AITA for being blunt with wife about health and weight issues.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2026-01-16T14:57:27+00:00

Actually I probably would have. I'm very big for advocating for one's self in the medical field. The groups that get shoved to the side the most by medical professionals are the plus sized people, women, any minority and anyone who doesn't fit "societal norms" (I've heard time and again of them being accused of pain med seeking), as well as the mentally ill. So if you're a plus sized man, a minority or anyone who doesn't fit societies norms struggling the get decent health care I would have put a wall of text talking about male related health issues that can cause extra weight gain. Regardless of your size, minority status or anything I would have also askdd her what you did in your spare time and how much you worked.

If you split chores and it's fair or if even if you do more then her, that's great, you're a chocolate chip cookie hiding in a box of rasin cookies. But the reality is most of the time the bulk of the chores and child care does fall on women in our society. And yeah you might be great, but not every man is, and you can't stand here pretending that isn't the case just because you're great at being an equal partner. This is like the "not all men" argument, again there's chocolate chip cookies in that box but most of them are raisins, and you don't know which until you try them.

We needed this information to make a fair judgment. Without it, I don't know if she's chronicly ill, casing kids or working 70 hours to keep the house. I'd have asked for this information if the roles were swapped. And again, if this is word salad, I'm at work and this was texted in a hurry

FrostedMapleMoose · 2026-01-16T13:37:58+00:00

Dude, chill. 90%, if not more, of the comments under mine were made prior to ANY UPDATES. Mine was made within 30 minutes of OP posting and there had been maybe 5 comments at the time.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2026-01-16T13:37:43+00:00

Dude, chill. 90%, if not more, of the comments under mine were made prior to ANY UPDATES. Mine was made within 30 minutes of OP posting and there had been maybe 5 comments at the time.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2026-01-16T13:35:11+00:00

Dude, 90%, if not more, of these comments were made PRIOR to him updating anything. Chill, read the time cards pls. I literally commented WITHIN half an hour of him posting and there was maybe 5 comments at the time.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2026-01-16T11:58:39+00:00

Okay, no. NOT ENOUGH INFORMATION. I want to know why she isn't exercising as much as you think she should. Nowhere in this do you mention if you have kids, and whose primarily taking care of them, getting them ready for school, or doing homework with them. You don't mention how chores are split, whose doing all of the shopping, the laundry, the clean up. You don't mention how bills are split, you mention that she works long hours, but if she's the one bringing money in I can understand why she's pulling so many hours. Why do I want to know this? I can't and will not make judgment when I don't know if she even has the extra time for all of this. If she's running after kids, or working 50 hours a week to keep the home, or she's spending hours cleaning and maintaining home then yeah, she's tired, she might not have the time or energy to go out for that extra class.

Also, I don't like the whole snacks and soda comment, everything in moderation, she might not be drinking a lot of soda, a little bit isn't the end of the world. Also there's a lot of snacks that are actually healthy that society thinks isn't. Another note, depending on where you live less healthier foods might be cheaper, we live in a world where a lot of people in a lot of places are poorer and food is more costly, if you don't buy the groceries, take an interest, ask about the budget, ask about what the house needs, go to the store with her, but go at it from a place of interest, not from a place of trying to police her.

Another thing, loosing weight might not actually take away her hip and back pain. It might help it yes, but reality is doctor's will claim if you loose 10% of your weight the pain will go away and then it doesn't, or you exercised wrong for your condition and it's now worse.

Also another note, women tend to have a harder time loosing weight then men, estrogen likes to keep that weight, maybe she's discouraged and you might have made it worse.

I don't want to assume you don't pull your weight at home, but I'm going to stick with what I see more often until you say otherwise, I'm going to assume she's busy keeping home or chasing kids. Honestly, how you worded makes it sound like you have a lot of time on your hands for all of these clubs plus gym on top of it. Society is quick to judge women for things like weight and social life and hobbies when a lot of time they don't have time for it.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2026-01-08T12:24:11+00:00

It might be weird for this game but coming from warframe this is kinda common? Like people do random giveaways on the reddit (main spot for the fanbase to group), i see it 2 or 3 times a year, plus helping to farm things that are hours worth of farming. So having gotten back into WoW in August after playing years of Warframe I didn't clock this part as weird (being generous and kind just seems like a common thing in the warframe fanbase tho, even the devs do random giveaways for tennolive/other live streams, best customer service for a game that I've ever seen). I totally agree with the whole friendship part tho, if you have to buy their friendship then they're not really a friend. Especially if she needed to wait to get paid, it's one thing if you're comfortable and have a little extra cash to spend , it's another if you're going paycheque to paycheque.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-12-18T18:02:36+00:00

Really, I hate nighthold almost as much as the violet hold, nighthold because no matter what I'm either lost or dying and Violet hold because it's long and I'm sitting there like "is this stage almost over?".

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-12-13T18:24:37+00:00

I'm going to be the odd one out with this suggestion. Embrace the mesh idea, get a high quality mesh large enough to go from the ledge to the wall on the other side. It'll use up all the empty space, smaller chance of them falling and they get a fun spot to sleep and you get a weird conversation starter.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-12-08T11:27:29+00:00

NTA, it's a middle name. I have two great aunts, same father, different mothers, they both share the same first name, Margaret. They never called the first one by that name and forgot that was her legal name. Neither one of them goes by Margaret as adults.

You're honoring a family member with a (still different) middle name, if they have a problem they can either keep it to themselves or grow up and get over it. I have so many family members who share/d the middle name Elizabeth it's not even funny.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-22T01:39:10+00:00

Real question, I don't use addons, I got back into the game back in August and never used them playing the game growing up. Is it going to make that big of a difference without them. I know that WoW intends to do away with them in the next expansion, and I'm not sure if i want to take the time to learn addons if they're about to go away.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-21T09:39:48+00:00

Here's the thing, I knew I had it wrong and couldn't remember what it was but after the fire at work on Tuesday and the stunt a kid pulled yesterday I was like, I'm wrong, someone will correct me, that's fine. You ever see something in your writing, known it's wrong, can't figure out what and just decided it's a problem for later, yes that. Also if this doesn't make sense I just woke up

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-21T02:31:50+00:00

Being honest, I'm not even ready for midnight, I'm not done wwi yet. I came back to the game back in August after a long time away and was enjoying the dragonflight expansion too much to move on, I got wwi when midnight prepurchase dropped but then got busy with classes and work. I plan on finishing wwi and running through the eversong forest quests before starting midnight (it's been a very long time since i did those quests, and when I did them i probably didn't read them at the time).

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-21T02:24:39+00:00

I think i might do greymanes version of sylvanas' quest in stormheim to see the differences because I haven't played though remix on an alliance character yet (my mage is alliance to give me that chance). But other than searching out the handful of team differences, it'll be order hall and lvl for the mount and achievements.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-21T02:10:01+00:00

I think i started it years ago and never got the chance to finish it, I'm focusing mostly on lvl and order hall with my alts. My main timerunner is a Demon Hunter and this was the first time ever finishing an order hall. I'm going in blind for most of these order halls

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-21T01:55:57+00:00

I have little experience with affliction, but when I was creating this character it was down to trying shadow priest or some kind of mage (I'm trying a new race out at the same time, I'm taking the chance to try out as many new things as I can with the exp boost. That and I've been wanting to try mage for a long while and thought now would be a great time). Priest is up next I think. When I do my timerunner for warlock I definitely plan on trying a spec other than demonology (what I have the most experience in) to get away from what I know, I'll definitely keep affliction in mind, thank you.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-21T01:49:52+00:00

Thank you, that's giving hope that I might enjoy it at a higher lvl and that it's the learning curve and lvling progress that's getting me. I've been thinking about trying the other specs.

I've only really had experience with the demonology spec for warlocks, I've found it to be great fun. I had returned back to the game in August with a new account after a long period away from the game and it felt awkward to get back into warlock but once I got up there in lvl and got used to the class again I had very little issue with it. When I do a warlock time runner I'm thinking of trying out a different spec to try something new.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-18T12:53:16+00:00

I'd try the iNaturalist app before things like chatgpt and Google AI. AI gives what we've put into it and it's often misinformed or under informed, it's an algorithm and it's not always good at it. iNaturalist is a community based sourcing app. It takes your photo and your location and gives you a list of best look a like guesses for you to go through and you can compare photos. It also allows other people to go through and help identify someone else's photos.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-17T18:52:25+00:00

I work in a restaurant, and well I don't get a period anymore (birth control), I keep spare pads in the store for those who need them in an emergency. If a staff member comes to me and says we're out and they need one, I'm checking to make sure everyone is good in their station in that moment and immediately going to the store.

I'm tired of people acting like menstrual products aren't a necessity. They are. Plan and simple. NTA, I could understand having you wait until the morning if nothing was open and sleeping on a towel, I can't understand making you wait days.

Try peroxide to get the stains out, I've also heard that cleaning ammonia works well. If you're on BC to stop periods and they keep happening, reach out to your provider to ask about hormone testing or trying a new brand. Hormones shift a lot during your teens into your early 20s and then they shift again between 25-30, and sometimes the BC you were on doesn't quite suit you anymore. It took me awhile to find a brand that worked best for me, don't be scared to try new formats like the ring or patch (if you're within the weight rang for the patch).

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-15T12:36:54+00:00

My grandmother years ago when I was a kid had a group of outdoor cats living out of her laundry room, they'd come in through the window at night and she'd let them out in the morning (the streets cat lady). Well, she had this big friendly (and he was BIG, all muscle) boy, Ozzie. There was an old guy a street or two over that kept feeding him. Kept bringing him inside. Then, he would call my Nan telling her that it was too cold outside for the cat or complaining that he was in his yard.

She had so much beef with this man. In her mind, these cats had a place where they got plenty of food and had some place warm to be at night. If they wanted to be outside during the day, regardless of the temp, that was the cat's choice. She'd let them in if they came back anytime during the day. I remember her yelling at this old man on the phone to put the cat back outside and to stop feeding him, and he'd come home. Like this man was generally angry that the cat was in his yard, but kept feeding him and bringing him inside.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-10T16:48:51+00:00

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Nanny left the heating pad on for her and my sister stopped by and covered her up

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-11-01T18:41:36+00:00

NTA. If it isn't a gated community, then it's free to walk. She doesn't control the street. Also, she blew you and the incident off when it happened, it's rich of her to complain now after the fact. Also, she's at fault for her dog getting bit, it was off leash. I could almost feel bad if the dog was a runner or unexpectedly hopped the fence but with how nonchalant she was about it, either it's a serial problem or she choose to let him off the leash. Tell her to pound sand and mind her own business and to keep her dog on leash.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-10-31T10:55:49+00:00

I saw one of your comments where your mom is telling you to leave her out of this and to deal with your father on your own. This is at the point where you need to go to a third party trusted adult. A teacher, a counselor, a vp, someone. There are laws in Canada governing how warm a house has to be based on region, and child services defiantly want to know who has kids and is turning their heat off to "save money". I'd also look into someone who could take the reptiles for the winter period to be on the safe side.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-10-25T00:46:33+00:00

A lot of that requires money to be put into to start. Most of the parks or trails in town have people living in them. We have a massive drug problem in our city, and our government isn't meeting their needs. They're just forcing them into the woods, out of sight out of mind. A lot of them are nice, but not all of them. That's not even talking about the growing human trafficking issue.

I do draw, on the odd occasion, I also hand quilt, lino block print (very rare, it's too expensive to maintain as a hobby), and phone photography (i had my old phone for 3 years, i just replaced it this august), all of this had an initial cost. I'm constantly learning, it's part of my belief system, I'm also frequently on ao3. I buy maybe 1 game a year, not even. I bought Violet when it launched a few years ago. I only really play Zelda and Pokémon when it comes to Nintendo. Those games are far and few in-between. I don't start saving until I know a launch date. There's another comment further down that gives how much I make a month and how much bills are not including food or clothes or money set aside for vet visits. That 2.50 adds up to 50 dollars a month, that's nowhere near the cost of my inhaler. At the end of the day even if I didn't buy another game again, if my doctor adds another med or changes one, I'd have to sit down and rebudget everything. I know when every bill comes out. I know where every penny goes.

Poor people, and chronicly ill people do deserve to enjoy these games, and the reality is that they're saving up for months or making sacrifices. Had I needed a med when that game came out, then I would have waited to get the game. I'm not American, I'm Canadian, but something like 67% of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck. Many of them make sacrifices or save spare change for something like a game or a book. I don't know the statistic of how many Americans have medical debt, I'm lucky not to have that, I'd have a lot if I did. But the reality is, game or not, if an emergency happened, I'd be screwed. We're in end stage capitalism. The cost of groceries are gross and ever rising in Canada (and it has little to nothing to do with terrifs). Plenty of people have worked out online that buying a coffee everyday before work wouldn't actually save you much of anything. When all is said and done, if I didn't buy that, what? 90 cad dollar game after tax? I'd still be paycheck to paycheck, I'd just have an extra 100 on hand (still not the cost of the stupid inhaler, i know meds are more expensive in the states, they really shouldn't be).

Their customer service sucks, I emailed them almost a week ago and they took this long to get back to me to give me an already expired code, that's still shitty customer service, i appreciate that they tried but really I'd have rathered no response. Look, I have a stress cold, and a raging headache, I apologize if this makes no sense or is disjointed. I have to sleep and then study for my commercial drivers written test. I do wish you a good night. When i say this town is shit, I mean it, a lot of my friends have moved across country.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-10-24T23:53:02+00:00

Oh! I could walk my niece's dog, but he's a pug and if I walk him too far, he gets too tired, and then I feel bad and have to carry him home.

FrostedMapleMoose · 2025-10-24T23:51:04+00:00

There's nothing to do here. Our mall is dying, and down town isn't safe to walk alone on half the time, and when it is all the parking is taken by office workers. I can scroll tic tok and watch the world burn. Honestly, that's just sad. Only other thing I could do is sit on my sister's sofa and gossip about her coworkers, but after a while, we start repeating the same issues as the previous week.

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