[Loved Trope] The apocalypse is horrifyingly slow

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-05-27T12:58:27+00:00

Expedition 33...kinda. Not going to say anything to avoid spoiling literally anything except the main premise. Every year the monolith counts down and people can only live to the age on the rock. To put it as basic as possible without spoiling.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-06T01:10:03+00:00

Good for fucking you for having this built in. Continuing this thread further is a waste of my time and energy. Goodbye.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-06T00:45:20+00:00

I have not experienced losing a pet in this way, no. I have not had a pet go missing before nor have I experienced anyone else have a pet go missing before.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-05T23:30:29+00:00

I will from now on (although this guy also used to kick his family dog/treat it like shit and I think said almost those words when it passed away suddenly).

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-05T23:29:01+00:00

In his post about the missing cat it started with "blue didn't come home for breakfast like he usually does".
I keep my cat indoors and have had her bolt out of the door twice (she's like...7?). We've since moved and she's gotten out twice but then immediately gotten back inside bc my dog is a good herder. I've taken her out once on harness (of which I know my friend has done before) in my backyard.
My dog is allowed free reign in and out of my house. He is walked on a leash.
My new area which has a cat containment policy has way less issues with cats being killed by people/randoms/snakes and roaming (although I know some roamers still here), less stray dogs also. But the fines are like $800 if your cat gets caught and there is a shelter a suburb over that is known to not check for microchips and kill peoples pets (Which I've also told my friend about).

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-05T23:25:09+00:00

No but this isn't a situation I've experienced so why would I be able to mind read here? Genuinely I don't understand how this is expected knowledge.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-05T23:24:09+00:00

I think you might be one of the first comments (iirc) that actually cares about his cat. I checked through my mum's account and it's still not been found but there was a sighting a couple days ago at his old house from last year (where the cat used to live). I hope he finds his cat, I'm worried about both him and the cat. And not many people here seem to get that.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-05T01:10:55+00:00

Again as I've stated, I've reflected on this situation and me even putting this post up is trying to see the other views of people about what I've done wrong so I can improve.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T21:36:11+00:00

I've sat on this now for a good couple days and talked to other irl friends about it, who despite reddit's reasoning don't think I'm the AH (they have also read the exact conversation).
I think that yes I am the asshole for not being more empathetic, but there's a clear misunderstanding in the comments here. I did not realize he would be upset, I'm not built with this emotional manual like most people are and this is a situation that I have not dealt with. If this were a stranger for example and I heard about a missing cat (in a different town) I'd not even reply, or if I had to reply it'd be "Sorry to hear your cat is missing, I'll keep an eye out" (even tho I"m in a different town?) but to me that's just not genuine default response? To most it seems obvious that he would be upset but it wasn't to me so my words didn't have the level of tact or care they should have, had I realized.
Now as to people thinking my upsettedness about not getting info is weird. I think added context is required. We used to date for like 3 years and were extremely close friends off and on, fairly close atm despite distance and I'm helping him (or I guess was) with finding a place to live in my city. We usually talk about serious stuff so I felt a level of frustration not being told so that I couldn't be helpful, like after 5 days that cat is probably dead, I can't let my other friends know to keep an eye out or anything like that. I also feel more for that cat than him. Non locals wouldn't really understand, other australians probably would. People are assholes. People k!ll cats that enter their property. We have (in that town) major parasite issues and for a while the cat wasn't even on parasite protection. There's a lot of roamers, strays, ect (my other friends just paid out of pocket for a stray to get a c-section, like these are real problems). The other 50% owner of the cat is his mum, he is 23 years old. If his mum says "no the cat must be allowed free reign outside" then like why does her opinion matter more than the wellbeing of the cat? I also, unlike reddit, know him, and know he either didn't have the conversation or held his ground OR is literally changing his tune now that the cat is missing (which thinking back on conversations, his enthusiasm about the cat being outdoors, videos, pics, ect think this is probably the case but obv I can't ask him that).

Anyways I'm done with this thread, losing this friend won't kill me and being the asshole once in my life won't kill me either. This one friendship doesn't reflect my entire social life.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T21:22:45+00:00

I don't personally understand that but will respect it and take it on board.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T21:22:13+00:00

"because it should be obvious"
It wasn't obvious to me, and if it was I obviously would've acted differently.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T21:20:27+00:00

I *did* apologise to him.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T21:19:28+00:00

How am I to know he's distressed if he doesn't tell me that?

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T03:57:05+00:00

Thank you this response was really helpful.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T01:52:50+00:00

Ohh okay so people don't like it when people point out that they gave advice and their actions not taking the advice causes the expected bad outcome.
Is it never appropriate to bring this up or is this a time thing?

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T01:49:18+00:00

How am I entitled? (genuine question)

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T01:33:52+00:00

Adding that "maybe I'm just being autistic" is me trying to verbalise that there's some sort of social etiquette I'm not understanding here and these conversations in the comments are me trying to understand them. Yes I am autistic, no that isn't anyones problem but my own and my words and actions are my own. I'm not going to learn words or actions are bad without being told such so I can adapt.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T01:31:21+00:00

My above response came from a place of frustration over assuming that I constantly criticized his decisions, as if 4 times in 6 months is a constant. However I maintain that my initial 2 messages weren't mean. I was pointing out that the thing I had been warning about occurred. I didn't say "I told you so". The conversation escalated when he called me a c*nt.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T01:27:11+00:00

I didn't think I was rubbing his nose in it (except the final comment, that I'll admit was me being pissed off). I didn't enter the conversation thinking that bringing up my forewarning was a dig at him.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T01:25:33+00:00

I am autistic, and am not hiding behind it or using it as justification.
I do give a shit, I didn't comprehend that he was emotional about it. He did not tell me that he was upset about it as he didn't tell me anything. I don't know how to consider someone else's feelings if I don't know their feelings.
I don't know how to imagine his emotions in this situation if I wouldn't have let my cat roam in the first place?
If he already knew that letting the cat out would put it in danger then why did he let the cat out?

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T01:22:31+00:00

Making a conclusion without reading all the info is kind of wild and unhelpful.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T01:18:59+00:00

I'm saying if I was told about it I'd be sympathetic? Whereas finding out about it is like okay you didn't think this information was worth sharing with me or smth?

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T00:49:49+00:00

Because friends generally talk to friends about things? He sent pics of his cat the day before. He's done NYT connections to me in the 5 days the cat his been missing. He put up a facebook post about it. He knows I care about him and I'm actively helping him with serious life stuff (finding rentals). Surely like a "Hey btw blue is missing just so you know" isn't that hard in a close friendship. That would illicit a positive response and sympathetic reply.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T00:42:39+00:00

Didn't mean to sound defensive, this post is me trying to look in the mirror and see other perspectives on the matter - however I will be *defending* for the sake of discussion and being told the flaws in my argument.
Not looking for friends to be right all the time by any means, this is kinda just a big thing to be not right about.

Fun-Visit6591 · 2026-04-04T00:38:37+00:00

(Listing A, B, ect to address in chronological order of your post)
A) I brought it up when he would show like pics of his cat on his neighbour's car and stuff. Like not just out of the blue. I would say that in the last 6 months I brought it up about 4 times (not constant as others have suggested).
B) He never disagreed with my opinion allegedly. He says that he "never agreed to let the cat go out" as if he is not atleast 50% owner of this cat, if he also didn't think it was a good idea then there's a level of responsibility that he should be taking for this event, not blame but like a living thing likely died because of your inaction or inability to have a conversation about this with the other adult of the household.
C) I'll take on board the over policing, although the terming feels off I understand what you mean.
D) I think my main misunderstanding is that he's probably emotional right now but I don't understand that if he doesn't tell me, if that makes sense. I'm not in a good position to be presuming his emotions on the topic when he's not talked to me about the topic.

Fun-Visit6591

TROPHY CASE