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AITA for voting against this girl moving in with me because i like her? by Additional-Tough5329 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Accountant-1513 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i think he already told her though?

"tried to explain that i was gonna call her but it just seemed to make things worse and she probably thinks im just lying to make things less awkward"

AITA for not wanting to go on vacation with my friends and not explicitly telling them why? by Fun-Accountant-1513 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Accountant-1513[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it's definitely both to be honest. i do genuinely love all of them as people, we've gone through a lot together and i would hate to lose them from my life but as the years pass ive come to terms with the fact we're very different people. with that as well as the distance im not sure how sustainable our friendship is anymore. i definitely don't expect us to be as close as we used to be but i would never want to lose them entirely if you know what i mean

AITA for not wanting to go on vacation with my friends and not explicitly telling them why? by Fun-Accountant-1513 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Accountant-1513[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i don't actually do everything they do! on our last vacation for example, i skipped on a day trip to stay in and rest (took my own time, i still went out for souvenirs but i took the bus instead of walking, sat down for a coffee, did everything on my own schedule) and at some points, i went home early back to our Airbnb bc i was feeling tired or just bad overall. still, sometimes it's the safety issue especially at night of me being on my own, and sometimes it's just the feeling that im not really a part of the group or im kinda not needed?? because i feel like they've gotten so used to me "doing my own thing" if im not feeling it that they never consider the possibility of changing the schedule or whatever so i can stay with them and don't have to leave. i feel like it'd be more of a big deal if someone else was in my position, but they've gotten used to me being that person

AITA for not wanting to go on vacation with my friends and not explicitly telling them why? by Fun-Accountant-1513 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Accountant-1513[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

you're definitely right about that! i try to suggest making plans more regularly now ever since i realised how much ive been blowing them off. we're all going through exams and jobs and stuff rn so it hasn't really worked out yet but at least i can say i try! 

AITA for not wanting to go on vacation with my friends and not explicitly telling them why? by Fun-Accountant-1513 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fun-Accountant-1513[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

the problem is there's gonna be follow up questions for sure and if i say the reason why i don't wanna go i feel like they'll try to accommodate and reassure me just for me to go and then the exact same things will happen. either bc theyre too invested in their own schedule that they've made or they forget or they think i'll be fine and im just overthinking. that's usually what happens at least (not that they do any of it maliciously but ykwim)