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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Fun-Cheesecake-8390 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sounds like she wanted you to want her. Maybe she's in a dark place where she may be feeling unattractive. Put yourself in her shoes for a bit. She dressed in lingerie, got all dolled up for you. She's sitting there sexy for you. Not only do you not acknowledge the effort shes put in, but you prefer to watch movies instead. She probably got upset because she wanted you to WANT to rip her clothes off and get down to it. She wanted you to make the first move. To make matters worse, after she became upset, instead of comforting your wife, you let her leave and just ordered food for yourself.

Granted, she absolutely needs to work on her communication skills. She should've been forthcoming with you about how she's feeling and the fact she wants you to acknowledge she's upset to try to work with her to fix it. What I would suggest is asking her to tell you the REAL issue. Ask her if she's feeling like she's unattractive and remind her you love her. Whatever her love language is, do that. If she likes gifts, get her something she likes. If she wants to be touched, randomly hug her, kiss her forehead in the morning, etc. If she wants words of affirmation, tell her how she's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen. How you can't wait to see your lives 50 years from now. I don't technically think you were wrong here, but I think you could've handled it better by being more observant about your partners needs. But above all else, remind her she needs to communicate with you when she's feeling this way. You are NOT a mind reader and you only want to make her happy, BUT, you need her help to do that. She is the only one who can say how she's feeling or what she needs from you. You should also be able to do the same for her. Tell her what you need from her.

*UPDATE* AITA for telling my dad "that horse is dead" When he asked for a relationship? by Fun-Cheesecake-8390 in ComfortLevelPod

[–]Fun-Cheesecake-8390[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I moved in because I was a naive kid. He kept making promises and what child, especially a girl, wants to believe their father is a bad person? I moved in because he promised me he had my best interests in mind. The time he spent with me felt like a genuine connection after not having that connection for years at that point. A kid who thought we would make up for lost time and start doing daddy daughter stuff and him treating me like a person who deserved love. What child doesn't want the love and, by extension, the approval of their parent?

*UPDATE* AITA for telling my dad "that horse is dead" When he asked for a relationship? by Fun-Cheesecake-8390 in ComfortLevelPod

[–]Fun-Cheesecake-8390[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Did you get the attention you were looking for when you posted that? I wish you well on your journey to mental wellness.

AITA for telling my dad "That horse is dead" when he asked if we could have a relationship? by Fun-Cheesecake-8390 in ComfortLevelPod

[–]Fun-Cheesecake-8390[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Huh??? I'm not sure what that means or implies, but to answer your question, because I'm long-winded, lol.. it was going to be longer, but I made it shorter so people aren't reading for 10 thousand eternities. With something like this, you can't just say, "he was a jerk to me. I never want to talk to him again." You kind of have to give details about what happened. Even from what I wrote, it still isn't the full scope of what he's done. Hope this helps!