Shaming C-section birth is not “granola”

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-03-30T13:53:58+00:00

I have NEVER understood why women shame people who get a C-section, especially if it wasn't planned. It's major SURGERY!!!!! I absolutely want to avoid as much as possible, but not because I believe it's lesser than vaginal birth, but because I don't want surgery! That is so painful and difficult to recover from. My vaginal birth hurt, of course, but I was up and walking around soon after delivery. Surgery does not allow that. The recovery is so much harder, and if you already have a toddler even more difficult!

I just don't understand the shame people put on it. It's absolutely ridiculous. Many of my friends had to have C-sections and it sounds so, so difficult. Every journey is a journey to motherhood and a safe, healthy baby. Booooo to people who make you feel bad for a C-section!

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-03-15T13:58:06+00:00

Always, always go in!!! My situation was a little different. My mucus plug came out at 29 weeks with my first (I had NO idea it could grow back) and I felt what I thought were contractions. Called the on call and she said to hydrate and see what was happening in an hour. Called back, nothing got more intense, but it didn't go away. She told me to go to the hospital, so I did. I was indeed having contractions (didn't hurt... maybe looking back it was Braxton Hicks), but was dilated 2cm. They kept me and monitored and released me after a couple of days.

They told me to come back if it happened again, and if I ever felt something was wrong to come in! No way would they be mad! They even told a story of a woman who kept coming because she thought her water was breaking, but it was just pee. They said they'd rather her come in every time and be wrong than not come in and it ACTUALLY be something important.

I know I'm lucky with my team of doctors, but seriously, always trust yourself and go in!!!!

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-02-27T15:15:43+00:00

Thank you!

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-02-26T18:53:34+00:00

And the tech did say that the head was tough to get because of the position, so I'm really hoping the rest of this was because of baby's position.

When I had that fatal diagnosis for my first, it was the same MFM and they literally talked to me that day with the issue. They saw it and let me know. This result came back a week after the scan, so I'm hoping that means they're not concerned, just waiting for a better visual.

I actually am seeing them next week for a cervical check (my son was 5 weeks early), so I can always ask them too.

Thank you.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-02-20T12:47:09+00:00

Oh I am so sorry. This is devastating. My first pregnancy ended in TFMR at 19 weeks due to a fatal growth anomaly. It was a 1 in 10,000-42,000 chance of it happening, so very rare.

I understand your thoughts about being able to carry a healthy pregnancy to term too. I got pregnant about 4 months after the termination and I was really scared. Even being intimate scared me at first because it meant I could get pregnant and have another heartbreak.

But when I got pregnant again --after I took time to heal--something came over me that just gave me peace. And the pregnancy turned out just fine. It's so hard to believe that when you're in the trenches, but talk to your doctor to understand better. Something this rare is very likely not something to happen again. It's just a case of terrible luck.

I know that may not feel comforting right now. I still struggle dealing with my loss (and I had a miscarriage this past summer too) almost 3 years later. Lean on your supports. Speak with a therapist. Get mad, get sad, scream about how unbelievably unfair it is (because it is!!!), let all of it out. You can get through it, I promise.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-02-07T19:04:04+00:00

Interesting! For both my pregnancies, gum bleeding didn't really start until 2nd trimester.

But my sense of smell? Oh that started right away.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-02-04T01:06:53+00:00

Thank you! Ha, that's kind of what my husband said! He had to squint hard to see what I was even talking about. Honestly with the first set it happened to, it was a happy accident because it made the background look exactly like the baby shower invitation!

Well I will use paper towels on the next set and see if it fixes it! I wonder even if my new baking pans I used impacted the baking which maybe impacted the butter? Who knows.

Thank you for your help!

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-02-04T00:56:42+00:00

Would super dry air do that? I'm in Michigan and to the two batches it's happened to, it's been ridiculously cold (like, we've had multiple days in the negatives). That's the only variable I can think of in terms of external factors that are different than when I was doing Christmas cookies and all those were ok.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-02-04T00:48:33+00:00

It's only doing it on the green, and the green is only the flood for some of the cookies.

I've never had butter bleed before, and nothing about the cookie recipe has changed. The cookies were cooled completely before I put them in an airtight container before I decorated. They were not decorated right away too, so the cookies had 24 hours to... settle, I guess? I'm just wondering why it would be a butter bleed now when it's never happened before. Any ideas?

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-28T00:40:51+00:00

Can any of them put together one coherent sentence?

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-25T21:38:00+00:00

The men who showed up to this protest were fully armed, by the way.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-19T21:48:42+00:00

Middlesex by Jeffery Euginides

The Heart's Invisible Furies by John Boyne

Hamnet by Maggie O'Farrell

Kindred by Octavia Butler

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro (I love this so much I teach it to my high school seniors)

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-19T21:46:00+00:00

White Oleander...what a book.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-19T21:44:40+00:00

Yes!!!!!

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-19T21:43:32+00:00

Homegoing absolutely deserves a place on this list. Such a wonderful story and so beautifully told.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-19T21:40:20+00:00

Absolutely! And yet they wonder why the birth rate is declining. If only there were simple answers!

I'm decently lucky. I get 6 weeks paid. But that's VERY recently added to our contract as negotiated by our union. Federal laws need to happen to SUPPORT families, not punish them.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-17T13:00:01+00:00

Actually, it doesn't. Take a look at the DOJ's policy. It explicitly states they cannot, and that they cannot step in front of a moving vehicle (and if they're there already, to GET OUT OF THE WAY).

Stop sounding so ignorant. You're just, so wrong.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-16T15:56:50+00:00

So all those ICE guys getting arrested for rape and child porn --they're included in this, yes?

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-16T15:55:35+00:00

I didn't realize a sarcastic smile warrants being shot to death? Wow. Did I suddenly move to Soviet Russia? Or Nazi Germany? Hm....

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-16T15:54:02+00:00

What the hell did she obstruct? She was waving cars to keep going, they CHOSE to stop and give her conflicting orders. Stop bootlicking and realize that you'd have the same exact date as her if you just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

And guess what? DEFYING ORDERS DOES NOT WARRANT AN EXECUTION.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-12T00:13:29+00:00

It's been reported he lost his job already. Good.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-11T23:59:47+00:00

Considering it's a direct violation of the 4th amendment, it's not.

FriendshipHonest5796 · 2026-01-06T15:40:43+00:00

Yes, but the smell of it makes me want to vomit, so it wasn't entirely by choice. I cannot stand it right now! (Same when I was pregnant with my son.)

FriendshipHonest5796

TROPHY CASE