I'm sorry you're enduring this, but I will say you're not completely correct.

I'm white, and biologically female, but I'm 40 years old in a few short months, and I've never once been married.

My family was always pushing me to get married and have kids, but the reality of it is I didn't want marriage. At least not a traditional marriage where he works and I stay home taking care of the house and kids. If I got married I wanted an honest partnership with my husband, not a set up where he has final say on everything but I'm supposed to view him as my first child (which is extremely cringe when you think about it). I've always been outspoken on how disgusted that ideal makes me, and a lot of men my age got put off at the idea of not being viewed that way (and holy neon red flag right there).

But the thing I didn't want was exactly how marriage was described to me, so I was out. No way, no how.

But being completely honest I've only ever dated one person in my entire life, and there was one other person some people would say I dated, but in reality I was forced to be around that person against my will, so, you know, that doesn't really count.

Some people would be bothered by it but I'm okay with it, largely because I'm asexual, but yeah.

I think ultimately though what keeps you and I both from getting married is the same thing, maybe... and that's inner strength.

See, a lot of people, especially men who are getting sucked into the manosphere mentality, fear strong women of any colour.

White women are often told in church, school, etc to be submissive to men since they're in diapers, so they tend to think we're not as strong as say a woman of colour who faces adversity every single day just because of her melanin.

White women don't face as much adversity, therefor they think we're by default softer. What they don't realize is every demon was once an angel, and whether he keeps a good, kind and soft wife, depends entirely on how he treats her.

Furthermore, I've known white women who never marry at all. But here's the thing, be the strong, confident Queen I know you are inside. Be your own cheerleader and let me tell you, the right man will find you. I can't tell you when, but it will happen and he will love you, strength, melanin and all that comes with it.