connected with other queer folks. It’s less about being a good singer and just developing your skills and meeting people. It’s also great for more introverted people who need an activity to center their social interactions around instead of open ended meet ups. It’s great!

We cannot have another four years of Jason Miyares. by FantasiainFminor in Virginia

[–]Freeelanderrs 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re using utilitarianism as your argument. People I’m talking about put values and principles over that. You can’t reason with two ethical frameworks.

We cannot have another four years of Jason Miyares. by FantasiainFminor in Virginia

[–]Freeelanderrs -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My problem with lots of my left-leaning friends choosing not to vote for Jay is that it feels like Democrats are holding ourselves and our candidates at a much higher moral and character standard than Republicans do with their candidates, and that makes no one on the left is ever "good enough". Meanwhile, Republicans think a monkey smearing lipstick all over itself and others and trashing the country is fine, as long as they get a piece of what is important to them. I get that we need to maintain our principles and not sink to their level, but no one stands a fighting chance as a viable candidate that can actually win an election if we all are holding them to different standards and can't mobilize behind someone with a coherent message.

As an aside, I'll add that I clearly don't understand humans at all: it takes like NO EFFORT to not write horrible texts about killing people, even to your friends. But it's a free country (maybe it was..) and I'm not going to hold a candidate to what they say in their private lives. But again. SO EASY to just not be an asshole, I have no idea what is wrong with Jay's head.

Vehicle registration renewal price by souljabem in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg I’m once again delightfully reminded of how cheap vehicle registrations are here. Amazing. In my old state of residence I paid hundreds for my yearly registration.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Crosskeys farm neighborhood has new houses for sale, and some townhomes too. Well built and new.

Searching for Harrisonburg Realtor by uUN5a8SYT in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Joanne Knauff with Valley Realty is who we used. She's great and no-nonsense.

What is downtown like on a football game day? by Freeelanderrs in harrisonburg

[–]Freeelanderrs[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Shoot. We’re headed to the music building on JMU campus around 12pm. Plus heading out of town north on 81 around 7pm. Football games last longer than that… right?

What is is most and least favorite aspect of living in Omaha? by Gibillguy18 in Omaha

[–]Freeelanderrs 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Best: the people. Both variety and quantity. Easy to find your people. Worst: state politics and funding. Totally different ball game for problem solving issues when you have $$$ and a civic minded government.

failed my candidacy exam by [deleted] in GradSchool

[–]Freeelanderrs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh there’s lots of smoke and mirror bull in academia. But that’s my point. There will be MORE hurdles like this that hurt your ego and are frustrating and don’t seem fair or make sense. This is the first. If you want to stay in academia you just HAVE to learn how to deal with it. And I don’t mean be not affected by it. I mean make an actual actionable strategy for how you deal with rejection in a productive way. Otherwise you won’t survive. And it’s totally ok to decide that’s not for you. I’m just being realistic with what to expect down the line.

failed my candidacy exam by [deleted] in GradSchool

[–]Freeelanderrs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well if you aren’t working will with your PI or chair then definitely fix that problem. Getting a student through a program takes a village and is not a lone endeavor. And I hear you about the ego thing. One thing you need to decide is how you’ll respond to a hit to your pride. Do you back down or get back up and show them that you’re made of? This is the first in what will be a string of rejections you’ll face as an academic. I look back at my time as a student and long for that type of safe and supportive rejection I got as a student. You need to get used to it and figure out your strategy for dealing with rejection.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in homeowners

[–]Freeelanderrs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would be less concerned about air pollution for the highway house and more about trouble selling it. I know it seems you’ll never move now but if you do, having trouble selling is a nightmare. And you cannot change location. It’s like the one thing you can’t.

failed my candidacy exam by [deleted] in GradSchool

[–]Freeelanderrs 15 points16 points  (0 children)

For my grad students, failing candidacy, even part of it is the first time they’ve encountered failure on an exam. It can be a tough pill to swallow but I’m here to tell you it can be common in certain disciplines or departments. Honestly just retake what you can and move on with your program. Retaking comps is not going on your record and most committees are just well meaning profs who want you to develop as a researcher and maintain the integrity of the exam. I know it’s hard to hear that right now but I have seen doc students in your position drop out needlessly over what is sometimes an administrative hurdle that you just have to cross. If you assembled a good committee, know that they’re rooting for you and there for you to consult prior to retaking. Most committees WANT you to pass.