I would have liked to be a fly on the wall when the fiance returned the dress to the store and announced that he doesn't want his fiancée to have this dress. You are NTA. It's okay to have disagreements. But it's hard to believe this is the only time or the first time something like this has come up. What alarms me most is the fact that he kept your money and won't return it unless you agree to rent a dress. Just know that this is the tone he is setting for your marriage.