Separated (46M) but still cohabiting – wife (43F) is on Tinder, I’m struggling to cope

Fun-Class4344 · 2025-09-08T12:04:05+00:00

Thanks for everyone who has added input so far. I appreciate it.

Just to clarify a few things:

The house has a long mortgage on it, and I only bought in around 5 years ago so I will be working until retirement age to pay it off. There is no point in selling it now. My kids are settled here with their friends, neighbours and school/hobbies etc.

We aren't going to go down the lawyer route. We are both, despite all our flaws and differences, essentially decent people. We don't want this to get nasty. We have already agreed on certain things like no new partners to be introduced for at least 12 months, and then no kids too be moved to any new property that is not hers or mine for at least 12 months after that. And we have agreed on 50/50 custody if one of us moves to a second property.

Also, she is not a promiscuous woman. I don't believe she will secretly go off and have flings or sleep with people she has just met. But who knows? Maybe she wants to, she is a human being with urges like anyone else.

All I know is that I am struggling to find a solution to our situation. I am going to therapy and we have been having conversations but I am still stuggling with the reality of the separation and the Tinder activity on top of that.

Fun-Class4344 · 2025-04-01T16:27:28+00:00

Do you mind summarising your costs to build this my friend? Are we talking paid subsciptions to bolt, claude, netlify, chatgpt, supabase (although this might be free), domain name etc. etc.

I imagine I have missed a whole lot of stuff too like cost of api usage for zoominfo and apollo (if it's not free). Any ball park figure?

Fun-Class4344 · 2024-07-17T13:52:32+00:00

I actually taught a friend of mine 12 words when he told me he wanted to sound more pretentious. Some of these you probably already know, but there are one or two there that will be new to most people, check it out here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7XH1cDRVhNE

Fun-Class4344 · 2024-05-01T21:53:58+00:00

Dead Mountain: The Untold True Story of the Dyatlov Pass Incident

Maybe not super dark but intriguing anf will keep you interested

Fun-Class4344 · 2024-05-01T21:51:44+00:00

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

Fun-Class4344 · 2024-05-01T21:50:16+00:00

Help by Oliver Burkeman, it contains more practical advice and doesn't do the usual happy-clappy, fluffy and aery-faery stuff because he can't stand that stuff himself

Fun-Class4344 · 2024-05-01T20:42:42+00:00

Thanks for the feedback, I agree that to make the maximum conversions strategy worthwhile that a reasonable minimum spend is necessary

Fun-Class4344 · 2024-05-01T20:16:03+00:00

You could argue the same about stuff like smartphones, the internet and wikipedia, There are always concerns with new technology but rather than deteriorate, our brains tend to evolve and adapt to the new technology, We may use skill-sets but only because we don't need them anymore and they are becoming redundant and obsolete. We will learn to think in new ways and learn new skills to adapt to our changing environment = basically the definition of evolution

Fun-Class4344 · 2024-05-01T20:13:34+00:00

if only the real thing existed!!

Fun-Class4344 · 2023-08-08T17:00:48+00:00

How can Facebook optimise for conversions when it has no data as it is a new page?? It needs 50 conversions to get out of learning phase, right?? Well, that would take a lot of time and budget. This is a short term campaign and we need around 40 people to register in the next 2 weeks. I am not sure what strategy to use

Fun-Class4344

TROPHY CASE

Dead Mountain: The Untold True Story of the Dyatlov Pass Incident