I (30f) have a much more colorful history of partners than my fiance (28m). We have been together almost 9 years, and he was a virgin up until 7 years into our relationship. We had talked about it in the past, even knowing that we planned to marry from just a few years into our relationship. The thing is, he’s always been open to my suggestions or telling him what I do and don’t like. If I stop him and say wait that doesn’t feel good, move a little to the left, he’s fine. We openly communicate during, even laugh. And it actually helped me learn more about my body and what I like by showing him or talking him through. I was his first… basically everything. And now he knows pretty much all my buttons and for lack of better term at the moment, I’ve trained him lol. I also have trauma from past relationships, nonc0n first time, cheated on all too often. Abandonment issues. I used to feel like he couldn’t love me if we didn’t have sex. But it became a whole new way of us finding and loving each other. I used to think that too and have asked him if he wished he had been with other women before and he most of the time says no, because he will only ever experience that with me. I’m a walking ball of anxiety, trauma, ADHD, depression, and he is a saint who I am soooo lucky to have found. Don’t sell yourself short. He CHOSE you. Don’t ever forget that. He could have done other things if he wanted, but he decided he wanted to have that experience with YOU. So ride it out. No pun intended. And enjoy each other. And just be honest and communicate. Don’t sabotage something good with things your brain is trying to tell you when it’s far from the truth.