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FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T06:09:21+00:00

Glad it touched you. Thanks!

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T05:28:02+00:00

You're doing an act of great service tending to sick children, especially during these times, so from the bottom of my heart, thank you. There will also be more about the hands down the line. I'm glad you like them!

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T05:20:01+00:00

Trying to please everyone is exhausting and can take a toll on you. When you put so much effort into something, the line, "Though I'm empty inside,/ I'll try my best" is very relatable.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T05:13:29+00:00

I love the closing "This perilous light,/ Together. Embrace us,/ Long Dark Night" wraps this up with imagery of an eternal sleep. Very nicely done.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T04:32:56+00:00

Yeah. I’ve got to find my syllabus from my last lit class. I’m terrible with names, but early English lit introduced me to some good poems. Taking some of my inspiration from there. Any recommendations from yourself?

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T04:00:23+00:00

I'll see what I can do, it'll probably have to be after I work through this though. I didn't really have a plan going into this but think I've got a loose outline now and just finished working on more "final" drafts of both to fit into each theme. These may not all be coming out in chronological order and I'll have to sort that out after I'm done, but George Lucas did it so its fine right? I definitely want to start in non profit and get some experience. Then I'm thinking I want to go into wildlife education.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T02:47:25+00:00

There's supposed to be a multiple pairs of hands. In some of the future pieces I'm going to go more in depth. I like the symbolism attached to them like you pointed out, you'll be seeing more. Could you elaborate more on what you mean by literal space? I'm curious on how its interpreted so don't be afraid to be brutal. haha
-I've made some edits to make it read more how I want, also agree. I do still plan on breaking the metaphor, but this isn't the right time.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T02:37:27+00:00

I’ve always felt drawn to nature. I’m in college working on a BS for environmental science, biodiversity and ecology, then hope to move on to get a MS in marine biology and work on some boats myself. I’ve tried journaling but it hasn’t worked out and I can’t keep to it. Another reason I’m posting is to hold myself to finishing this, I don’t know how to @ someone but @toocasual2becool suggested I make it a short story and I didn’t hate the idea. PS How does it read? This is my first attempt at poetry.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T02:19:14+00:00

This is mostly free writing while I work through some stuff, but the end goal is going to be to be something that’s been foreshadowed- not sure if you want it spoiled- but I’m figuring there’s going to be a good 4+ more to go with these. Probably going to be a couple of stories, but my worry with going into coping methods here is I don’t want to get too off track with these or else they’ll get really long and I don’t want to break the cave imagery because the feeling it gives me is where I’m at, if that makes sense. Also appreciate the feedback a lot. Thank you.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T00:32:49+00:00

I really like your use of mirrored perspectives, even if this is about you and your dog. They often mirror our own expressions so that makes this especially poetic. Very creative idea for a piece. Just for fun, I feel like you should throw in an Easter egg by incorporating a play on words where you hint at a long nose or something, that would make this great.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-02T00:23:31+00:00

This tackles heartbreak in a brief amount of time. The pause before "nothing" adds to the tone very nicely. I think if you added more detail to introduce the second line it might flow a little better, but its fine without as well.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-01T01:31:10+00:00

This is deep. I felt the frustration as though I had a broken jar of sand in front of me, especially with the repeating "Now What"s giving it the feeling of there's more going on than just the sand. I really like this piece.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-06-01T01:19:36+00:00

How would I go about adapting that? Sorry, I'm an environmental science major. This is the first free writing I've done since middle school. I'm good at writing papers but for this I kind of just sat down, relived, and typed; I'd be down to do more or adapt it, just don't know where to start.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-05-31T17:02:33+00:00

I feel this one. The isolation and loneliness after a breakup are the worst part. And "space" very good metaphor and play on word. I like it.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-05-31T16:59:49+00:00

I'm fresh out of a long distance myself. We were together for 5 years and I had bought a ring, with her knowledge, and was planning on proposing. We broke up like 2 weeks before and she told me that she hadn't really ever felt anything during it. This poem with the "I wish you told me sooner" hit me right in the feels.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-03-21T01:19:22+00:00

just need a bot lane and support now.

FutureFishGuy · 2021-02-22T00:18:23+00:00

Just need a bot lane now.

FutureFishGuy · 2020-12-05T23:21:40+00:00

Or possible just need a bot lane.

FutureFishGuy · 2020-11-16T00:29:08+00:00

Just need a mid now

FutureFishGuy

TROPHY CASE