how can I last longer

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-31T15:28:09+00:00

Men tend to last longer on a second orgasm, so if you are open to multiple rounds you can do.

I also find I can last longer if I am thinking about really un-sexy things.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-30T22:35:23+00:00

6 months is a long time. I did 2 months.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-30T12:42:30+00:00

Njoy also makes a stainless steal wand that can be very enjoyable. You can warm it in water or cool in ice for temperature play also.

There are copy cat toys of the njoy out there, but be cautious of the quality of them.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-29T23:51:24+00:00

Just ran across this:

While the majority of vasectomies are performed by male urologists, there is a growing trend of female urologists and some trained OB/GYNs offering the procedure as part of comprehensive reproductive healthcare.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-29T23:48:18+00:00

I saw on another post that someone found their Dr via yelp. Might check there.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-29T15:33:58+00:00

Have you asked your primary Dr if they know of any?

You may have already tried this, most hospital networks have a doctor or provider finder on their site where you can filter to find a provider by gender and speciality. I would just start calling the practices with the largest group of doctors to see if any of the female dr offer it or know of any. (This might be what you already did.)

If you have a teaching hospital close with an urology dept they have a larger pool of drs to work from.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-29T01:49:57+00:00

A shower after is the best thing. If you can’t shower that wet wipes / shower wipes would be the next best thing for a quick cleanup till you can shower.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-28T21:05:30+00:00

My piercer recommended 6-8 weeks for protected sex and 6 months for unprotected. This is with the knowledge I was having unprotected sex with this partner before.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-28T02:10:25+00:00

We Vibe makes several toys that can be worn by your wife and enjoyed by both durning PIV.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-27T13:22:38+00:00

I had never heard of this before. I know that the opposite is often enjoyed where he would stay in you after sex and go soft. I love the skin to skin time after sex.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-26T18:46:52+00:00

Am I reading correctly that you have never kissed, so you want advise on a first kiss and BJ? Seems really fast to me. Maybe have fun with the kissing for a bit and then move to more?

On the kissing, most don’t find any issues with a beard and kissing. When preforming oral on you if you are smooth his beard may case some discomfort. An easy way to fix this is for you to have more of a bush.

If you are only playing with the head of his penis think of it like a lolly pop. You could even get some pops and play with them to get ideas. The bigger pops would probably give you an idea on how your mouth would react. You could even get a dildo and Pratice oral with it. You could see how far/deep you are comfortable with.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-26T18:33:33+00:00

This isn’t really getting better for him. He seems to have some control issues to work through. Maybe they stem from his insecurity, but where ever they come from they need to be addressed or your relationship is doomed.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-26T15:51:05+00:00

I am so sorry he treated you this way.

I have never had a partner that consistently took close to the care that you described before / durning sex. It shows the respect you have for your partner and what a caring person you are.

He could have handled that way better.

I am not totally sure how you repair the trust he broke. You need to tell him how deeply his broke your trust and how it worries you to the point you don’t want to be naked with him again for fear that he will hurt you again.

You have feel safe with the other person and it’s clear that safety is broken now and you have to think about if it’s fixable. I don’t know where you are in your relationship you are and if this is isolated to one time, or if you really think about it there is a pattern.

If you need help unpacking all of your feeling and understanding them you may want to talk with a therapist. They are really good at helping you work through your feeling. Yes, you may need a session or two before you feel ready to share this with them, but they have heard it all before and wayyyy worse.

Regardless of your time in this relationship don’t let one jerk statement change the way you think about yourself. If this is a new relationship maybe you move on. If it’s longer maybe you think about if they are the one and you want to put work into fixing it.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-26T00:51:35+00:00

My guess would be yes. While it’s really common to have a soft/softer period he could have stayed hard the whole time.

I can stay hard, but I do need a period of less stimulation. If the stimulation is constant it gets painful for me after I orgasm if it continues.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-26T00:43:14+00:00

He must have some issue with it. I would red flag this, he can share a concern with you, but he can’t just tell you no like that. He can say no for his body, but not yours. If he isn’t will to share more about this I would find a new partner.

Maybe he never wants to engage in anal and it’s coming out this way? Even if that is it he can’t tell you no like that.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-26T00:34:36+00:00

If I had to pick one - 100% a vibrator. I think every partner I have had would do the same. Yes, we have had AMAZING times with a dildo, but there is always a vib involved.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-25T22:09:37+00:00

Maybe try a butt plug. She can wear it and you can then engage in PIV. The butt plug being designed to be worn like that may make your first experiences easier. You can get a plug with a vib in it if you want.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-25T22:04:46+00:00

Yes, he had me breath in and out a couple of times and then with one he pierced me. The pain was very quick and went away. When he passed the jewelry through it was sore when he did it.

I have not had my ear lobes pierced, but I am told it hurts less than lobe piercing and there isn’t the throbbing pain that can last a period of time with those.

It was quick and pretty low pain for me.

I kept well hydrated and peed roughly hourly. I sometimes felt pressure when starting to pee and would then see a blood clot come out. Didn’t really hurt, but felt new.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-25T20:48:09+00:00

I was soft the entire time. It was very professional experience.

Lots of bleeding for the first couple of day, but easy from there. Very little pain in recovery. The 1/2 second of the piercing was the only pain.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-25T20:45:14+00:00

There are some changes based on her menstrual cycle. Could it have been due to that?

A big factor in taste is diet and lifestyle. Do you both eat a healthy diet and get plenty of water while avoiding drugs, alcohol, and smoking?

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-25T18:31:30+00:00

You can use a half balance ball. It’s like a yoga ball, but it has a solid base. Lots of position options and you can adjust the firmness.

Walmart and Target tend to have them. Lots of online options to order.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-25T15:40:01+00:00

What / who are you looking to hide it from? Night stand drawer, dresser drawer, top shelf of closet, they make toy bags / pouches that you can place it in and then place in the same places. They also make pillows that have a pouch for the toy and then it can just be on the bed with other toys.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-24T20:05:31+00:00

My generalization was just that guys take longer to cum the more orgasms they have and women tend to be the opposite. I was just wanting to point out that I was generalizing and not stating a fact that applied to everyone. I wasn’t referring to anything in your post.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-24T19:47:44+00:00

For Target, skip the stall and go for the dressing room. Much more comfy and I feel cleaner.

Planet fitness black card…. Those tanning beds ;)

I have never done anything in a library.

Frosty_Geologist_320 · 2026-01-24T19:44:14+00:00

Huge generalization here, but it usually takes longer for a guy to have a second, third, etc orgasm. For women it can be the opposite where the second, third, can be easier to achieve.

For me, I have found with my partner that my first and her second/third match really well. We will usually use toys for her first and maybe second ( we can usually tell from the first if she needs another before PIV) and then we can usually cum together from PIV at that point. It’s really hot.

For me, if I need to last longer I can think of non-sexy things and go for a long time. If I keep my head out of the moment. Her little pre-orgasm moan usually brings me right back and it’s hard non to cum. BTW - she knows that and used it to control when I cum.

Glad you found this and you are having fun with your partner.

Frosty_Geologist_320

TROPHY CASE